Closer
My favorite lyrical ideas rarely happen when I go Iooking for them. They’re like the friend who doesn’t call, he just drops by your place and makes himself at home.
“How do the leaves look so alive when they’re dying?”
As you might imagine, that idea struck me as I was admiring the fall colors along my jogging* route. It was a cool concept to me, this idea that the most remarkable traits of a leaf are shown through its death. But, as it often happens, I wasn’t able to connect that big idea to something smaller, an intimate situation worth writing a song about. And I couldn’t just make one up. The only songs I’m able to write with any kind of success are the ones that bubble up from personal experience. I’m no good with theory.
It wasn’t until last January when I sat down at my usual spot at Whiskeytown Lake that I put the rest of the pieces together. Here’s a clip from that day:
It’s hard to believe I could operate under such miserable conditions, I know. But it came together, I found the life experience to draw from.
That year I had a front row seat to the pain of a dear friend. Jesus said, “blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” I used to translate this as, “mourning really sucks, but it’ll be ok, it’ll pass.” But that’s not the promise.
When God blesses you, it’s more than just “ok.” The comfort of Jesus is a tremendous blessing that far outweighs the depression of painful circumstance. It’s like an open highway into God’s heart. It’s like a safe-house, that through the process of pain becomes your permanent dwelling. It’s an unprecedented Nearness. And on top of that, as you accept his comfort, beauty radiates from you like an autumn leaf. It’s a deep, mysterious thing.
We gain access to that blessing through mourning, not the pain itself. It’s actually a choice. My friend mourned well, and I marveled at the beauty that shone through her many tears.
So that lyric grew into the first song on my EP, “Closer.” It’s a bit strange how it turned out. It’s at the same time literal and figurative, which I hope is more endearing than it is confusing. I used to refer to it as “the weakest song on my record.” But I hereby rescind that remarkˆ. It’s grown on me, which is a bit weird to say about a song you wrote, I guess.
Anyway here it is for a listen. And just for fun, I’m making it free to download this weekend. Click here to get it FREE from my Bandcamp site.
Januaried,
B
*driving
ˆthe new weakest song on my record is “Bump & Grind,” my R. Kelly cover. I tried to do the same thing I did with “500 Miles.” It’s good, but ya know…not greatº.
º Ok, that didn’t actually happen. Sorry about that, and an additional sorry if this post ended up sounding especially self-centered. Unintentional.
