| [Scene: | my wife has just taken inventory of plants in our backyard] |
| Wife: | "What happened to the bleeding heart?" |
| Me: | [innocently] "What do you mean?" |
| Wife: | "It's in bad shape." |
| Me: | "Oh. I think it took a direct hit with a soccer ball." |
| Wife: | "Just one?" |
| Me: | "Maybe more than one." |
| Wife: | "And the irises? Was that a soccer ball too?" |
| Me: | "That was probably a football." |
| Wife: | "The rhododendrons?" |
| Me: | "Could have been a child on a bicycle doing offroading." |
| Wife: | "The hydrangea?" |
| Me: | "There was an... um... aggressive game of frisbee." |
| Wife: | "So you're telling me, don't bother with plants as long as our kids are playing in the backyard?" |
| Me: | "That's a distinct possibility." |
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