In today’s episode of By Grabthar’s Hammer, What A Podcast, we’re talking Galaxy Quest, movies about actors playing actors, and common acting archetypes. We’re joined by thespian and The Noise FM bass player Barry Kidd!
Source: podbean.com
Did it really take us this long to realize Three Amigos and Galaxy Quest are the same movie?
Yep!
New episode of By Grabthar’s Hammer, What A Podcast on Thursday!
Source: youtube.com
Alex Becomes an Honorary Export for a Month
The Noise FM is cracking down on writing and recording for our new record. We'll have more information, tour dates, and videos coming in the following weeks, as well as info on how one lucky fan can get their hands on Austin's old mattress.
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But today's big news is about our Chicago friends Archie Powell & The Exports.
AP & E have just released a brand new music video (see below) and will be heading out for a month-long tour in support of their great new album, "Great Ideas In Action."
And guess what? I'll be joining the band for the duration of their tour on keyboard and lead guitar. We'll be hitting the east coast and the beautiful country of CANADAAAAA! We're not sure if Canada has the internet yet, but if they do, you can be sure I'll be sending updates from the road.
Tour dates with Archie Powell & The Exports can be found on archiepowell.com
Music video shoot Saturday, April 7! Pillow fight!
The Noise FM recently performed a live set and interview on Chicago's Vocalo.org 89.5FM. Vocalo.org hosts a fantastic radio show that spotlights independent bands, and they also house an incredible studio right on Navy Pier. We did our best to burn that sucker down. We played some golden oldies and a couple new jams, as well as chatted it up with host Jesse Menendez who apparently knows more about our band than we do. Seriously, this guy did his Noise FM research.
If you missed the live airing, you can now hear the podcast in its entirety right HERE. It almost sounds like we knew what we were doing.
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Though it hasn't been recognized as a federal holiday just yet, this Saturday, April 7 is INTERNATIONAL PILLOW FIGHT DAY!
Chicago is doing its part for the world community by hosting a pillow fight downtown at the plaza between Tribune Tower and Consulate of Brazil (Michigan & Water streets).
The event lasts from 2pm - 5pm, or until everyone has been knocked unconscious.
The Noise FM will be using the Pillow Fight as a background for a new music video! Won't you join us?? Bring some pillows and beat us to a comfortable, down-filled pulp. We'll be setting up prior to the event start so feel free to come hang out.
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Though The Noise FM is taking a bit of time off to work on new material, we're still performing with Hawley Shoffner. On Friday, April 6, we join our good friends State & Madison for a CD Release show at Beat Kitchen in Chicago. We take the stage at 7:30pm. This will sell out, so we hope you can make it!
SXSW 2012 Tour Recap
Well, folks, it wasn’t a pretty sight, but The Boyz of Noize managed to survive another trek to South By Southwest. This time around we were joined by our friends in Archie Powell & The Exports for the entire tour. And just to make things more interesting, the seven of us agreed to double up on equipment and all hop into our new van, recently christened Topanga.
7 dudes and 1 Topanga.
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To say we broke Topanga in during her inaugural voyage would be an understatement. She was beaten and battered as we man-handled her throughout the Midwest. We put her through her paces every chance we could, driving over curbs and medians and cramming as many passengers into her rear as seating would allow. And she gave as good as she got. Alas, the journey ultimately became too much for Topanga and she left us blue-balled with a frayed S-belt* and broken tension rod just outside of Marion, Arkansas, on our return trip home. Friends, there are worse places than Marion, Arkansas, to be stuck for an entire afternoon. We just can’t think of any.
*S-belt is short for serpentine belt, which we learned from Google. 7 dudes, and not a single one knew a thing about vehicles.
We’re currently working on a full-length book called “Mechanics for Moron Musicians.” It’s just 1-page long and has the phone number for Triple AAA.
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25 hours after departing Austin, Texas, we returned home to Chicago with nothing but fond memories of the tour and a possible case of Hep C.
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The tour began on Friday, March 9 with a stop in Columbia, Missouri, at The Bridge. The first thing that greeted us was a mural of a monster holding what is probably supposed to be a guitar. Instead, it looks kind of like a giant wrench dick. Naturally we dubbed the creature “Wrenchdick.”
RJ and Wrenchdick!
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The show at The Bridge rocked, and we’re not the only ones who thought so. From Columbia’s Vox Magazine:
“…this energetic three-piece escapes the common confines of traditional indie music and explores original chord progressions and melodies. The bassist didn’t just mirror the guitarist’s notes, but instead played thirds and fifths to enhance their sound. Although a little less energetic than their predecessors [Archie Powell & The Exports], the band continued the hard rocking theme of the evening…”
Archie draws a picture of a penis playing a guitar on a blackboard in a children's classroom.
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By day #2, our bassist Barry was getting into the swing of things. Barry was the true MVP of the trip having gotten the call to fill in on bass for us the night before we left on tour. He learned most of the songs in the van en route to shows. Friends, if you ever find yourself stranded on a desert island and can only choose one bass player to tour with you for 10 days (it’s a big island), you could do much worse than hire Barry. And by “hire” we mean ask him to use all of his vacation days at work to tour for no money.
Alex, Austin, Barry. By day #2 we were already looking good.
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In addition to AP&E, we met up with our friends The Photo Atlas for a massive show at The Riot Room in Kansas City, Missouri on March 10. Kansas City acts Capybara, Fullbloods, and Everyday/Everynight rounded out the bill. It was a spectacular show made all the more memorable by Alex’s brutal stage fall. If anyone out there has pictures or video, we’d love to see it, because we’re still trying to pinpoint at exactly which moment Alex got his concussion.
New T-shirts featuring our very own Mr. Budget were a big hit with fans and mom!
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We spent the entire afternoon on Sunday, March 11, roaming the mean streets of Lawrence, Kansas, prior to our homecoming show at Replay. In addition to consuming some delicious margs at the new Lawrence establishment Tapas Mexican (which incidentally does not serve tapas, and didn’t appear to be a Mexican restaurant), we also conducted an interview with influential culture blog The Larryville Chronicles.
Here’s an excerpt:
Chip: Your music is pretty decent, though I preferred your earlier work in Fort Scott's Pond Monkeys. However, I’m primarily interested in your Boy Meets World erotic-fan-fiction. How did you guys get into this and can you give us a preview of future installments?
Alex: How can you watch Topanga on TV and NOT want to write erotica. The only thing surprising about this book is that it took so long for someone to get around to writing it. Our goal was to tell the whole story in 140-character tweets. Our book is a collection of those tweets along with a handful of unreleased material. This whole trip is a promotional tour for our book of Boy Meets World erotica. It’s been wildly successful. We’re selling them for only $5 a pop, and so far we’ve sold one to our roommate.
Richard: What can we expect from a Noise FM show at the Replay very late on a Sunday night? Will the band be absolutely blitzed on PBR prior to taking the stage?
Alex: I’ll be honest, there’s a 75% chance we’re not going to end up performing.
Austin: I just recorded all our songs onto a cassette tape. We’re planning to just play the tape over the PA system while we sleep in the van. We figure Replay still has a cassette player hooked up.
Boy Meets World Erotic Fan Fiction! It's more weird-bad than weird-good.
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On Monday, March 12, we performed with AP & E, The Photo Atlas and Hawley at our favorite Wichita music venue, Rock Island Live. As far as we can tell, it’s also the only Wichita music venue. The night quickly turned rowdy when all the bands hit up Mort’s Cigar Bar afterwards for half-price martinis and some stogies.
RJ and Austin woo the ladies of Wichita.
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With Topanga smelling like sweat, feet and lingering cigar stench, we traveled onward to Dallas for a show at Tradewinds Social Club. Proudly calling itself a dive bar “where good FREINDS meet,” Tradewinds Social Club is a believer in the power of truthful advertising. The bar was indeed a dive, and we’ll be damned if not every person in attendance was either freindly or dyslexic. Unbeholden to any sort of sanitary or safety restrictions, Tradewinds Social Club shouldn’t theoretically exist, but it is working hard to earn every last one of its 4.5 stars on Yelp.
When life hands you a box of tampons, make a tampon keyboard! Ryan of Archie Powell & The Exports
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We spent the afternoon of March 14 conquering Six Flags Over Texas. We proudly arrived in our 15-passenger heavily tinted white Dodge van, and we left without abducting a single child. Success.
Life on the road can be hard. Especially when it's too early in the season to remove the pool cover.
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The Noise FM had 3 shows at SXSW in Austin, Texas, this year, and one with Alex and Austin backing Hawley Shoffner. The first took place at Wahoo’s Fish Tacos which is now our favorite fish taco restaurant in the world. We were given all the free margs we could drink, and fish tacos were served up all night. The show was nutty, as evidenced by the following video of Archie Powell and RJ joining us during a cover of ELO’s “Don’t Bring Me Down.”
(Thanks to Doomsday Robot and Venomous Media for the video!)
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Due to time constraints and a soundman that decided not to show up for our 2nd show at the Music Gorilla showcase at Fuel, we played three of our noisiest Noise songs before tearing down the place and heading out. A short set, but damn if it wasn’t a good time.
Picture pretty much sums up SXSW.
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We ended our trip with a blow-out at The Dizzy Rooster on 6th Street for the Red Gorilla Fest. It was Saturday, St. Patrick’s Day, and a late show, which is the ultimate trifecta for a memorable SXSW event. The crowd was raging, and we were feeling frisky. Things got messy. Again, Archie and RJ joined us for ELO, but this time, Archie couldn’t quite make it through the entire song without stumbling off in search of a bathroom.
(Thanks to Casey for the rad video!)
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Make sure to check out ChicagoTunes.net for a great review of our tour kick off show in Chicago on March 3 at The Township. It was a night to remember, and we'll be rocking Chicago again on March 30 at Quenchers along with The Photo Atlas and Hemmingbirds.
Spring 2012 Tour Dates
We've somehow managed to convince a bunch of venues to let us come back and play. So without further ado we present: The Arab Spring 2012 Tour!
We're kicking things off on Saturday, March 3rd with a show in Chicago at Township (formerly Pancho's). Our tourmates Archie Powell & The Exports will be rocking as well as a cool band called Rodeo Ruby Love. We play right at 10pm. Don't be silly, just come to the show.
Along with AP & The Exports, we will make our triumphant return to Columbia, Missouri on Friday, March 9, for our first performance at The Bridge. We don't know much about this new venue, but we have a feeling we're gonna burn that bridge to the ground. Facebook event here.
Get ready to rumble. On Saturday, March 10, The Boyz of Noize return to Kansas City for the first time since last July. Last time we were in KC, The Photo Atlas caused a riot, so we decided to have them back for a show! Kansas City's Fullbloods and AP & E round out the bill. To top it all off, we're playing The Czar Bar, one of our favorite venues. Bring the jelly, cuz we promise to bring the peanut butter! Ages 21+ Facebook event here.
What's that? You're underage and can't get into Czar Bar? Fear not, because we'll be performing an all ages show at KC Indoor Skatepark in Kansas City earlier that very same day! 1pm. Get ready to thrash, skaters!
Oh man. We're coming home. On Sunday, March 11, The Replay Lounge is going to get it in the face. Lawrence, Kansas, get ready for a rocking the likes of which this world has never seen. Dig out your safety goggles and strap on the Kevlar. The Noise FM, The Photo Atlas, Archie Powell & The Exports. You're probably already sweating just thinking about it. Facebook event here.
Things get weird when we stop in Wichita, Kansas. Let's see what happens this time when we hit Rock Island Live on Monday, March 12 with Archie Powell & The E's, Photo Atlas and Hawley. Facebook event here.
Tradewinds Social Club in Dallas, Texas, claims it's the best dive bar in Texas. According to its website, it's also "The place where good 'freinds' meet!" Poor spelling is nothing to laugh about, so on Tuesday, March 13, The Noise FM and Archie Powell & The Exports are gonna knock some sense into these fools. Let's go for a dive!
Hide your kids! On Wednesday, March 14, The Noise FM, The Photo Atlas, and Archie Powell & The Exports invade Six Flags Over Texas! This time around, we're burning all six flags to the ground!
We like fish, and we love tacos, so we're doubly pumped to be performing at Wahoo's Fish Tacos on Thursday, March 15 in Austin, Texas! 9pm!
Let's start your afternoon right with a performance at Fuel for the Musica Gorilla fest in Austin, Texas on Saturday, March 17. 1pm sharp.
Later that same day we'll be rocking the Red Gorilla Music Festival at The Dizzy Rooster on 6th Street, smack dab in the middle of SXSW in Austin, Texas on March 17. 9pm. Primetime for showtime!
Get your radios tuned -- we're taking over Vocalo.org 89.5 in Chicago on Wednesday, March 28! Listen live or stream it online at 8pm. We'll be doing an interview and performance, and then probably taking over the station Airheads-style.
We're aiming for you Ames, Iowa! We join Gold Motel on Thursday, April 5, at The M-Shop. Let's get it on!
Stay tuned -- we have many more shows in the works!
A Holiday Greeting Letter From The Noise FM Family
Greetings to all of our closest friends, family, roadies and groupies (specifically the girl in Iowa City!),
We hope the holidays find you and your family in great health! Can you believe another year has come and gone?? How the time seems to fly! It has been ages since we last spoke, so we know how anxious you must be to hear about our year! Rest assured, it has been a banner year for the boys of noise! The wonderful opportunities we have been blessed with are truly humbling, and we have no doubt that our year was filled with many more riches than yours!
[caption id="attachment_503" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Happy Holidays from Mr. Budget, Alex and Austin (from left to right)"][/caption]
Once again our tour schedule was a bit limited due to Oliver’s probationary restrictions, but we were able to make the best of it. When life hands you lemons!
In March we made our annual journey down to Texas for the South By Southwest Music festival. Over three days we played 5 shows -- 2 of which were absolutely amazing, 2 we don’t remember, and 1 that Austin refers to as “The worst show we have ever played. Ever.” Needless to say, the crowd was not clamoring for a copy of our record after that show!
[caption id="attachment_371" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Alex struggling through the really bad show."][/caption]
As you probably guessed, we met up with some of our celebrity friends while in Texas. Alex hosted an impromptu jam session with Billy Zane and Ernie Hudson, and Austin spent most of his time chatting with that bloated white guy with the dreadlocks from that band from the 90s. You know, what’s his name? The guy who dated Courtney Cox. Yeah, you know who we’re talking about.
[caption id="attachment_369" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Can you find Austin in this photo?"][/caption]
In May the band performed at a Battle of the Bands hosted by the excellent people at Tribeca Flashpoint Academy. We really worked hard to make it a special event! We lost!
Amidst a record-breaking heat wave, The Noise FM toured the Midwest throughout July with our friends in The Photo Atlas. Contrary to what you may have heard, Oliver suffered only a minor heat-stroke, and the doctors say the carbon monoxide poisoning from sleeping in the back of the van only made his condition worse! But don’t worry -- we have since replaced the batteries in both of the van’s carbon detectors!
[caption id="attachment_459" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Photo Atlas & Noise FM"][/caption]
That’s right, we have still been driving that ol’ clunker of a van around! She looks and sounds like she’s been to hell and back (we did play in Muncie, Indiana!), but she’s a trooper. Nothing can stop her, not even the large deer Austin plowed through on our way to Minneapolis! The road looked like a slaughter house, but the van just kept on humming!
[caption id="attachment_462" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Prior to the van explosion."][/caption]
During a tour in July we blew out two tires and ruptured the fuel tank. As gas pooled up on the shoulder of Highway 70, Oliver exited the van with a lit cigarette in hand. You would have loved the fireworks display! Mom endearingly refers to the van as a “deathtrap” which we’ve adopted as its official name. We recently redecorated Deathtrap’s exterior by shearing off the door handle upside a telephone pole! Good luck trying to get out of this van in an emergency!
[caption id="attachment_504" align="aligncenter" width="225" caption="The new and improved door handle on Deathtrap"][/caption]
The band received all sorts of positive press coverage this year including stellar reviews of the “Enclave” EP. Bradley Hartsell of In Your Speakers wrote “There’s a lack of substance to [The Noise FM] that has to be their biggest drawback… Though the band has achieved success, it’s kind of hard to see why.” Bradley sure is a straight-shooter!
Not to be outdone, David C. Eldredge of Illionis Entertainer wondered what would happen “If only these six originals were a bit more interesting, and a tad less repetitive…” Come on, David! Let's see you try to write six songs! All in all, people have really enjoyed our music since moving up to the big city!
Austin has stayed busy this year with all of his usual hobbies! And after being let go from his part-time job at Gap, he’s had more time than ever to concentrate on his readings. He’s been tearing through graphic novels, and though there are a lot of pictures in them, we’re glad to see he’s reading novels and not just comic books anymore! Austin also learned how to transfer phone calls as a receptionist at his new job. And just the other day he came up with a name for a band he would like to start someday: Skull Skin. It's been a productive year for Austin!
Alex had a 7-day free trial membership to a gym. He really loved the facilities but ultimately decided against joining. It would have been a big commitment, and he didn’t like the idea of making monthly payments without knowing for certain that he would get his money’s worth. It’s something to think about in the future though!
Oliver celebrated another birthday this year! And he has almost earned tenure with his job at Jimmy John's!
Mr. Budget has really taken to his new life in Chicago, and his Twitter (@MrBudgetIsACat) has been blowing up in popularity! He really is just the sweetest cat ever. If only he didn’t throw up so often on Alex’s bed. He's also put on quite a bit of weight. He doesn’t get outside as much these days what with being in a city and all. Still, Mr. Budget has been an absolute blessing to this family!
[caption id="attachment_505" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Mr. Budget is doing great!"][/caption]
We don’t need to tell you again how wonderful a year it has been for The Noise FM! But we will! There is no way things could have possibly gone any better for the band or in our personal lives! We would love to hear back from you! If you insist on sending a gift, we absolutely adore cash, turtles and Kohl’s gift cards.
Happy holidays!
-The Noise FM
1st Annual Noise For Toys Chicago!
We are very excited to be a part of the first Noise For Toys benefit concert to be held in Chicago this Friday, December 16 at The Beat Kitchen. All proceeds at the door will go to the Chicagoland Toys For Toys organization. That means we're giving lots of toys to lots of kids.
We're going all out to make this a special event. Expect holiday decorations, an ugly sweater contest, lots of Christmas songs, a Santa Clause photobooth and ridiculous amounts of egg nog. Seriously guys, there is going to be so much egg nog. I'm getting sick just thinking about it. You realize how many calories and grams of saturated fat are in one tablespoon of egg nog? It's like mainlining a Cinnabon. It's awesome.
Doors are at 8:30pm and the show starts at 9. We'll be taking the stage 2nd in the lineup at 9:30pm, so you best be there with bells on. Tickets are $10 or only $5 with the donation of an unopened toy -- "unopened" being the operative word. C'mon guys, don't be bringing some janky ass stuffed animal that's been sitting in storage for the last 7 years. That won't fly this time. Kids these days expect good shit. Even the poor ones.
Here's a Noise FM interview with The Five Three Six previewing the event: http://www.thefivethreesix.com/post/14132114852/event-noise-for-toys-featuring-the-noise-fm
We'll also be hitting up Fearless Radio tomorrow at 6pm for an interview and possible acoustic performance. Tune in as we discuss racism in America, the plight of Canadian immigrants, and Ernie Hudson movies (chief among them being "Congo*".)
Leading up to this special event we have collaborated with the other bands on the bill (Archie Powell & The Exports, State & Madison, and The Scissors) in a series of award-winning videos. They can be viewed in their entirety below (we're in Part 2):
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This past weekend we returned home to host the 3rd Annual Noise For Toys in Lawrence, Kansas. Our friends in Cowboy Indian Bear, Making Movies, Hawley Shoffner and Team Bear Club joined the bill. It was a wild night, and we're pretty sure we saw a couple of concert goers leaving in body bags. We had a wonderful time and received lots of positive press leading up to the event. Check it all out below:
- I Heart Local Music: Preview and interview and Photos from the event
- The Larryville Chronicles: http://larryvillechronicles.blogspot.com/2011/12/scenester-pick-and-worthy-cause-of-day.html
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In bittersweet news, Noise For Toys in Chicago will be Oliver's last performance with us on bass. We wish we had something exciting to say like Oliver had been drafted into the NBA, or we were shipping him off to rehab. Sadly, he's just going back to school. He has been an incredible asset to this band, a good friend, and a wonderful presence in the back of the tour van. We wish him all the best in the future.
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Final Shows of 2011! Chicago, Lawrence, St. Louis, Iowa City!
Austin just had a doctor's appointment. His blood level is 78% gravy, and his vital signs indicate that he has been dead for the past 2 days. We'll chalk it up as another successful Thanksgiving!
As if the holiday season isn't enough of a reason to be in high spirits, The Noise FM has announced a handful of special shows to finish out 2011. We're going to be playing several new songs from an upcoming release as well as a few Christmas classics. We pulled some strings and Santa Clause is scheduled to make an appearance at select shows.
Mark you calendars, folks. These are going to big ones.
Friday, December 9
The Firebird in St. Louis, MO - details to come
Saturday, December 10
3rd Annual Noise For Toys in Lawrence, KS!
W/ Cowboy Indian Bear, Making Movies, Team Bear Club
@ The Bottleneck
ALL AGES
Wear your ugliest holiday sweater!
Admission is only $3 with the donation of an unopened toy for Douglas County Toys For Tots
Facebook event here: http://www.facebook.com/events/299154433446365/
Sunday, December 11
Gabe's in Iowa City
W/ Aulos, Caterwaulla and Followed By Ghosts
Facebook event here: http://www.facebook.com/events/253508048041215/
Friday, December 16
Noise For Toys in Chicago!
W/ Archie Powell & The Exports, State and Madison, The Scissors
@ Beat Kitchen
Ages 17+
Only $5 admission with the donation of an unopened toy! $10 otherwise
Facebook event here: http://www.facebook.com/events/286419761381227/
On Wednesday, December 14, the Noise Boys will be broadcasting live from Fearless Radio. Tune in at 6pm. http://fearlessradio.com/
November 12 at Sub T!
Winter's a-brewin,' but that won't stop us from warming up your face with a fistful of rock!
On Saturday, November 12, we're breaking loose from the studio where we've been holed up working on tasty tunes. Join us as we return to Sub T in Chicago for the release of Aktar Aktar's latest record. This will be a big one folks, and we suggest you get your tickets early from Betta Promotions: https://fanfound.com/bettapromotions/secure/ Order now and tickets are only $6!!!
November 12
Subterranean
2011 W North Ave. Chicago, IL 60674
8:00pm 17+
mustaches for everyone!!!
November 11 has the Noize Boys returning to the bustling metropolis of Muncie, Indiana. The name of the venue is Be Here Now, and that's what we're telling you to do (on November 11). Won't you join?
Big shows are in the works including stops in St. Louis, Iowa City and a homecoming show in Lawrence, Kansas. Details to follow.
#OccupyNoiseFM
Show at Sub T, Chicago on Friday, Sept. 23
Get yer' goggles on!
We're coming out of a self-imposed exile for one spectacular show in September. We hope you can join us this Friday, September 23 at Sub T in Chicago. The Noise FM is kicking things off promptly at 8:00pm, followed by Stepdad, Carbon Tigers and our friends in Blane Fonda.
Ages 17+, $10
This is one show not to be missed. (Note: we say that about every show)
We've been hard at work writing and recording a new record. Winter tour dates and more information about the new album will be announced in the coming weeks, as well as a raffle. Your prize will be Oliver.
In the meantime, make sure you're staying up to date with our project with the lovely Hawley Shoffner. We've been hard at work recording new material for follow-up to her critically acclaimed debut, "Hawley."
Watch out! We just bought a bottle of sriracha hot sauce!
Roommate Wanted - Your Chance to Live With The Noise FM!
We've been looking for a roommate to move in September 1. Despite our enticing ad on Craigslist, we've had trouble finding takers. You think you have what it takes to live with us???
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$530 - 1 roommate wanted for awesome house near California Blue Line (Logan Square)
Date: 2011-08-21, 8:23PM CDT
We have a house in Logan Square just off of Logan Blvd & California, 3 blocks from California Blue Line Stop (5 minute walk; 22 minutes via wheelchair). Recently renovated in a beautiful, safe, residential neighborhood.
It's probably the coolest house you'll come across in your quest to find a place to live before September 1. And we might be two of the coolest guys you'll ever meet. There is also a cat living here named Mr. Budget. He doesn't seem to mind us living with him, and we doubt he'll object to new roommates moving in. Mr. Budget is pretty tech savvy and he has his own twitter (@mrbudgetisacat).
Disclaimer #1: We're clean freaks. Like, we actually vacuum the house multiple times a week. You're expected to put your dirty dishes in the tiny dish washer we have, or else Mr. Budget will shit on your bed.
This amazing house that we speak of is a one-story ranch-style home with 3 bedrooms, two full baths, a nice living room and a chef-friendly kitchen. There's also a huge basement with a washer and dryer, and one of us is moving down there, so we have two empty bedrooms upstairs. The bedrooms have closets (spacious enough for at least 4 human cadavers), windows, and working light bulbs. The floors are tile and some sort of synthetic composite designed to look like wood, but honestly, it's not fooling anyone.
Disclaimer #2: We play in a band. But we're actually pretty decent and we tour a lot. We play dancey indie-rock, so consider that before inquiring about the house. The back 3rd of the basement serves as a practice space. Yes, we practice here several times a week, but we keep the volume at a reasonable level and will work around your schedule. If you're a musician and/or don't mind living with musicians, this will be like living in a dream. A god damn dream, we tell ya!
We're looking for 1 person, guy or girl or something in between, 20s. If you're into music, movies, good beer, whiskey, books, sci-fi, videogames and all of that other hipster jib jab, have we got a place for you.
We've set up a temporary e-mail account that you can reach us at: pond-monkey [@] excite.com. Contact us with some info about yourself and we'll show you the place. When you're on your deathbed, you'll look back on this as the best decision you ever made.
Rent will be $530 + utilities per person, but our parents came to visit a few months ago, and our mom said this place is "priceless."
Cute Boys With Cats
Did we mention that Austin and Mr. Budget were featured on the world-famous blog Cute Boys With Cats last month? Well, they were. It was a big deal for Austin, but Mr. Budget didn't seem that impressed. Remember, you can keep up to date with Mr. Budget via his grammatically challenged Twitter here: http://www.twitter.com/mrbudgetisacat
Mr. Budget taking Austin for a walk.
Hawley Shoffner CD Release Show
Happy Sunday, loyal readers!
For those of you in the know, you're already aware that Alex and Austin make up the rhythm section for indie-folk-rock-pop-multi-hyphenate musician Hawley Shoffner. After months of writing and recording, Hawley will be releasing her debut album (the absurdly titled "Hawley") on Friday, August 19. The milestone will be marked with a CD Release show at Schuba's in Chicago along with Hotel Ahead, Republic of Lights, and Audiences. Show at 9:00pm. 18+.
We've already checked your calendar, and it looks like you have August 19 wide open. We look forward to seeing you there!
The Facebook Event for Hawley Shoffner's CD Release show:
Hawley's Myspace Page where you can hear a couple of tunes:
If you can't wait any longer to get your hands on Hawley, you can buy the record now and have it shipped! You can have it shipped to you, or your neighbor, or probably even somewhere overseas -- it doesn't matter! And it will be delivered by a genuine postal worker!!! http://www.etsy.com/listing/79234914/hawley-debut-cd
We've worked long and hard on this record, and we think you'll really dig it. The sounds run the gamut from little ukulele ditties and piano ballads to folk songs and balls-out garage rockers. Get ready, America, because Hawley is coming to rip your f***ing eyes out.
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With our work done on Hawley's record, we're refocusing our energy back on The Noise FM's next record (tentatively titled "Dog Gone, Baby Gone, 3D"). Tomorrow we're returning to the studio to begin work on a couple of new tunes. Stay tuned to www.twitter.com/thenoisefm to keep abreast of studio updates. Without fail, there are always a couple of celebrity friends who like to swing by the studio while we're working. Our last recording session was interrupted by Ted Dansen bringing by a Domino's pizza and his homemade challah -- a Dansen family recipe. Who knows what's in store for tomorrow?
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We recently made an appearance on the hit Lawrence, Kansas, late-night show, The Not So Late Show. That's right, we were on the TV!
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NEXT SHOW:
Friday, September 23
Sub T
Chicago, Illinois
Blane Fonda CD Release Show
8:00pm
Is It Hot Enough For Ya, Huh???
Tour Update #3: Rocky Mountain High
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Day 11: Road 34, Fort Collins, CO 7/16/11
Man, it’s a long drive from Lawrence to Fort Collins. With Oliver in a coma in the back of the van, Austin and Alex passed time with more movies, Seinfeld Season 7, and Patrick Warburton’s short-lived live-action version of The Tick.
But first up was the Redbox pick of the day, “Meet The Fockers.” We had such high hopes for the latest installment in the Fockers saga, but sadly, it was focking terrible.
[caption id="attachment_457" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="We made it to Colorado!"][/caption]
We arrived at Road 34 in the hip city of Fort Collins just as Oliver awoke from his 11 hour slumber. Even after pointing out the snow-capped mountain range sitting on the horizon, Oliver was convinced we were still in Lawrence, Kansas.
[caption id="attachment_456" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Do NOT order the Pleather Jacket sandwich at Road 34 in Fort Collins, Colorado. Just don't do it, stupid."][/caption]
Road 34 has an eclectic menu of sandwiches, all of which are fantastic. Austin and Alex split two sandwiches including one called the Pleather Jacket that came smothered in face-melting hot-wing sauce and bleu cheese. It did a number on us (a number 2, if you know what we mean!) and somewhat hampered an otherwise flawless Noise FM performance. Common Anomaly from Fort Collins played a danceable set of rock next, and Photo Atlas finished out the night.
[caption id="attachment_455" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="A stall with a working lock elevates an otherwise sub-par restroom at Road 34 to 3 toilet paper rolls in our review."][/caption]
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Day 12: Hi-Dive, Denver, CO 7/17/11
A Colorado chain of burrito joints called Illegal Pete’s hosts the “Starving Artist” program. We're always starving, but it's debateable if we qualify as "artists." Regardless, we contacted Illegal Pete's ahead of time and were given vouchers for free food. Illegal Pete’s is like a Chipotle without any sort of sanitary regulations or standard portion sizes. And it's delicious. Alex ordered the Big Fish Burrito which is a burrito roughly the size of our van. Austin had the shredded beef tacos. Oliver ordered a burrito bowl because he likes his burritos to not be burritos.
With Bill from The Photo Atlas as our guide, we took in the sights and sounds of downtown Denver. It was hot.
[caption id="attachment_458" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Is Denver the capital of Colorado? We're not sure. This might be the capitol building."][/caption]
The final show of the "Too Hot To Tour Tour 2011" stormed the Hi-Dive in Denver. Common Anomaly kicked off the night followed by The Noise FM and a scorching set from The Photo Atlas who were joined by all of the bands onstage during their last song.
[caption id="attachment_460" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="A walking contradiction, Austin sports his Wolverine attire while sipping a vanilla martini."][/caption]
We finished off the night with late-night corn dogs, quesadillas, and indigestion at the bar next door.
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Day 13-14: The Long Road Home
In an attempt to beat the traffic of central Kansas, we departed Denver bright and early. An otherwise smooth trip was horribly tarnished by a blown tire and ruptured fuel tank as we entered Kansas. Alex was driving when the left rear tire burst. His instincts honed to perfection by years of life on the road and natural evolution, he was able to maneuver the unwieldy van to the center median on Highway 70. Gas fumes in the air and heavy traffic speeding by, Austin and Alex darted to safety. As we watched in horror, Oliver emerged slowly from the van, lit cigarette in hand, unaware of the leaking gasoline. While we were momentarily tempted to see what might happen, we decided to warn him.
[caption id="attachment_462" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Taking in the beautiful scenery of central Kansas."][/caption]
After 5 hours, $413.12 in repairs, assistance from a highway patrolman, firefighters and a tow truck, and more time spent in Grainfield, Kansas, than anyone should ever have to spend, we were on our way home.
We arrived in Chicago after 4,854 miles on the road and $1,187.66 spent on gasoline.
Without a doubt this has been the most fun we've had on tour. The Photo Atlas is a fantastic band and great friends. Check them out if you have not done so. A special mention should go to Austin who booked pretty much this whole tour on his own. All of the shows were great, and the new bands we met and performed with were awesome. Thank you to everyone who came out to a show and offered to put us up for the night. If you look hard enough in your backyard, there's a good chance you might find Oliver.
See you this fall!
Tour Journal Update #2: Iowa's Revenge
Day 5: Cause Spirit and Sound Bar, Minneapolis, MN, 7/9/11
We don’t know if it’s just the accent, but the farther north you travel, the nicer people seem to get. Minneapolis rolled out the red carpet for the “Thank God We‘re Out Of Iowa Tour 2011,” and we proceeded to rip it to shreds and light it on fire.
Cause doesn’t just have a big stage and killer sound system; It also hosts an impressive beer selection and dinner menu. Prior to the show Alex ordered up the black bean margherita burger. “It’s the best black bean margherita burger I’ve ever had,” Alex said, before noting that it’s the only black bean margherita burger he’s ever had. Austin had the cobb salad with grilled chicken, of which he says, “It was a good ratio of cobb to salad.” Oliver ordered a Caesar salad for some reason.
[caption id="attachment_427" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Cause's subtle restroom color scheme provides an aesthetically pleasing environment to conduct your "bidness.""][/caption]
We give the Cause bathroom a solid 4 toilet paper rolls in our restroom review. No, it’s nothing flashy, but its monochromatic color scheme is a classy touch, and the stalls are adequately clean.
It’s hard knowing what to expect of a Sunday night show, and needless to say, our expectations were low. Damned if Minneapolis hasn’t turned out to be one of the biggest shows of the tour. Cause was packed to the gills with a rocking crowd, and the energy in the room was palpable. Absolutely palpable, we tell ya!
[caption id="attachment_434" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="A pretty standard mailing list entry."][/caption]
Minneapolis experimental collective Dream Crusher headlined the night while a brutal rainstorm hit outside.
Following the show we headed over to an apartment with new friends for a civil debate over the issue of raising the debt celing. Just kidding, guys! We had a late-night pool party!
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Day 6: The Yacht Club, Iowa City, IL 7/10/11
As the “My God, We’re Back In Iowa Tour 2011” headed back to Iowa, Austin and Alex took turns watching Redbox pick “The Dilemma” on DVD. Austin called the movie a “shit sandwich,” while the movie tempted Alex to drive the van off the nearest bridge. “The Dilemma” is a real laugh riot and we highly recommend you check it out.
A Monday night rock concert in Iowa City spells trouble. Imagine our surprise when the Yacht Club filled up with an eager crowd of dancers. Iowa City natives Safe Words and Attic Party rounded out the bill.
We dined at a funky little place called Mesa Pizza immediately before the show. Mesa is known for it’s unique pizza flavors which include everything from macaroni & cheese pizza to hot dog pizza to gyro pizza. Unsurprisingly, they all taste the same no matter what kind of slice you order. They’re also all equally hard on the stomach. Oliver’s onstage comment about how you might as well just throw the slice of pizza right into the toilet proved apt, if not somewhat inappropriate judging from the disgusted groans coming from the audience.
[caption id="attachment_428" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Don't be fooled by their appearance; both slices of Mesa Pizza are equally deadly as they work their way through your gastrointestinal tract."][/caption]
We are unable to offer a comprehensive review of The Yacht Club’s restroom facilities. The men’s restroom seemed to be inhabited the entire night so we were forced to use the women’s bathroom. If the women’s restroom is any indication, however, you’re looking at a pretty standard set-up. A couple toilets, somewhat grimy sink, slightly sticky floor. No frills. We plan to return to The Yacht Club this fall for a more in-depth review.
Following the concert, The Yacht Club hosted a late-night open mic for stand-up comics. In arguably the most profane display of blatant homophobia, sexist jokes and racism we’ve seen since we last let Austin use our Twitter, Iowa City’s finest comics did their best to offend nearly everyone in the room. Mission accomplished! We left along with the rest of the audience.
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Day 7: Fireside Bowl, Chicago, IL 7/12/11
Seven dudes crammed into a Volkswagon Station Wagon and headed out for a day on the great beach of Lake Michigan. It was a hot one, as they say, and the sun was not kind to a bunch of pasty-white band dudes. The decision to hit up the beach is one that we will regret in the days ahead. Against a backdrop of the Chicago skyline, we also managed to fit in rousing game of soccer before heading home for a cookout. Brats, wieners, veggie burgers, sweet potato fries and potato salad were all on the menu.
[caption id="attachment_429" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="7 men, 13 balls between them."][/caption]
Do not let the name fool you. Fireside Bowl is a bowling alley. It’s also a Chicago music venue with quite a legacy. Joining us for the night were Chicago rockers Moon Furies and Sunken Ships. The crowd was a rowdy one, and we were lucky enough to have our set interrupted by a drunken gentleman known only as Woodsy. Though Woodsy proved to be an entertaining addition to our set, security eventually escorted him out the door.
Video here courtesy of Chicago's Secret Note Productions: Woodsy crashing our set at the 6:30 mark.
Do to an unexpected incident our review of Fireside Bowl’s restroom facilities is incomplete. Our apologies.
[caption id="attachment_430" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="The Photo Atlas. (Insert your own ball joke here.)"][/caption]
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Day 8: The Hub, Cedar Falls, IA 7/13/11
About 3 hours into our drive we realized we had left Oliver asleep in Chicago. A bit of backtracking and we were on our way to Iowa. Again.
[caption id="attachment_432" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="We proceeded to lose Oliver to The Photo Atlas in a vicious game of blackjack. "][/caption]
Prior to the tour, our show in Cedar Falls was the one we were most worried about. Cedar Falls has a good college crowd, but a Wednesday night in the middle of July isn’t the most ideal time to hit a college town. We shouldn’t have worried. The Hub was packed. Photo Atlas put on a stellar show, we did our thing and brought out some dancers, and then Cedar Falls’ own Good Cop Rad Cop (the best band name we’ve heard this tour) finished off the night with an inspired set of cover tunes.
[caption id="attachment_431" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="A bit industrial for our taste, but The Hub restroom earns a remarkable 4 1/2 toilet paper rolls."][/caption]
We found a place to crash with new friends including our friend Ross in the band In Dying Days.
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Day 9: O’Leavers, Omaha, NE 7/14/11
On our way out of Cedar Falls all seven of us in the “Going Rogue Tour 2011” made a pit stop by the Waterloo, Iowa, mall, where our new friend Seth had extended us an offer for 40% off shoes at Journeys. Newly re-shoed and full on Panda Express food court lo-mein, we departed for Omaha.
[caption id="attachment_438" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Waterloo had no idea what hit them. And then Panda Express hit us just as hard right in the stomach."][/caption]
The Redbox pick of the day was “Hallpass.” It was another piece of shit.
O’Leavers is a blast. It’s a divey little bar with a hipster clientele, and in what appears to be some sort of sociological class experiment, it’s juxtaposed against an outdoor sand volleyball court across the parking lot filled with a decidedly more healthy group of patrons. Though both the bar and the volleyball courts are owned by the same people, we can’t imagine that anyone from either group has ever set foot on the other’s territory.
Little Brazil headlined the bill with a rocking set. Oliver somehow managed to get up the nerve to chat with Tim Kasher of the band Cursive who was hanging at the show. After watching a brief but surprisingly hostile battle with a bottle of ranch dressing between Photo Atlas and Little Brazil, we crashed for the night at Danny of Little Brazil’s house.
O’Leaver’s restroom receives two toilet papers rolls in our rating. The men’s restroom is disgusting alright, but it’s a single person room and the door has a working lock. There’s really not much more you can ask for.
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Day 10: The Bottleneck, Lawrence, KS 7/15/11
We departed Omaha early in the morning in order to make a 1:00pm taping of Lawrence’s new talk show, The Not So Late Show. The temperature in Lawrence read 104 degrees, and by the time we finished loading our equipment into the studio, we were soaked with sweat. Consider the fact that we hadn’t slept or bathed in the last couple days and you can imagine that we looked like death. We can’t wait to see how the video footage turns out. We played a new untitled tune, jumped around on the host’s interview desk, and then were politely asked to leave. Stay tuned for broadcast information of our episode.
[caption id="attachment_435" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="We were pretty starstruck by that microphone."][/caption]
Lawrence will always be home to us so it was nice to have an afternoon with friends. We have a fantastic time whenever we play The Bottleneck, and the show was better than we could have expected. The crowd came ready to dance. Lawrence locals Spirit Is The Spirit kicked off the night with a spirited (HA!) set of indie-rock, followed by a killer set from Photo Atlas. Our pals in Quiet Corral ended the night. It was great to see familiar faces and friends, as well as a whole gaggle of people from our hometown of Fort Scott, Kansas.
We love the Bottleneck, don’t get us wrong. But is there a worse restroom in all of Kansas? On a scale of 1 to 5 toilet paper rolls, we award The Bottleneck one empty toilet paper roll. The room should be quarantined and then firebombed.
[caption id="attachment_437" align="aligncenter" width="199" caption="The Bottleneck's restroom."][/caption]