I don’t know who needed to hear this today, but just because you have RSD does not mean you get to tell people that you hurt (and they tell you you hurt them in a respectful way) that your RSD is making you feel bad. No, your morals are making you feel bad.
It goes both ways. Not everything that you feel bad about is real, and also not everything that you feel bad about is just “your RSD lying to you.” Sometimes, you need to listen to that ‘i feel bad’ voice in your head and apologize the right way.
If someone tells you, “hey, I just wanted to let you know that what you said/did earlier kind of hurt. I know you didn’t mean it, but if you couldn’t say/do that again, I’d appreciate it.” YOU DON’T TURN IT AROUND ON THEM AND MAKE THEIR HURT AN OPPORTUNITY FOR YOU TO BE HURT.
Apology is NOT ‘im sorry you felt that way/im sorry that’s how you feel/im sorry you felt hurt by my…’
NO. You take responsibility like a decent human being and you apologize the right way WITHOUT transferring blame.
I’ve had many experiences with people who have all types of guilt-riddled disorders, RSD, depression, anxiety, etc. who think that they are always being attacked when someone gently tries to tell them that they were hurt by their actions.
YOU SHOULD NOT BE AFRAID TO TELL SOMEONE WITH ANY TYPE OF NEURODIVERGENCY THAT THEY HAVE HURT YOU. DO NOT ALLOW THEM TO GET AWAY WITH THAT!
This message is ESPECIALLY for those who also struggle with RSD, depression, anxiety, etc. and have been hurt by someone who has a similar disorder as you.
If they can’t give YOU the common courtesy of being understanding about YOUR OWN sensitivity WITHOUT making it about THEM, then that’s not RSD talking baby, That’s Manipulation.
And yes, people with RSD and any host of other disorders are fully capable of being manipulative as anyone else.
P.S., this is written by someone with RSD themself
