Only The Sun Would Be Brighter - Keith J. Castillo (via mostwiseofheart)
Cao Cao - Romance of The Three Kingdoms (via indigo-heavens)
@sonoficeandfire ♥’d for way more nonsense
> “Does… anyone else hear that?”
His fingers had been skimming through various files he was given before to review. Simple documents on his next tasks for him to pick what he felt he best suited. Yet, as he lay over the lounging room’s couch, he could have sworn he heard the soft thrumming of… something.
As though on cue, his head had turned as feeling something approach him. And with a yelp at the sudden person, he promptly fell from his once comfortable perch and onto the ground.
> “ WHAT THE HELL!?”
This certainly wasn’t what he’d expected to find. Blinking quickly, the doctor looked around, taking in what appeared to be the lounge of... well, he wasn’t really sure. Couches often defined a lounge, as did the rest of the furniture, but very much of the scene was, well, alien. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d made an error, but this seemed far-fetched, even for him. Brown eyes drifted down at the shout, and an apologetic expression settled itself on his face.
“I’m so sorry, I hope I didn’t surprise you.” That was the appropriate formality, wasn’t it? Youmei never had been good with apologies. “Are you all right?”
@sonoficeandfire ♥’d for nonsense
> “I know I’m a foreigner… but I can’t be that interesting.”
He’d noticed the glances back and forth between people here and there. Especially a certain one or two men. Was it his clothes? He’d tried to dress properly for this era. He knew their language… was it his hair?
There was no other way around it, the man was incredibly suspicious. Everything was wrong, but nothing in particular stood out to Youmei as being so. Perhaps his clothes were slightly ostentatious, perhaps it was the mild uncertainty with which he moved through the crowds, perhaps it was the unfamiliar (but not incorrect) accent he spoke with.
Everything and nothing.
Two guards were milling about nearby, watching the man in the same way. He supposed he could allow the person to be arrested, such things weren’t uncommon in these times after all, but the thought of standing by didn’t seem particularly of benefit to the roaming scholar. After all, if he were tormented to death, what information would be lost with his corpse?
Throwing on a smile, Zhu Youmei strode confidently toward the newcomer, threading his way expertly through the busy street. “Ah~ there you are!” He called out before placing a hand on the other’s shoulder in mock camaraderie. “I was beginning to think you’d changed your mind and gone back on our deal,” he laughed convincingly, carefully, as he attempted to steer the stranger away from prying eyes. Casting his gaze toward the guard pair momentarily, he smirked at his companion. “What do you say we stop for lunch before getting down to business, mister...?”
How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces? These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place. ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! _______________________________ ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth? WITNESS: July 18th. ATTORNEY: What year? WITNESS: Every year. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you? WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which. ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you? WITNESS: Forty-five years. _________________________________ ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget.. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ____________________________________ ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ. ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you shitting me? _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Getting laid ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: She had three children , right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death.. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Take a guess. ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight. _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral… _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question? ______________________________________ And last: ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No.. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
Reblogging because there are some sassy little shits out there.
Hey sinners
glxtzy:
nozoya:
Y’all deserve to know which layer of Hell you’re going to
Take the Dante’s Inferno test here and tag your results so we can find out who sins the hardest
The sweet light no longer strikes against your eyes. Your shade has been banished to… the Seventh Level of Hell!
Guarded by the Minotaur, who snarls in fury, and encircled within the river Phlegethon, filled with boiling blood, is the Seventh Level of Hell. The violent, the assasins, the tyrants, and the war-mongers lament their pitiless mischiefs in the river, while centaurs armed with bows and arrows shoot those who try to escape their punishment. The stench here is overpowering. This level is also home to the wood of the suicides- stunted and gnarled trees with twisting branches and poisoned fruit. At the time of final judgement, their bodies will hang from their branches. In those branches the Harpies, foul birdlike creatures with human faces, make their nests. Beyond the wood is scorching sand where those who committed violence against God and nature are showered with flakes of fire that rain down against their naked bodies. Blasphemers and sodomites writhe in pain, their tongues more loosed to lamentation, and out of their eyes gushes forth their woe. Usurers, who followed neither nature nor art, also share company in the Seventh Level.
Level | Score Purgatory | Very Low Level 1 | Very Low Level 2 | Moderate Level 3 | Moderate Level 4 | Low Level 5 | Extreme Level 6 | Very High Level 7 | Extreme Level 8 | Very High Level 9 | High
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Eighth Level of Hell - The Malebolge! Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Level 8- the Malebolge
Many and varied sinners suffer eternally in the multi-leveled Malebolge, an ampitheatre-shapped pit of despair Wholly of stone and of an iron colour: Those guilty of fraudulence and malice; the seducers and pimps, who are whipped by horned demons; the hypocrites, who struggle to walk in lead-lined cloaks; the barraters, who are ducked in boiling pitch by demons known as the Malebranche. The simonists, wedged into stone holes, and whose feet are licked by flames, kick and writhe desperately. The magicians, diviners, fortune tellers, and panderers are all here, as are the thieves. Some wallow in human excrement. Serpents writhe and wrap around men, sometimes fusing into each other. Bodies are torn apart. When you arrive, you will want to put your hands over your ears because of the lamentations of the sinners here, who are afflicted with scabs like leprosy, and lay sick on the ground, furiously scratching their skin off with their nails. Indeed, justice divine doth smite them with its hammer.
Level | Score Purgatory | Very Low Level 1 - Limbo | Very Low Level 2 | High Level 3 | Moderate Level 4 | High Level 5 | Moderate Level 6 - The City of Dis | Low Level 7 | High Level 8 - The Malebolge | Very High Level 9 - Cocytus | High
* : like or reblog if you're a roleplayer 20 yrs or older.
[Quick and Dirty Obligatory Rules Post]
Since a fellow rper pointed it out that I don’t have a rules page, I’ll just leave this here. You can always find others under my “rules” tag.
- Random invasions of my askbox are good, even if we haven’t interacted!
- I reserve the right to be selective. I’ve been around the block before, y’all.
- Crossovers/Multiship/etc are allowed, but if I don’t know anything about the series your character is from, we’re probably going to have a difficult time making something work. I am often willing to try, though!
- The muse isn’t the mun, please remember this. Just because Youmei starts a fight with your character doesn’t mean I dislike you!
- On the topic of shipping, I don’t control the muse. His choice, and nothing you or I can say will change his mind.
- Muse is generally androromantic/demisexual, but is normally nicer to women than men.
- If you have a question about anything not covered, please send me an ask or chat me! I don’t bite, honest!
Send ☭ for a vs. battle quote to your muse
Battle Theme: Blumenkranz (Orchestral Arrange) - Hiroyuki Sawano
Battle intro: “Princess, stand aside. I am not above cutting you down if you choose to hinder me.”
Victory: “This is the reality of war. It’s a shame you had to learn this way.”
Defeat: “This is-- I have been underestimating you. Please... Finish it.”
Assist: “Jiaying! ...Whew, that was a close call. Be on alert.”
Taunt: “Just as expected, you’re nothing more than a puppet of that usurper you call a father.”
Reacting to Taunt: “I’ll shut that insolent mouth of yours forever.”
Tie: “Well, Lady Sima, as enlightening as this has been, I must bid you farewell. Don’t worry, we’ll finish this someday.”
Perfect Victory: “You’re a disgrace, and you dared to stand against the Cao? Men, see that the princess is made comfortable.”
☭ (Bro feels man)
Send ☭ for a vs. battle quote to your muse
Battle Theme: A Man by His Word - Massimiliano Foti
Battle intro: “Caihai..? What are you doing? Put that away, immediately.”
Victory: “Start talking, who put you up to this? Any lies will be dealt with harshly; that, I promise.”
Defeat: “Hnng--! You truly are stronger than I ever believed... Was it... all an act..?”
Assist: “Pay attention! How many times have I told you to watch your back?”
Taunt: “Surely that dead father of yours would be disappointed in this performance!”
Reacting to Taunt: “Sinbad... you will pay for those words. Dearly.”
Tie: “Leave. Leave now and I won’t look for you. Get out of my sight!”
Perfect Victory:“I thought you would have known better than to try and take me by surprise. What were you hoping to achieve?”
Zhuo nodded, stepping forward practically on reflex and beginning to unwind the bandages, curious as ever to investigate. “You don’t have to call me that anymore, Lord Sima,” he began quietly, removing the linen and setting it carefully aside as he began his examination of the bruised appendage. “When I return to Wu in September, I won’t be using that name anymore, nor the title that accompanies it. I would prefer that if you were to use a family name, that it were Zhu.”
The entirety of the extremity in question was swollen and purple, a break had almost certainly occurred. However… the severity or location was impossible to tell with this level of swelling. Considering the action, it was likely one of the four bones in the hand proper, but which? “Broken, with a certainty,” he delivered, releasing the injured hand, “I’m sure you’re already aware, but you ought to have that drained off so that it can right itself and heal in a straight line. I suspect that the force was less than crushing, and so it’s probably only cracked, but the pressure from the blood may make healing more difficult, not to mention the potential for a haematoma to form.”
"You’re returning to Wu…?" That came as a surprise, though truthfully, it wasn’t much of one. "I do hope you at least visit from time to time… But if that is what you desire, Lord Zhu, then that is what I will call you." Truthfully, he could not bring himself to hate those from the other factions. They were either there for reasons being family, or for ideals that one place held over the other. Neither were things he could stand, so he stayed out of the war as much as he could.
It was the look on the other’s face that caught his attention, and even if his hand was released, he brought it back closer to his chest, holding it there just in case. “I figured that was the case… and I would have gotten it drained, however it’s not something I can do easily on myself…” He trailed off there, and the meaning was obvious as to why he didn’t. He didn’t trust many of the doctors. Even the state of his own house reflected it… though, none would truly know that. He lowered his gaze for but a moment, and then looked up. “You have been studying to be a doctor, have you not? May I… May I ask that you drain it…? It has to be bandaged a certain way, however, else I’ll keep tearing at the bandages…” Old habits died hard… and he turned his gaze fully away. “If not… I’m… I’m sure I can find a way.”
His old name in the northern dialect brought a smile to Zhuo's lips, however subtle the expression was in the rest of his face. "I should like that very much, Lord Sima," he responded genuinely, "although I fear there are many more who would be happier if I never returned." The amateur physician knew he'd long been in the way of his adoptive brothers; his welcome had more than worn out.
The soon-to-be-former prince was mildly taken aback by the request, but years of training forced composure immediately. Were his habits widely known, or was it the knowledgeable way he had approached the minister? For now, he set his thoughts aside, choosing to focus on what he would need from his kit. "It would be my pleasure to assist you, my lord," Zhuo answered with a short bow, perhaps a little eager for a live specimen, "If you would please follow me, I will retrieve my supplies, and we can begin the procedure somewhere a little more private."
HE adopted a role called: BEING A FATHER so that his CHILD would have something MYTHICAL and infinitely important– a P R O T E C T O R
carefree beach
by Denny Bitte
[Considering the origins of this character, what he’s grown into, and my long, long hiatus, I intend to completely rewrite his backstory. As most of his interactions come with later Wu (Such emperors include: Old Sun Quan, Sun Liang, Sun Hao and anyone in there), this will probably take some time and research, but of course I won’t let it limit my interactions! God knows Koei doesn’t care who was born when lmao]
(( Dear Cao Pi :3 ))
To his Imperial Majesty Cao Zihuan, First Emperor of the Wei Dynasty
When I left Wei two and a half years ago, you made a small request of me, and I would like to begin by apologizing to you for failing to keep my word. That said, I hope to rectify things now with this letter, although I am sure it will only be the first of many.
Fuqin, I miss you dearly. I think often of the temperate weather of the north during the summer months, and the beauty of the frozen landscapes in the winter. Of course, it snows in Jianye as well, but nothing like the blizzards of Luoyang. I remember fondly the time spent learning at your side as a boy, the lessons in military and political strategy are firmly engrained, but most often I draw on what came from observing your interactions. The dignity and pride you wore about yourself… I recall believing you invincible.
I, more than anyone, understand now that no man is invincible. For your sake, and the sake of your people, I urge you to be cautious with your health. You have always been vigilant with regards to the clumsy attempts of saboteurs, but I know you to also push yourself beyond the limits of your health for the sake of your empire. Please, please take care.
I do not know if I will be able to cross the border for a formal visit, as you are surely well aware, tensions continue to run high on both sides. I will monitor the situation and if an opportunity arises, I will be sure to take it. In the meantime, please to not hesitate to write for me. If you have need of my assistance, I will find a way to you, regardless of the measures required.
Please send my regards to Rui and Li; it is doubtful they will be well received, but I do miss them all the same.
Zhu Zhuo submits this letter respectfully, and eagerly anticipates your majesty’s reply.
birb
OHHHHHHHHHH!!!!