Why Is It Always Me???

This is golden.

uh, you cant sit with us

actually MEGAN i cant sit anywhere. i have

WHEN CHARACTERS WAKE UP IN A HOSPITAL BED AND THEN PROCEED TO RIP OUT THEIR IVS

mom, dad, these are my newborn twins. their names are mom and dad. i named them after you. what do you mean ‘mom’ and ‘dad’ aren’t your real names? what the hell? i already named these kids thanks for telling me now

the first step to any murder is to have fun and be yourself

Kitty massage

Fun fact!  This action is called “snurgling”.

It’s a kitten’s way of stimulating mommy to make milk… some cats never stop doing it and will even snurgle things like fleecy blankets or stuffed animals or your leg/tummy

Snurgle is the dorkiest and cutest word in the world Oh my gosh

snurglesnurglesnurglesnurglesnurglesnurglesnurglesnurglesnurglesnurglesnurglesnurglesnurgle

“Barack obama is that some kind of sauce”

I still can’t believe it was taken down on Instagram because saltine Americans flagged it as racist.

This went viral the night of 2016 elections

Still funny tho.

The holiday season is coming up and if you’re being rude to a retail worker while they’re pulling off a 12+ hour shift cause it’s a holiday, you’re going directly to hell and i’m sending you there myself. 

why my hand shaky

your skeleton is ready to hatch

this is so fucking ominous thank you

ravioli ravioli give me a reason to live

vine 2 better have new stuff but also sequels to all the favorites.  do we get to meet the roommates? did he drop the croissant? will we get to look at all these roosters since we saw all these chickens? how is gavin doing?

My lower back is killing me…

I must confess i still believe….

not to be ladphobic but I think ppl who go for a bit of cheeky nandos in public are disgusting :/ It’s adam and eve not banter with steve

what language is this

The year is 2018. Your bills are on autopay. You just got paid and you still have $1200 from the last check. When you want something, you buy it without moving money around. Your credit cards are paid off. You and your friends have 2 international trips planned and paid for this year. Your parents are in great health and you’re able to help if they need anything. You love your job. Your desired creative career is falling into place and you get to take your little cousins to Six Flags and Universal Studios over the Summer. Your relationships are healthy and supportive. All of the toxic energy from the past 6 years is gone. You going to concerts, eating good across the states and your crib has art and warmth throughout. 2018 is going to be so good to you.

reblogging this for that 2018 good luck

daniel radcliffe: *tries his best to widen his horizons and take on various interesting and different roles*

me: look at the harry potter man go

u guys ever wonder if someone’s using ur pictures to catfish

no some of us are ugly