Praise the Lord and pass the toilet paper!

[Scene:	we recently had to deal with lice that the kids picked up at camp, and Luke, age 9, is playing with a hat that may have had nits on it...]
Me:	"Hey, put that down. It hasn't been washed yet."
Luke:	[throws it down] "Oh man. Do I have lice on my pants now?"
Me:	"Probably not, but let's not risk it."
Beth:	[age 6] "Is that better than having /ice/ on your pants?"
Me:	"Or /rice/ on your pants?"
Luke:	"How about /mice/ on your pants?"
Beth:	"Mice /in/ your pants!"
Luke:	"Maybe I have /Moses/ in my pants!"
Me:	"You have a Bible in your pocket?"
Luke:	[begins swaggering around the room] "It's in my butt! I can preach the Gospel from both ends!" [wiggles his bottom]
Me:	"I don't think the pastor would find this as funny as we do."
Luke:	"PRAISE THE LORD AND PASS THE TOILET PAPER!"