so me and my siblings (theres 3 of us) were eating dinner with my dad and we were talking about dad jokes and all of a sudden my dad goes “ive only made 3 jokes in my life and theyre all sitting in front of me”

thats it

the dad joke to end all dad jokes

I would be scared stiff of meeting anyone in the Star Wars cast, except for Mark Hamill. I mean, I could not possibly feel nervous around this fluffy sixty-year-old man who calls himself “Master Hamster” and spends his livelihood creating the best (worst?) dad jokes to ever exist. He’s just so friendly and open and full of sunshine, man. If I happened to see any other famous actor anywhere, I’d be terrified, but Mark Hamill…nah, if I saw him, I’d have to restrain myself from hugging him on the spot.

I tell dad jokes but I have no kids.

I’m a faux pa.

• green mario
• moon moon
• Shrek (The Shrekening?)
• pokemon fusions
• "bitch i might be"
• swaggy vs swaggie
• heck/heckie
• flower crowns
• swiggity swag
• doge
• the short-lived furniture fandom
• miley cyrus
• furbies
• "first of all how dare you"
• dad jokes
• frick frack
• "surprise bitch"

There is no way that anyone could convince me that Natasha “shall we play a game” Romanoff and Bucky “let’s go to a science convention on my last night before deployment” wouldn’t be the nerdiest assassin duo to ever make dad jokes while offing bad guys

Today I was talking to my dad and I referred to myself as his son(I’m genderfluid btw) and he said
“Today’s a Son day huh?”
And I was like “yeah”
And he was like “huh, I thought today was a Saturday, not a Sunday”
And I just laughed for like 5 minutes