tag yourselves i’m “you can’t spell spaghetti”

when you’ve had 31 shots of milk and people keep tossing you

and here's what you missed on off topic 200:

jeremy punching poster trevor (+ gavin somehow) - off topic 200 

me: tries to sign into my google account

google: this UGLY bitch just tried to HACK into your account. destroy all your electronic devices to prevent this

worlds tallest vampire

count everest

mount dracula

Wouldn’t mind if i do

me at 1 pm: borderline comatose, eyes need to be propped open, behaviorally indistinguishable from lichen

me at 1 am: planning an expedition to neptune, listening to three songs at once, blood has become liquid copper

Places where reality is a bit altered:

• any target • churches in texas • abandoned 7/11’s • your bedroom at 5 am • hospitals at midnight • warehouses that smell like dust • lighthouses with lights that don’t work anymore • empty parking lots • ponds and lakes in suburban neighborhoods • rooftops in the early morning • inside a dark cabinet

what the fuck

•hospital waiting rooms •airports from midnight to 7am • bathrooms in small concert venues

I just got the weirdest feeling I swear

What have they become? 

Pride, New York, June 1990

Fifi, the Calico Cat  in Monet’s Garden 

by Elizabeth Murray

[x]

His name is Marshmallow and he’s both long and fat.