Know Your Football New Haven

Torres: So uh, Edinson… I was wondering if we could swap shirts

Cavani: Uh, yeah Fernando, why not…

Torres: Great! I am thrilled to be able to use your sweat in another mystical ritual that will result in my ability to score more goals! I used to have fine hair like you, I used to play more games like you, I used to be loved by fans like you, I want to score more goals like you. Thank you Edinson Cavani, you will be forever credited with helping me return to form! With every goal I shall owe everything to you.

Cavani: Uh, on second thoughts, I’ve got to go address the media, and there is no time to wait for you to get out of that track suit.

Torres: What? Hold on, this means everyth-

Cavani: It’s nothing personal, Fernando, you’ve just never looked good in blue.