Bee Enthusiast

this is so fucking funny. im going to say "here come the locusts" everytime something goes wrong now

everyone shut the fuck up and look at lil nas x and the wiggles

i hate when top wildlife predators are just lil babies teeny tiny babies

. that is a serial killer

gay people. i've made cornbread

"i don't know why i find this so funny," it is because of your jovial soul and jokester's disposition, my boy! (quaffs ale) (claps you on the back too hard)

moobs (man boobs) and woobs (woman boobs) lol 👍

and nonbinary boobs would be... no..... most surely not

jousting is the most human thing ever invented, to me. lets ride on the back of horses and hit eachother with sticks as hard as we can for sport. i think that thought process is what the human spirit is all about

"lol chihuahua liker" i cannot imagine having dislike in your heart for such a small creature. sorry if you've been exposed to untrained and/or overstimulated chihuahuas but basically they're little and sometimes they get cold so you have to give them sweaters

when I was a kid you had to do the charlie the unicorn voice whether you liked it or not. you had to say candy mountain charlieeee in the voice. not like these days

No literally standing under a hot shower being covered every inch in hot water nothing else matters

my mom purposely overpaid her credit card bill by 1 cent so every month they send her a letter that says they owe her 1 cent and it costs them a dollar to send the letter plus the paper. she is costing corporations money 👍

winter is awesome because every night somewhere between the hours of 6 and 8 pm you will feel the worst you’ve ever felt in your life

google maps distance to nearest tim hortons

bicycle: 30h 23m

walk: 80h 30m

bus: 40h 20m

die and be reborn in the store: 20h 33m

car: 5 minutes

"never trust how you feel abt ur life after 9pm" is a spring & summer & fall rule. for winter it's never trust how u feel abt ur life after 4pm