alternatives to "ladies and gentlemen"
- cads and wastrels
- fellow scoundrels
- ladies, gentlemen, and interesting miscellanea
- beloved friends & tolerated acquaintances
- entities of interest
- paying audience members & assorted freeloaders
- the fbi's most and least wanted
- discerning guests & those of you with fuck all else to do on a tuesday evening
- esteemed gutter filth
more from the notes
- welcome friends and enemies
- ladies, gentlemen, and others
- scalliwags and roustebouts
- all ya'lls
- sworn nemeses and esteemed henchpersons
- mommy bloggers and twitter dads
- friends, family, and freeloaders
- allies, enemies, and those I'm still deciding about
- a warm welcome to everyone who managed to sneak past the guards
first day at college chem lab and your TA opens with this