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can you keep a secret...?

@musingsofasexworker / musingsofasexworker.tumblr.com

determined to be successful at all costs. spoiled girlfriend/sugar baby, future lawyer. who knows where the future will lead...all I know is that i'm getting paid :)
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Happy Valentine's Day ❤️ Woke up to a flower arrangement delivered as well as this poem (that he texted me the night before, names edited out), and our honeymoon itinerary! This is our second Vday together and it's crazy to think how long we've know each other ( at least compared to my other relationships outside of sex work). There are times when I really wonder if I should get married so young but it helps to get reminded that he genuinely cares about me despite how we met 😊

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Growing up as a nerdy bookworm, Emma Watson’s portrayal of Hermoine gave me so much so I’m really bummed that as an adult, she became the literal face of white feminism. And she tried to come for Beyoncé so I can’t even claim her as a problematic fave, all her speeches are so scripted and non inclusive, idk why I expected better from her.

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NYC!

Trains are stopping after 2 hours. No drivers allowed on the road after 11pm. Shit cray ….

Order your food from now sugars . Stay in , get your Netflix on .. Get into a group chat , fix your profile , w/e

xobabenextdoor Even LIRR?

I heard that LIRR is shutting down early but I'll check, I think the PATH too. Let me order my food now, dominos already stopped delivering.

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Now is about that time of year where I wished I lived ANYWHERE but the east coast. F this snowstorm 👎

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mfjrr

^^THIS. I never got Hemingway, I always wanted to stab my eyes out reading him and he was horrible to all his wives. At the end of the day, Plath could actually WRITE so it's misogyny to assume we love her solely because we "romanticized" her suicide, as if she wasn't talented in her own right.

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Spa day with GM, this place was great and conveniently around the corner so we became members 😊

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God, I'm so sick of it! The traditional form of sugaring has NOTHING to do with sex work! It is the same like NORMAL dating or having a NORMAL friendship- not necessarily having sex as a component!

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sex has DEF been a component in every vanilla relationship for me lol maybe i’m just a big huge slut!!! i never said there wasn’t platonic sugaring but it is not the norm, just like asexual relationships are still considered unusual by some. As for friendships I’ve hooked up at some time with like 85% I’ve considered close friends but never intentionally. Probably because I like to get fucked up. I don’t consider myself a sex pozzie but sex happens,  and as long as there is enthusiastic consent then I mean it’s really NOT a big deal. I like money a lot better than I used to like sex, which was a lot, but sex still happens even though I never really seek it out or intend to find it. 

and bb, sugaring has traditionally been VERY sexual. How do you think Eva Peron got where she was? Or Mata Hari who was given the equivalent of 2 million francs if we adjust for inflation, by a prince no less? Many “sugar babies” became official courtesans or concubines, sometimes even legal wives, but they were still looked upon like the other sex workers. Even with legal rights people still saw them as sinners, they weren’t the “good” women, they were still the whores and a necessary evil in most people’s minds. Just because it was more open and accepted doesn’t mean people thought of it positively. Clearly you know NOTHING about traditional sugar relationships and I am laughing because I can literally talk about how they go back into antiquity and they have ALWAYS been about sex and seduction. The greatest poetry and art was created about these women who were truly ahead of their time, and it’s a disgrace to attempt to sanitize them. I honestly could write an entire fucking blog about historic sugar babies and you better believe I have considered it. I’ve literally been reading about courtesans and such since I was old enough to read, sure the mechanics of a kept woman might have been different back then, but you did say traditional. 

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“The traditional form of sugaring has NOTHING to do with sex work!” are you serious?? do you actually believe this??

There has ALWAYS been an overlap. Women who worked in brothels (generally high end ones) would enter into arrangements where their client would rent apartments for them and buy them gifts, which enabled the clients to see the women when they wanted privately. This is where the term ‘kept woman’ comes from - which, not surprisingly, is considered a synonym for courtesan and even prostitute sometimes.

Why do you hate hookers so much btw?

I mean tbh even before “burlesque” and other forms of sensual dance fully caught on, even ballet dancers were basically supported by high rolling clients (Napolean even had a special peep hole to look into their dressing rooms). This was because for the most part, in opera, the only women who made a decent amount and had workers rights were the main singers, aka the Primma Donnas aka Divas. And like looky loo why we asscociate those words with high maintenance “bitchy” vain women? Because they were literally the only women dating back around 500 years who could demand their own rights and be heard.

And yes, many kept women started out in brothels. I mean, both Mata Hari and Eva Peron were both recorded to have work in brothels, though they kept that under wrap, until they were able to move on to sugar daddies or patrons. It was a huge stepping stone for many women who came from nothing.

Or what about Veronica Franco, from when Venice was filled was courtesans (aka whores)? She seduced a prince, and courtesans were often MUCH more educated than any other women back then. I mean the wives couldn’t even READ and these women were reading literature and learning languages I’ll never even hope to!! 

Like literally Braavos from Game of Thrones is based on Venice at the time and the courtesans that lived there. That’s how much power they had and the overlap between “courtesan” and just straight sex worker was so much it was just basically about money, status, and education, not some arbitrary status about the difference between sugar babies and sex workers. 

(And btw yes I love going into fucking Eva Peron’s sex work history because she basically ended up becoming a Saint in Argentina. inspiration 4 lyfe)

thank you she-minions, it’s nice to see someone else isn’t completely ignorant about the history some of these women claim to know. I was starting to lose hope <3

deuxcielos

PLEASE do start that historic blog!

Damn maybe I will!!! <3 I could use a hobby. I just thought no one would wanna read it. :0

I bet lots would! Not even just girls in the industry, but history nerds everywhere. Women are so neglected by historians (no surprise given historians in our culture have been men by and large for most of history) or certainly at least by teachers in conventional schooling’s history classes, so the subject’s extra interesting. Have you ever read Shelved Dolls? It was my favorite column while it was going, covered all kinds of interesting ladies in history, and when I first discovered it it struck me how little I’ve ever learned about women of note. It was inspiring, and I bet your blog would be too—and also just fascinating.

Awww than you bb you are too sweet. I actually think I’m going to start working on it. :o I’d be really cool for like, newbies in the industry especially to learn the history and for civilians to actually see how influential sex workers have been throughout history. I don’t think that I’m the best writer but I am a huge trvia nerd so meh, might turn out alright :)

Omg please do this, I would be so interested. I'm ready the art of seduction now and the best parts of the book are when they talk about the historical figures who were seducers, if not fully sex workers as well. Someone really needs to make an anthology of the courtesans/kept women in history.

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Idk why my tumblr app keeps unfollowing people, it's so awkward following them back. I promise you weren't unfollowed intentionally 🙈

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AHS :Freak show….. Was the worse season to-date.

I was so mad that this was Jessica Lange's last season, her storyline could have been so much better. Ryan Murphy just needs to get new writers or end this show, I would hate to see it go the way of Glee.

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