You have to give it to this woman Lilian Augusta Ruse de Havilland Fontaine. Although her mothering skills were questionable, Joan and Olivia probably wouldn’t have gone on to succeed in Hollywood had it not been for her. She made her daughters read the classics, taught them diction and proper manners, and encouraged them to participate in local plays. She failed both by not ending the petty dramas that occurred in childhood and by not telling either that she loved them nor did she openly express how proud she was of their accomplishments.
At times in her autobiography, Joan speaks of her mother’s complicated nature and how Lilian didn’t get on well with her own mother and had a long distance relationship with her older brother and sister. Perhaps this is why Lilian refused to address the difficult relationship that Joan and Olivia had- she couldn’t face her own past. This just serves a reminder that no mother is created the same; some are bad, some are great, and others a blend of both. Just as parents don’t choose their children, children don’t choose their parents.
