Captain Crusher

use as you please

why are we still here? just to suffer?

an alternate solution

put your goddamn shirt on, Jim

relatable

Concept:

A Ds9 episode from Garak's perspective. The episode is him trying to finish this one big order for some dresses while also stopping an assassination attempt in secret.

We see him get some secret information that Sisko is about to be murdered but he can't tell Sisko for secret reasons. So he has to thwart the assassination attempt himself. We see him make subspace calls to his contacts, sneak around on the station after closing and eventually follow and take out the assassin just as they're about to murder Sisko.

We ALSO see him deal with Quark being a difficult customer, Bolian customs issue for a button delivery and also Julian Bashir being clueless about what is happening right in front of him at all times.

While Garak is dealing with this very stressful day we get hints about some regular A plot business going on. We see Kai Winn pass the shop talking to Sisko. Garak and Julian have lunch and we hear Julian say stuff like "Quark shouldn't have bought that mango in the first place" but we never get any details.

At the end of the episode Garak closes the shop early because obviously he's stressed OUT. Of course Julian says something like "I guess you had a slow day today". Garak smiles and nods and say "Indeed Doctor, I was bored out of my mind" and they walk away smiling, as we pan to the shop storage room where the body of the assassin is shoved inside a box of discarded wrapping paper.

All I want is that one perfectly comedic scene where Garak is in the middle of getting the dead body into the shop when he hears Julian on the promenade outside. Garak, always thinking on his feet, passes the body off as a mannequin while Julian comes in to chat away about racquetball or whatever.

This is funny to me because of all the times Garak is walking around looking like your harmless, gay lizard uncle whose only concern is your atrocious outfit but the whole time he's high as balls on drugs and thinking about murder.

I love my lizard boy

Janeway looks like she's crawling out of a microwave lmao

*ding* your captain is ready

imagine being disliked by either one of them... i would simply die

I'm like 99% sure this joke has already been made but Tumblr's search function isn't helping me find an example so here's my contribution

I have a thought about Cardassian society but it's 01:47 am so I don't know if it makes sense but I'm forming words.

Disclaimer: I have only watched Ds9. I'm sure there's a million books on Cardassian society exploring these issue - I have not read them.

So, Cardassians flirt by bickering. Which I suppose extends to other people you care about too - you pick a fight to show you care.

So, that might create a society of debaters.

Maybe at one point Cardassians solved their internal issues with pure violence. But they are a people of deceit and lies, of manipulation and hidden meanings. Maybe their language is a labyrinth of depth impossible for the universal translator to ever convey. So the need to argue, to bicker, was channeled into public debates.

A duel between rivals in Cardassia is a spectacle, a spoken word battle where the punchlines are vicious but non lethal. They debate in public arenas, where the audience follows the words with gasps and claps. In my mind I see a view of a Roman like senate, where Cardassians have lengthy debates on various topics.

When Garak talk to Julian he will sometimes pick the other side just to argue. Maybe not because he's flirting (all the time), but because Cardassian society view debating as an art form in itself. Also, there's some further thoughts here that I might get into at some point on how the relationship between the public and the private can work in a society that is so militaristic and harshly controlled.

Any Cardassian can argue any point, so you never really know how people feel in public.

MAYBE all I want is to see Dukat walk up on stage at 2 am at some sleazy club on Cardassia Prime to debate a guy with ridge piercings and get absolutely dunked on by everyone in the audience for repeatedly mispronouncing "ubiquitous".

オオサンショウウオ 大山椒魚 サイズ:63cm

Well, this showed up under a gifset of Capt. Janeway.  So my new headcanon is that she sleeps with one of these like it’s a boyfriend pillow.

You saying that Janeway has a Tom Paris waifu body pillow?

star trek heritage post (May 3rd, 2019)

would you trust your icon to babysit your children be honest

I am very sorry, but I had to.