OT5 Ride Or Die

tbh it's not how touchy-feely zayn and liam are with each other that got me into believing they were real (all the boys are EXTREMELY affectionate with one another). For me it was small instances and moments that weren't meant for cameras and mics but accidentally got out anyway, like for me, it was at the NJR awards in 2013 where zayn was leaning into liam so much you'd have to blind (or straight) not to interpret that as romantic/non-platonic

I actually agree with you on that one.  The boys are all extremely affectionate with each other for sure, but I would argue that how Ziam are with other is different from the other boys [X X].  But I would definitely agree that the most undeniable moments are the ones not meant for cameras and mics that accidentally got out anyway, or the ones where Zayn and Liam seemed to not give a fuck or just happened to forget where they were.

Like, as you mention, the 2013 NRJ Awards.  I totally get what you mean, anon.  You really would have to be totally oblivious (or heteroblivious… bless the straights’ hearts) to interpret this as platonic.  Husband levels reaching critical mass…

Zayn was leaning right into Liam.  Right casually resting on him.  In this video you can see him doing it (he even acknowledges the camera for a second).

This was also the time when Zayn told Liam “I love you” in front of a live studio audience.  Excuse me while the flesh melts off my bones.

Intimate gestures at award shows are not unheard of, like when Zayn whispered into Liam’s ear as he rubbed his thigh at the 2013 VMAs, which the overhead camera caught when 1D won an award:

There are little hand holds and finger touches, like in this moment where they were taking a photo:

They even sneak these touchy-feely behaviors in the middle of taped interviews, possibly because they expect them to simply not be focued on or edited out, or because the editors simply missed the moment, or some combination of the two.  Like the MUZU.TV interview, which is 13 minutes of pure pain:

Really?  They look like freshmen college students trying to sneak touches in the middle of a seminar.  Maybe they just could not help themselves, or most of these little touches and lean-ins were subconscious.  Maybe they expected these moments not to make the final cut and they did anyway.

That’s the thing though: some of these intimate gestures happen in public, in situations where Zayn and Liam probably do not expect to be recorded and/or just deadass do not care—and it is their ordinariness that gives them away.  Like all the times that Zayn has held Liam by the waist or the small of his back:

As they say and I always make it a point to reiterate, queerness is an open secret.  It can be happening right before our very eyes and as long as there is enough plausible deniability and heteronormative conditioning [X X X X X], trust, know and believe that people will and do go through the mental loops and machinery to explain away the gay.

Because again, some of these unambiguously not platonic and very casual moments made the final cut, and I cannot help but think that Zayn and Liam were so casual about them because they simply figured that they would never make it past the editing and “fixing”—but due to shoddy editing, they did anyway.  Like the infamous lap sitting moment from 1D Day:

Which again, happened multiple times, in public.  Like it was no big deal.  I get the feeling these moments somehow slipped past the publicity machine and reached us:

We know that the boys are all cognizant of their own behavior in public, because they occasionally break form and make some indication of it.  For example, when Liam leans into Zayn after Zayn picks him up off the floor and presses his lips into Zayn’s arm, only to stop after he looks off camera where a handler is—as if he realizes that he is doing something that he “should not be,” and that he could get in trouble for it.  (In the video the handler’s voice is heard at one point and the boys respond to them by looking their direction.)

And we know that they can get in trouble for being “too touchy” in public, like when an off camera handler seems to gesture to Liam to stop leaning into Zayn, which makes Liam do so, but not without loudly sighing exasperatedly while looking rather sour:

Some of these very non-platonic moments happen in the middle of concerts, where literally thousands of people with recording devices are watching.  As if they are subconscious, or they think they can get away with it and that no one will notice, or they are already covered by heteronormative biases and straight-is-the-norm goggles [X X X X] and the well-wrought machine of closeting and publicity [X X X X X | X X X] that encourage people to explain these moments away:

What makes these moments particularly intimate is that they are not just gentle face touches, but that in the first moment Liam is clearly down (a relative of his had died the night of that concert) and in the second Zayn is obviously annoyed with Liam.

More small gestures of intimacy, like Liam and Zayn’s “fist bump”:

Or gentle caresses of the neck, or more fiddling around with their fingers:

Remember when Liam fell on stage and Zayn rushed to his side?  And rubbed his inner thigh?  Totally not an invasion of your platonic bro pal’s personal space.

The small instances and moments are perhaps the sweetest.  Ah, the little things.  [Zayn and Liam’s duet in “Little Things“ plays]