The Worst Blog Ever. Of All Time.

I present to you a drama, comedy, horror. This story killed me three times.

"for the first time"

I am howling with laughter and I cannot tell my children why

This is all the more horrifying and hilarious because the most recent episode of QI (21x08, "U Animals") had a whole bit about jellyfish stings, and scientists apparently recommend seawater as the best immediate anodyne. Which is of course right there. Unlike human wee.

When I was in the hospital, they gave me a big bracelet that said ALLERGY, but like. I'm allergic to bees. Were they going to prescribe me bees in there.

So there's a medication called hyaluronidase. It's used to make other medications absorb better, because it makes the cell wall more permeable.

One common usage is to make local anesthetic more effective during surgery, for instance. It's used in a number of injected medications.

Bee stings contain an enzyme very similar to this medication, so sometimes, people with bee allergies have an allergic reaction to hyaluronidase.

This is called cross-reactivity, where your body mistakes something for the thing it's actually allergic to, and has an allergic reaction anyway. For instance, sometimes people with latex allergies also are allergic to bananas and other fruits. They don't actually contain latex, but there are some similar proteins.

Apparently, hyraluronidase used in humans is derived from one of four sources: sheep testicles, cow testicles, cow testicles again, and GMO hamster ovaries.

tl;dr: They won't inject you with bees, but they might inject you with purified cow testicle juice, and your body might say 'eh, cow balls are BASICALLY bees' and try to kill you anyway.

The world is full of such beauty and wonder. Thank you for that sentence.

Also printing up a set of "over-commitment to the bit" for when they ask about my greatest weakness.

Flooflers

WORTH SOUND

Knowledge is empowering

you can literally get gender changers for like $3

I don’t understand Godzilla Vs Kong.”who wins an alligator or a monkey” alligator every time. “What if they were both big” what if you had sense. You would see

You don’t get it Jame. The monkey is substantially smaller than the Empire State Building and the alligator can unleash nuclear power blasts

Actually if any of you had bothered to watch the Star Trek episode "Arena" you'd know that a monkey can totally defeat an alligator so long as the monkey has a rudimentary understanding of how to make a gun

now see i think that nuclear power blasts are slightly stronger than a rudimentary understanding of how to make a gun

Not my meme but relevant cause yeah

thinking about that kakapo egg that got crushed but the conservation team patched it up and it survived

life will persist against all odds

For those who don’t follow kakapo conservation, they are critically endangered parrots who only breed on years where the rimu tree they rely on meet a certain threshold of fruit production. One breeding season in 4 years can be typical, and about half of all eggs laid by kakapo are infertile (they still aren’t completely certain why, it could be a recent population bottleneck) so each fertile egg is worth its weight in gold.

This was one of only 5 fertile eggs laid on the Whenua Hou island population in the 2014 breeding season and it got crushed by its mother on accident. It was mended with glue and tape and incubated by the rangers until hatching.

At 150 days old kakapo chicks are officially added to the population total and given a unique name, until then they are given their mother’s name and a number for birth order laid in the clutch. This chick was known as Lisa-one before officially being given the name Ruapuke by local indigenous Ngai Tahu people.Here he is grown up:

It’s sad when a species is so rare we know them all individually but at the same time I love that you can point at this one bird and say oh that’s Ruapuke, his mom sat on him too hard

He looks very proud

archers gloves vs digital artist gloves being opposite of one another

Much like how archers and digital artists are mortal enemies

Behold, the digital artchery glove!

….but Wait…

…….!!!

FUCKA YOUUU!!!!!

Ok but wgat if we held hands…..

and we both had carpal tunnel syndrome 😳

not carpal tunnel syndrome 😫

I love that this post doesn't include the actual text of his tweet, just his impending presence. This is the visual equivalent of a scare chord.

listen I love Pokemon but this person is SO right

Also, let us not forget, Henry Kissinger died. I understand that 2023 was generally a shitshow in a lot of ways, but Henry Kissinger very much did die.