It’s already been clicked on

you cannot possibly fault me for wanting to read this article about the horniest founding father

me: stutters out fifteen sentence fragments that no-one can make sense of not even me me: you know?

that one friend who knows you better than you: yeah

small child: [absolutely incomprehensible gibberish]

me:

The ability to pin a post would be very cool

why is that last letter in orange

Halloween

IT (2017)

Inflation is honestly the strangest shit. Like someone rn is thinking of getting blown up like a balloon and they’ve got a boner.

i thought this was about economics at first and that second sentence hit me like a freight train

this is… maybe the funniest thing that’s ever happened on television? i’ve never seen someone so thoroughly derail a late night talk show, i could honestly watch cardi b and john mulaney talk for hours

Hey! Another one! kinda awkward because the first one is in my queue and won’t post till sunday! but that’s okay! have this!! it’s about me.

ass may be great but

ASS CANNOT be used to prove triangles congruent. Try SSS, AAS, SAS, or ASA

figured out what all my posts were missing! it was the sun wearing shades in the top left corner

Current mood: Kendrick Lamar eating corn on the cob in a palm tree