I met a 47-year old yogi the other night who didn’t look a day over 30, both in energy and appearance. “What’s your secret?” I asked him. “Let other people carry their shit,” he said quickly and definitively.
Hearing this hit me in the gut.
As someone who can feel other people’s energy intensely, I have a tendency to pick it up and carry it with me. To take it personally. To let it weigh me down.
There are two strategies I’m playing with lately to navigate this:
a. “That totally sucks. That saddens me to hear that.” When things aren’t going well for others, I’ll acknowledge and empathize with heart and share what is alive in me by hearing about their situation.
And depending on the circumstances and closeness of the connection, I’ll ask:
b. “How can I support you?” I find myself torn up when I’m uncertain as to how I can be of service and support when challenges arise. Asking this simple question takes the pressure off and encourages the other person to clarify their ask. “Oh there’s nothing for you to do! This is a me thing.” or “I’d love if you could do this one thing…” or “I just need you to hold space like you are right now…” are some of the responses I’ve received lately.
Which brings me to: works well for you?