Chris Illuminati — May 19th, 2012 marks the second anniversary of...

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

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May 19th, 2012 marks the second anniversary of this blog.

Honestly, I didn’t think it would last two months, let alone, two years. I’ve got several reasons for assuming my eventual desertion of this project. The first reason was based on the facts that I’ve started roughly 4453 different projects over the past few years and they all got boring, or seemed stupid, ironically right around the two month mark. The second reason was because writing parenting notes on Post-Its seemed like a pretty lazy and, honestly, stupid idea. Who the hell would want to read my thoughts, mistakes and screwed up ideas about raising a kid?

13,000+ Facebook fans
10,000 Tumblr followers
700k visitors in two years
1.1 million page views

Um, I guess that’s a couple people. I’ve also been wrong about 4453 other things so I guess I was bound to get something right.

To celebrate the first anniversary, I reposted the 50 best Messages. I’m super lazy and figure if it worked the first time, go with it until it bombs. So, to commemorate the second year, I’ve assembled my 20 favorite posts into one post. Unoriginal, but, I write on scraps of fucking paper and call it a blog so what the hell did you expect? A documentary narrated by Morgan Freeman. That’s in the works for the third anniversary. I’m in talks with Morgan’s people. Did you know he lives in Jersey? Found him in the phone book. All he wants is $500 and a one-year paid subscription to some website called Bang Bros. I’m assuming it’s about brothers who play the drums. This deal will get done.

Hope you enjoy reading these notes as much as I’ve enjoyed embarrassing myself and my family and documenting my kid’s first couple years in an easily reviewable format for his shrink.

Enjoy.

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