How do you love yourself into right acting, right doing, right being when you are so inherently aware of past tendencies to not act, not do, not be someone worth loving?
Even as I write the word “worth” I know that that is technically incorrect.
Who we ARE is worth loving.
It’s the ACTION, the thing that is done that can/should be judged, not the doer.
“Hate the sin, not the sinner.”
But what if that sinner is you?
How do you renounce the sin, fully grasp its implications, and separate the Self?
How can the Self move on? Let go? Be happy?
How can the Self move forward once more knowing the pattern it has set in motion is to fail each time the moment of truth arrives?
How does one “feel good” about oneself when one’s past actions predict nothing worth betting on?
And yet, I can’t give up on me.
This is not arrogance. Only logic. Fact.
Because if I, the doer, give up, how can the right action be done?
I must hold the course.
~ mn