The Buttercreams + text posts

me: *sees fake relationship fic*

me: *breathes heavily*

cause im mr brightside

Joe at every party

My kink is husbands & wives who are still portrayed as very much in love with each other, because even after years of commitment and kids, they still talk to each other, go on fun random adventures and try new things. No resentment. No portrayal of marriage as a chore. Just actual love.

#ok my favorite trope is ‘couple against the world’ #but not in a dramatic way #more like in a domestic ‘the Jones’s are at the door’ ‘lock down the house hide the kids turn off the lights we aren’t home’ #or like a ‘someone insulted OUR child? let’s fight them’ ‘I’ll get the megaphone’ #‘lets go to this work dinner and sneak as many mini corndogs as we can home’

the real glo up is when you accept everyone for who they are and you accept yourself for who you are and focus your energy on enjoying life and making the best of every moment instead of looking around at everyone else’s life with envy and self loathing

omg :’))))

        So can we make the most of no time?     Can you hold me?     Can you make me leave my demons     & my broken pieces behind?

me going through the jaspar tag for 5 minutes

Since joining Tumblr, I’ve met a lot of young queer people. Look, I’m a bisexual man in a gay relationship, and I’m approaching 30. I was still a kid when Matthew Shepard’s story was being covered on the news. I remember thinking, “I better keep my mouth shut about these feelings I’m having.”

And then I met Dominic when I was 12, and people could see how in love we were. And we got the shit beat out of us. The year I met him, some kids in the grade above me held me down against the bleachers in our gym and stomped on my hand until my fingers broke. Instead of sending me to the nurse, the teacher sent me to the assistant principal to explain the situation. She asked why the kids had beat me up. I said, “They were calling me gay.”

Her response was, “Well, are you?”

My, “I don’t know,” earned a call to my parents, and I was outed. Efforts were made to keep me from seeing Dom. Throughout high school, Dom’s stepmother intensified these efforts. He slept in the basement of the house. Although he was an incredibly talented student, he was prohibited from participating in any extracurriculars. He suffered a lot of physical abuse during those years.

The day he turned 18, he packed up everything he had and walked to my house, and we’ve lived together ever since. Things are better, but they’re not perfect. I’ve had trucks pull up next to me at stoplights and, seeing the pride sticker on my car, through old drinks and garbage into my window. I no longer speak to my dad’s side of the family. I haven’t been to see them for Christmas or Thanksgiving in years. One of my uncles had cornered me at Thanksgiving when I was 17 and said, “I’m not going to judge you, but I’d be happy to break your neck so God can do the judging a little sooner.”

I joined a support group for trans and intersex people. When I joined, 40 people attended regularly. Within the year, the group was half the size it had been. Some couldn’t make it anymore, because they were staying at the shelter, where their stay hinged on them agreeing to instead to attend homophobic sermons. Some were put in correctional therapy. Five of them died. Three of those, I didn’t know, but I knew Alex, the 19 year old who was fag-dragged in Kentucky and died a day later in the hospital, and I knew Stephanie, who went home to Alabama to care for her mom in hospice and was beaten to death with a baseball bat by her mom’s boyfriend.

Tumblr is not reality. The dynamic here does not reflect the dynamic out there. Here’s the part where I finally make a point, and it might be extremely unpopular - but guys, value your allies. Value each other. We are met with enough hate in our daily lives to enter an online safe-space and meet more hate from our own, over petty things. Don’t go after one another over every little thing you find problematic.

Learn to see nuance. Maybe the word “queer” bothers you, and you see a gay man using it as an umbrella term. Maybe someone called a trans man a trans woman because they’re confused about terminology, but the post where they did it was voicing support for the trans community. Maybe someone is just asking a question, wanting to learn more. Stop. Attacking. These. People.

Allies are being driven away. Members of our own community are being ostracized. Others are feeling nervous and estranged, and it’s largely because of places like Tumblr, where the social justice movement is quickly becoming violent and radical. I am begging you, stop nitpicking “problematic” things and start directing your efforts to create real change. When it comes to comes to your allies, forget the “social justice warrior” mentality and put down your torch. Educate calmly. Be respectful. Be understanding. Be forgiving. And I’m certainly not saying that your anger doesn’t have a good place - when you are met with bigots on the street, congress members who want to pass hateful laws, violent protesters, abusive parents, prejudiced teachers, that is when you need to be a warrior. That’s when it counts. In the real world. When you have the opportunity to protect people from real harm. Attacking your would-be allies via anonymous asks is just going to lose us ground in the long run. And we don’t have time for that, not when trans women of color are being murdered every day, not when states are still fighting against marriage equality, not when there are politicians in office who believe that trans people are possessed by demons, not when we’ve just lost 50 brothers and sisters to one gunman, not when the media won’t even admit that the attack was homophobic.

Please step back. Look at the big picture. Look at where we are, globally. Don’t just log on to your safe space and attack your allies over small missteps. That’s like washing the dishes in a house that’s on fire, kids. Let’s fight on the battlefield, and when we come home to each other, let’s just focus on bandaging up our wounds so we can go out and win the war.

Signal boost to this unbelievably important message.

Whenever I see people attacking others for things they might not even be familiar enough with to know how to educate themselves on yet (despite the sentiments being in the right place) it always makes me think of this one time I was riding the subway and saw an old man who had fallen down the stairs and was in extremely bad shape. The medical people had been called and were doing their job, but everyone was scared and upset and feeling helpless. There was nothing I could do but stay out of the way, so I left and I just remember the feeling of getting further and further away from the site of the accident, and how that bubble of awareness kind of slowly evaporated. You turn the corner from the immediate vicinity where everyone was panicking and you pass by people who have not seen the old man, but could tell from the commotion and worried faces that something was wrong. Then you turn another corner and even fewer people are aware something terrible happened down the hall.

I remember getting up to the street, where absolutely no one had any reason to know that there was an old man dying so close to them and getting this surge of completely irrational anger. Like “how can you all be so happy at a time like this? DON’T YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT’S GOING ON?”, and to a lesser extent, almost like I was angry at the idea that I had to experience this scene and feel bad about it but they would never have any reason to know about the situation happening underground

Of course rationally I knew that obviously there was know way they could know or appreciate what had happened on the subway, but that gut reptilian brain reaction of “how can you be ignorant about this thing that is consuming my whole head right now” really made me stop and take stock of how easy it is to forget that some people haven’t gone through all the same doors that you have yet. Sometimes people are just going to be so removed from situations they can’t even KNOW how much they don’t know yet.

I made these earlier today and I think they’re super cute ◕ ‿ ◕✿

feel free to use them as you please! they’re made to fit iPhone 6, but should be fine on other screens too! 

[also if you want them without the text, then message me and i’ll send i’ll send it to you!]