NATE IS SOOO... i'm obsessed with his ridiculous mind. he should not have that much power. he should not have that much power.
nate does want to fix wade, but nate is so deeply flawed and controlling and hardly the barometer for you know. moral good. and i'm obsessed and constantly thinking about nate's backwards logic in justifying that wade is a good boy by consequentialism alone. it doesn't matter what wade's intentions are and whether wade had any say in the matter over anything - if, in the end, wade "behaves" it doesn't matter how much nate had to interfere and force wade's hand to get that outcome.
nate: "he did the right thing."
everyone around him: "you literally fucking rearranged all variables around him so that he had no other option than to do the right thing."
nate: "he did the right thing and i'm proud of him."
i'm obsessed with you nathan. full offence what the fuck is wrong with you.
i always say that's kind of just... that's why nate and wade just couldn't ever be healthy, and why peter and wade are just... healthier. because nathan wants control over wade - basically, wants control over everything. wade's intentions don't matter as long as the outcome is desirable. wade can't - wade can't actually turn a new leaf in those circumstances. because he's a disobedient dog, and he will growl and bite and kick if someone tries to control him.
and wade is so aware - wade knows nate is constantly exerting his will over wade's actions.
lord mama they are so fucked up... they are so fucked up...
i think that's why 9319 peter (my beloved) is so good for wade - because he pointedly - pointedly does not want to exert power over wade. he doesn't want responsibility over wade. wade has to make his own decisions. peter is hands-off.
wade isn't a child - or an animal that needs to be tamed. and peter's been all about this since the beginning.
peter knows that a man is the product of the choices he makes. i think peter kind of embodies the power of choice - peter makes the conscious choice to do good, despite his own wants and desires. he could be bad. he could be just like wade. and he knows it.
he doesn't intend to rob wade of choice. he knows how important it is. he knows how important it is that wade makes the choice for himself, to be better.
he doesn't want to take credit for wade's positive change. it's his.
and it makes peter's pride in wade just, all the more sincere. because he knows it's all him. it's all wade.
is peter frustrated that he can't do more to help? endlessly, yeah. but i think he accepts it - that he's powerless.
nate wants so badly to be wade's saviour.
and peter - i think peter's accepted or is learning to accept that he can't be. and kind of never wanted to be, in the first place.
i think it's why wade is kind of scared of the term "hero" - because he's never felt like the hero in his story. he's always felt like a victim of the narrative, or his actions were somehow influenced by someone else or the desire to impress someone else. he has very little trust in his own power of will.
once again, wade attacking peter parker for something he feels guilty of himself. letting outside forces influence his choices rather than taking ownership of his own decisions
the original.. FUN fact. the original draft of civil war was so much more overt about this, actually. and i can finally share the panel. i can finally share the panel from the original draft of that post. it's wild. i don't really remember writing it, and i don't even have the rest of it. but bex saved this one panel and i think about it a lot. out there in the cosmos is an alternative version of that civil war argument that i guess i didn't go for. i think the uncle ben thing worked better. but. still. i love the red art. red is so sexy.
i think wade's whole outrage in civil war with peter was the whole discredit to wade's change. the second that peter put the tracer on wade, PAIRED with the confession that morning, made wade feel all kinds of "oh. i finally qualify for his love." feelings. and it made him angry. because it made wade feel like all the positive change he made wasn't actually for him, but peter's will all along.
god. i got so carried away here. but yeah. wade is all furious about this because it's something nate would pull.
long story short, wade's tired of being controlled, but he's still in the mindset that he's being controlled. by whatever. by peter. by nate. by the author (me) (he's wrong, by the way).
yadda yadda yadda, wade learning he has power. he has free will. he is capable of change, and he's not at the mercy of nathan fucking summers or the narrative all the time.
i think it's fun actually that wade has this perception of powerlessness and an absence of free will in his relationship with nate,, and peter is (unintentionally) teaching wade how he has power over his own life and power over other people and with great power c
