can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky r like shooting stars

The local oldies station just played "All Star" by Smashmouth. Which was made in 1999 and popularized again in "Shrek" in 2001.

"All Star" is an oldie.

My Third Wednesday INSIDE

Greetings friends! 

I hope me and my blog find you well and in good health. I am currently writing to you from my home in Detroit, where we will be taking on our fourth week of quarantine next week and I am absolutely and utterly drained already–and I mean physically, mentally, and emotionally. But, before I get into all that, I welcome you to my blog! I started this circa 2016 to put some of my journalistic work out in the open, however finding out we could use a blog format really sparked this idea to revive this gem. I am restarting the feed and will upload all my journals as blog posts until further notice. Hopefully, even after this class and with the help of the material we learn, I can carry on this blog–make it something’ nice, y’know. 

Anyway, something that I really want to talk about in this week’s journal relates to a conversation between Rieux and Rambert in The Plague by Albert Camus. The piece goes as follows: 

The last couple of weeks I have seen my city, my community, my neighborhood hit its low–without a doubt. It started out with 12 and then before our eyes it skyrocketed to the hundreds of people who have lost their lives while thousands are testing positive. I felt safe at first–when I arrived back from K, solely due to the fact that my community knows how to take care of one another and because of that I knew my community was strong, but covid-19  (covid-19 AKA corona virus will be referred to with a lowercase ‘c’ because in my conscious of being I’ve realized it’s already taken so much from me already, respect is the last thing covid-19 gets from me.)proved to be stronger. It is an understatement when I say that I am scared. 

For the sake of our humanity, my mom and I started to go on a morning drive at around 7:30AM twice a week. We don’t get off, we don’t stop, we don’t shop, and around 8:15ish we head back home to make breakfast. Last week, the two days that we went out I noticed a change in my neighborhood so drastically. The first day was Sunday, March 29th. The streets were empty. No one in sight really and I live in the city, if you don’t make it to Michigan Ave or Vernor Hwy by 8AM you might just be in stand-still- bumper-to-bumper traffic for some time.  It was scary but relieving that my community was taking the right precautions to keep themselves safe–or so I thought. That same week, Saturday April 4th my mom and I went for our drive and to my surprise EVERYBODY and their mommas were outside. Restaurants/public places have been closed for some time now, but there’s pick-up with lines out the door, kids playing in the neighborhood, bakeries still open and operating, older folks walking in groups, and the neighborhood carnicerias? Parking lots had cars lined up for miles while people were pushing out carts filled way above the brim with food, toiletries and more. Don’t even get me started on the gas stations, with gas starting at $1.19 they have been filled with lines since I have gotten home. A local restaurant has even taken it upon themselves to give out one free roll of toilet paper for every meal over $20. I’ve attached the picture.

My initial thought was: ARE YOU PEOPLE MAD????? What is going on right now. People weren’t evening wearing protective gear and 

people in the streets young kids and adults were taunting drivers as they passed by spitting into the street, touching their own faces. At this point in time, I realized there were two things happening right now: 1. was this idea that we are not allowed to fear or experience anything in the nature of an outbreak or pandemic because you are either vulnerable–emotionally and physically–or immune (Immune In the context of this journal I am defining/using immune as a word to describe the ‘everything will be okay, nothing is *actually* happening/’I haven’t got it so I’m fine’  notion that people use as a way to assert dominance over the vulnerable group); 2. CAPITALISM DOES NOT SLEEP NOR TAKE BREAKS OR USE A SICK DAY. On the ride back home, I looked up–and I probably shouldn’t of because I am already so worked up–the numbers of cases that tested positive, death toll, and the locations and what drew me more concerned was the fact that I couldn’t even find numbers, stats, anything on my neighborhood–SW Detroit (notably known as Mexicantown, but we won’t get it to the racist politics of that–atleast not in these journals). I thought to myself, isn’t that just something? A predominantly low-income, brown and black, immigrant, undocumented filled neighnorhood and no specific stats or data on it? Who helps us? How do we take precautions when we don’t even know what we don’t know. The only thing we have is the death toll rising for our general city. 

I reflect on the dialogue I quoted above and  about how decency is righting the plague. But, there hasn’t been decency since this started. People working until their very last cough, local stores/businesses having to close for who knows how long, people not being able to afford a living cause of job closures, food stores making a killing (no pun intended–obviously) with their new high prices, people going to the store to buy because now we are actually in need, then people are exposed and get sick. It’s a never ending cycle.  Leaving us no room to take care of ourselves because capitalism, prejudice, and our well being have to co-exist and it seems that giving up a little decency in order to prevent from falling through the cracks is justifiable? I’m not sure. But, when you have no choice to work, because you have to provide, then what? Or any of the other narratives apply to you? People are struggling in many more ways than one and its not like they haven’t been already but its hurting more than ever before. It seems like nobody wins here and it frustrates me. I try to stay optimistic, friends, but the reality is, without the right approach/staying in quarantine we are setting ourselves up. I just know, unlike Dr. Rieux, we are not doing our job–our part–to slow this down. And that worries me for my family, for my community–for my city. 

Stay safe and wash your hands, please. 

Juanita

Bruno mars with a appearance from Zendaya

Me everytime Marvel release a movie:

Bruno Mars’ personality in five seconds

Chris Evans at the ‘Captain America: Civil War’ photocall in Los Angeles (April 10, 2016)

I always say that the times in my life when I’ve been happiest are the times when I’ve seen, like, a sunset. 

FRIDAS

Frida (2002) — dir. Julie Taymor

Frida Kahlo, New York, 1946

more gifs here

Frida Kahlo - Art Digital by Ricardo Lostanaw

psicodelia - psychedelic

Frida Kahlo - Self-Portrait in Red and Gold Dress, 1941 x the-eternal-moonshine