Old Time Family Baseball

Baseball’s back ... kind of! Sure, the games don’t mean anything in the standings, but c’mon, how much does one game out of 162 really mean during the season, too? Honestly, that’s kind of the beauty of it! 

The players are out there, they’re swinging bats, announcers are talking about the need to make contact and they’re reading local sponsors again. (Who knew how badly I needed to hear about Farmer John’s hot dogs or what PC Richards and Sons could do for me and my family?) 

I already saw Tim Anderson bobble a ball, flip it in the air, grab it and fire backhand to second for the out. I’ve seen a Red Sox farmhand rob a home run. I’ve watched dozens of college teams I’ve never heard of before get out onto their carefully manicured astroturf fields, with players showing off some incredibly questionable looks. 

The last year has been a seemingly never-ending nightmare, but the summer months are coming. Cases are coming down and vaccines are being distributed. The baseball season is coming and fans will -- all scientific evidence suggests so -- safely be in the stands. And even though I’m not in Florida or Arizona and am still continue staying in my apartment, it’s a much needed dose of optimism. I hope it’s a welcome boost for you, too. 

Anyway, here’s a few stories I’ve written recently: 

The best baseball cap for every team. Come and yell at me for having bad opinions! Or shower me in gifts for being a noted tastemaker. 

Lauren Taylor found her calling after traumatic brain injury. I was fortunate enough to speak with Taylor about her recent Topps card release and how she turned to art following the darkest moment of her life. She has an amazing story and she has a great talent worth following. 

Which teams can go worst to first? In eight of the last 10 years, a team has gone from last place to a postseason spot. Who could pull it off this year? 

And here are some things I didn’t write, but definitely recommend: 

The time Hank Aaron faced Satchel Paige. Matt Monagan discovered a very cool story: when Aaron was in his prime and Paige was trying to get his pension, the two faced off in Spring Training. 

Meanies, Beer Bellies, Big City Boys: The MLB team names that almost were. It’s Grant Brisbee, so I certainly hope you’ve already read this. 

Ace stuff from names you don’t recognize. Mike Petriello dove into the data and found pitchers who you may not know, but whose pitches closely resemble the very best in the game. Could be good prep for that 16 team, NL-only fantasy league you’ve got. 

I know it’s not a unique story: Young teenager who, up until that point, hadn’t really thought of music -- simply taking in whatever MTV happened to play or whatever 92.3 KROQ felt like playing -- puts on a new album. And, like in a movie when a character takes their first tab of LSD or a rip off a jazz cigarette (The horror of horrors), all of a sudden it hits. The eyes grow wide, the hair stands on end, long-dormant parts of the brain light up. 

That’s what happened when I first heard The Strokes. Sure, I had dabbled in some punk music and had explored some of the bands from the ‘60s and ‘70s like the Velvet Underground, but I had never heard a contemporary band that told me there was something else out there. The Strokes’ “Is This It?” grabbed me by the shoulders and screamed to me, “There’s an entire world out there that you don’t know anything about.” 

From there, I fell in love. I devoured albums. I bought import magazines at the now-shuttered bookstore in my suburban town. I started bands and wrote record reviews for my high school newspaper. The Strokes quite simply changed my life. To this day, when I walk the streets of New York and I put on a Strokes album, it feels different. I feel different. 

All of this is to say -- if you were wondering why a baseball blog was spending so much time talking about high school like this was some kind of coming of age tale -- that the Strokes released a baseball robot music video for “The Adults are Talking.”

They also wrote a song called “Ode to the Mets” on their newest record. And that’s why I got to speak with lead singer Julian Casablancas for a half hour about the video, his love of vintage sports gear, and how the Mets broke his heart. It was a dream come true for me to speak with him -- even if I wasn’t able to send him any demos.  

Here’s the link to check it out: The Mets broke Julian Casablancas’ heart. And thanks to Tom Forget for making the amazing baseball card you see at the top of the post. 

Here’s a few other things from me you may have missed recently: 

The 10 best bloopers of the year. You have to see the amazing ‘90s VHS-style video that was made to go along with the post. I’ve never loved anything so much. 

The 11 funniest moments from Tommy Lasorda’s career. Lasorda was a complicated man and he certainly wasn’t perfect, but he was a beloved figure. His players loved him. Los Angeles will probably give him a statue. So, in honor of his long career, we picked some of his most hilarious -- like the time he got a mascot ejected from a ballgame. 

The history of the bullpen phone. This is a bit older, but with the baseball world quiet it got resurfaced. So, if you missed it before, here’s your chance again! 

When the Mets acquired Francisco Lindor and Carlos Carrasco from Cleveland, it was just the latest in a long line of bizarre trades. Matt Monagan and I took a look at some of the best -- including Harry Chiti being traded for himself. 

"The Holiday” is on in the background as I write this. I hate “The Holiday.” But this year, the idea of going somewhere -- anywhere -- renting someone else’s house, meeting someone and letting them INTO MY HOUSE?! Wow, now that is a fantasy I can get behind. I don’t even care about the rest of the plot. Just let me see someone in my house without worrying that they’ll kill me or I’ll kill them. 

Christmas movies are a weird genre. They’re basically: One (1) terrible person whose life is a mess meets a magical person that changes everything -- all while Christmas lights twinkle around them. But then I realized: That’s also the plot of most sports movies. 

Think about it: So many sports films open the same way. The team is a mess. The star players are awful, selfish people. The backups are drunks, and the team owners make Scrooge seem like a real nice guy. But then, just in time, the new coach, the new signing, the 12-year-old-whose-arm-snapped-in-just-the-right-place shows up and everything is better. There’s a miracle and we all cheer and love and feel joy again. 

I guess what I’m saying is “Rookie of the Year” is a Christmas movie. There’s plenty of ivy, too. If “Die Hard” is an xmas movie, so is this one. 

Anyway, skip a smooth transition, here’s a few things I wrote recently: 

What if Max Scherzer was never a Tiger? When Scherzer was traded to the Tigers in 2009, no one really knew what he was. He wasn’t even the reason for the trade. The starting point was Arizona wanting to bring in Edwin Jackson (and start him on the path to 14 big league clubs.) But what if Scherzer was traded to the Yankees instead? It’s not hard to imagine -- and if it does go down, baseball history is forever changed. 

The triple play that started off a player’s head. All triple plays are weird. This one from 1935 might be the oddest. 

And here are a few things I didn’t write but that are very good and worth your holiday time: 

9 weird stats from this year.  In a 60 game season, nothing makes sense. Embrace the strange! 

The MLB holiday lineup. All hail Steve Christmas! 

You may not know the name Mike Maksudian, but you will now. Mostly because he would eat beetles and cockroaches while in the Minors! 

Who is the best player at every position not in the Hall of Fame? Glad you asked. 

Anyway, I hope wherever you are that you have a relaxing holiday and a happy new year. Here’s hoping 2021 isn’t so dreadfully terrifying. 

One of my favorite things to do during the offseason (beyond catching up on some movies, books, and -- gasp -- watch a few other sports, too. Sorry, Rogers Hornsby, but there’s just too much good stuff out there in the world!) is taking a time machine to another baseball season. You can pull up YouTube and just type in “Rangers 1992″ and be presented with some random game where you have no idea what you’re going to get. Yeah, that means we’re getting plenty of Dickie Thon -- one of my favorite names to ever exist. 

Or you can just watch some old VHS highlight reels (or even better, blooper ones) people uploaded without express written consent. Or you can grab a huge stack of old Smith and Street Baseball Guides -- a co-worker sent me his collection of about 20 years recently -- and dive in. 

Sure, you may know the broad strokes. You know who won the World Series, you know who won the MVPs, but there’s all the nuance you miss. There’s the bit players who had a good month or two and everyone at the time was wondering if he would break out. 

There are interviews that have been lost to time -- never archived for the web, never memorialized in a book of baseball quotes, never added to a plaque at Cooperstown -- and they can provide so much joy. Like, say, that George Brett didn’t hit .400 in 1980 because he wasn’t drinking four to five beers after every game. 

So, if you find yourself missing baseball, head to eBay and grab a giant stack of old mags and transport yourself into another baseball season. 

But you should also make sure you read stuff from this year -- specifically stuff I wrote. (See how smooth this transition was?) Here are some of the things I’ve worked on recently: 

Baseball’s oldest living player turns 100. Eddie Robinson has seen and done everything in baseball. He was playing when Ruth’s number was retired, he won the Indians’ last World Series (quite literally, too, driving in the winning run in Game 6), was the GM when Hank Aaron hit his 715th and was scouting when McGwire hit 62. I spoke to Robinson for about an hour before his 100th birthday. 

Jameson Taillon is obsessed with coffee -- but he also loves people. The offseason is the best time to get to know ballplayers a little more as they get to let their guard down and talk about things that aren’t arm-slot related or about the game last night. So, I got to chat with the Pirates ace about coffee -- his favorite shops, the best brews, the small changes you can make to improve yours -- and also learned that what Taillon loves most of all is getting to know people. 

Cody Bellinger is Otta Sluggasson in “Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla.” I’ve yet to play any Assassin’s Creed, but the fact that an MVP Award winner AND World Series champ plays a hilariously baseball-themed viking character makes it much more likely that I’ll try it out soon enough. I spoke with Bellinger while he’s rehabbing Arizona to learn about how he got the gig and what it’s like being baseball’s biggest meme. 

Dick Allen was one of the coolest to ever play. I never got to watch Dick Allen play, but he was always one of my favorites. The mutton chops, the glasses, the big swing and willingness to push back against a Philadelphia media that couldn’t accept a Black star. Allen passed away last week, so I wrote about what made him such a compelling star. 

Finally, here are a few pieces I didn’t write, but which I highly recommend: 

Billy Wagner learned how to throw lefty. Wagner somehow managed to throw over 100 mph WITH HIS LESS DOMINANT ARM. I can’t even write my name legibly with my left. 

The Ringless Teams!  Not going to lie -- I’m completely shocked that Dusty has NEVER won the World Series. 

Get to know Red Sox reliever Connor Seabold. He’s a changeup artist -- that’s cool. But he’s also an artist artist. 

Sorry for the long break in between posts. (Or, if I’m in the mood to be particularly old-timey, “missives.”) Since I last was back here, we had an election ... that, uh, is still somehow not over. (Well, except that it is.) The World Series was played and somehow Youppi’s curse over the Dodgers is over. (The Dodgers had not won a World Series since Youppi was ejected from a game in 1989.) And, oh yeah, there’s a raging pandemic running rampant over the country. 

Sadly, there is no more Major League Baseball to watch while we’re huddled inside, staying safe and socially distant from other people. But that doesn’t mean there’s no baseball. The KBO playoffs are happening every morning -- if you’re willing to get up early enough.  

Or, you could dive into Mexican Pacific League in the evening! Or the Dominican Winter League! That one has a nifty streaming package for only $20! And while you’re watching, you can see Juan Francisco -- maybe a few lbs heavier than his playing days -- bash baseballs again. And just check out these amazing unis he’s wearing! This is what I wish the Marlins uniforms looked like: 

Dude is just wearing #111 like there are no rules anymore pic.twitter.com/zE8qAcey8v

Of course, this is also the time to catch up with reading and books and movies -- whether about baseball or not. Personally, if you’re looking for something to soothe your weary head and keep you from being perpetually anxious, I recommend Ted Lasso on Apple+. It may not be the funniest show, but it basically takes Major League, sets it in England, and fills it with nice and well-meaning people. 

And if reading is what you’re after, you’re in luck! Here are some stories I’ve worked on recently: 

Negro Leagues statistics have often been referred to as something mysterious and unknowable. But that’s simply not the case -- and part of the issue is that the people who set the rules for these things in the 1960s didn’t care about the Negro Leagues. Fortunately, a group of researchers are diving into microfiche and box scores and old scorebooks and are assembling the most complete data there is. Mule Suttles, the single-season home run leader, just added two more to his total this month after new box scores were found! That’s amazing! 

Ken Griffey Jr. is now a Sounders part-owner. Sadly, he is not going to be on the pitch. 

Awards season may be over, but the awards that really should have been given out like best quarantine mustache never were. So, I tried to fix that. 

Some games are good. Some games are bad. And some games are terrifying. Here are nine of the most frightening. 

And here are a few stories I didn’t write, but are worth your time: 

You know I love scary stories. So, my good friend Matt Monagan told the creepiest tale of all about Rochester’s haunted baseball field. 

Mike Petriello looked at all the data about position players pitching that you wanted to know, but were probably too scared to ask. The offseason are for fun and bizarre baseball stories! 

It’s not baseball, but if you’re an Old Time Family Baseball person you probably care about uniform design. Here’s a ranking of all of the NHL’s new Reverse Retro jerseys. My personal favorite is the Minnesota Wild’s gorgeous update on the old North Stars unis. 

Anyway, stay safe! Have a great holiday -- and if you’re traveling, get tested and isolate! See you next week! 

What happens when you accomplish your dreams, but it turns out more like a nightmare? How do you go on with your life when everything you worked for ended up turning out in the very worst way? 

That’s something I’ve thought a lot about since speaking with Ron Wright. Once a top prospect with light tower power, Wright had a series of injuries and a mistake in surgery that ended all that. Still, he made it up to the big leagues for one game. That day, he struck out, hit into a double play and hit into a triple play never to make it up again. 

Somehow, that didn’t deter him from living a great life without regret. Click here to read his story. 

Here are a few other stories I’ve written recently if you’d like to read: 

While it may seem like destiny for players like Mike Trout to become the best in the sport, that’s not always the case. Trout was never even the game’s top prospect. But there is always one game when we all realize we’re seeing something special. I looked at that game for five of the game’s very best. 

If you’re reading this, chances are you’re a special kind of baseball fan. Maybe you’re drawn to the uniforms. Or maybe you like to write fictional stories about baseball players mixed with hefty doses of magical realism. Maybe you’re in a band and you watch baseball games with your guitar on your lap. Carl Skanberg is one of those fans. He’s an accomplished cartoonist and has been spending his quarantine creating amazing sketchbook scorecards for every White Sox game -- including Lucas Giolito’s no-hitter. I talked to him about his process of turning daily sport into art.

We’ve just passed the halfway point of the year. Which means ... it’s time for completely meaningless midseason awards! 

Also, if you want more stupid baseball stuff, hit me up on Twitter. That’s where I’ll be during most games, screencapping real dumb stuff. 

And here are some things I didn’t write, but you should read: 

My colleague Matt Monagan wrote the story of a man who was traded for catfish (really) and then pitched a perfect game for his new team. 

One of the biggest inspirations for me to start writing about baseball was Craig Calcaterra, who combined baseball knowledge, humor, and razor sharp takes. For 11 years, he wrote every day at NBC Sports. Recently he was let go as the entire sports division took massive cuts. He started up a newsletter which I highly recommend to keep up with the sport. 

Bryce Harper showed up on Opening Day with the most insane, crystal-loaded cleats that looked like the Phillie Phanatic. Turns out, a fashion designer created them. This is the story. (The Athletic, sub required) 

I hope you and yours are staying safe and doing your best to socially distance while soaking up what you can from the worst summer in history. 

In a year of just absolute dreadfulness, the past few days have been a welcome relief. Obviously, I’m talking about the new Taylor Swift record. (OK, I’m joking. It’s mostly the new baseball season, but that Lady Tay decided to drop a surprise album with the guitarist from The National on the eve of Opening Day was a pretty nice boon, too.) 

I hope wherever you are, you’ve been able to get some enjoyment from the new season. Watching Joey Votto go deep on Opening Day, perhaps turning back the clock from the past two seasons, was a delight. Seeing Kyle Hendricks throw a complete game -- the first on Opening Day since 2013 -- was a wonderful surprise. Seeing Anthony Rizzo hand out hand sanitizer is a reminder that yeah, things are different these days, but we can still be good to each other. 

I know my last few months have felt like the days have blended together into a kind of fuzzy, endlessly depressing blur. I now only see friends on Zoom calls or the two times I’ve sat on chairs near their stoop for a chat. Baseball can’t fix everything, but the joy I’ve had being able to sit down on my couch (where my entire life now resides) and getting to watch the game I deeply love has done wonders for me -- even if the Pirates don’t feel like winning games so far. I hope it’s been able to do that for you, too. 

Anyway, here are a few things I’ve written recently that you may want to read: Here’s a reason to believe for all 30 teams. Hey, even the Orioles have a chance (just not a very good one.) 

Does Taylor Swift’s new record predict the season? She’s been predicting baseball for a long time -- even if just by accident -- so I have written dumber things. 

The 12 strangest Opening Day games in history. The Tigers’ first Opening Day as a big league team in 1901 is my favorite.

Finally, two things I didn’t write, but are worth your time: 

The MLB.com team put together a weird fact from every Opening Day game. A weird year demands weird facts. 

Daniel Bard, who was out of the game for seven years, made it back with the Rockies ... and earned a win. 

If you’ve been here for a while, you know whimsy and fun are my favorite part of sports. Sure, the moments where you think you’re going to throw up because you’re so tense, or that you want to cry because a loss was so crushing are great and addictive, but if that was every day we’d never tune in. Most movies and TV shows we watch don’t even push us to the brink. (There’s a reason it’s the season finales that do it.) 

So, yeah, sports should be fun. Fun things are fun and should be treated as such. None of us played Little League because it was do or die every Saturday. And though I felt that way, it had more to do with being an extremely overanxious kid than how much it actually mattered. 

Years before we were GIF-ing dugout celebrations and players were sharing fun moments on their social media accounts, supermodel, actress, entrepreneur etc etc etc Christie Brinkley shot a super fun and strange baseball card set. I talked to her and Jim Thome -- and Mark Bowman helped out with a conversation with Chipper Jones -- about the set. Check it out here. 

Here are a few other things I’ve done recently: 

A short season means we could see some awfully weird numbers. Could Trout hit .400? Will Madison Bumgarner ever get to the plate? How many errors will Fernando Tatis Jr. commit?! These are the over/unders I set. 

Speaking of Bumgarner, will he be the last pitcher to ever hit a home run? 

Looking for that perfect shirsey to set you apart from other fan’s? This is the 2020 shirsey guide. 

Like players that do things unlike anyone else? Love Tim Locastro’s speed and ability to get hit by pitches (Who doesn’t?) I looked at seven players who are unlike anyone else in the sport. 

And here are some things that I didn’t write, but are definitely worth your time: 

The star of the scrimmages has been the Dodgers’ ballboy Chico. But just who the hell is he? 

Two triple plays in a single game? It happened and the Twins’ Kent Hrbek remembers it. 

When the season starts, we’ll see a real decrease in dumb stories that are lots of work and are super fun. Like this one by big baseball brain Mike Petriello on the best jersey numbers in baseball history by WAR. 

This is a great story. After being out of the Majors for seven years, Daniel Bard made the Opening Day roster with the Rockies. 

I’ve seen some of the chatter online, that whoever wins the World Series this year will have a giant asterisk attached to it. I don’t want to hear about that, I have no patience for it. 

Sure, it’s a 60 game season. Sure, a “bad” team could sneak into the playoffs. But guess what? 60 games is just as absurd and arbitrary number as 162. There was no stone tablet handed down by the baseball gods that say “Thou shalt play 162 games games, and if thou doesn’t, you will burn in the 1,000 fires.” And you think bad teams haven’t snuck into the playoffs? Just talk to the 2006 Cardinals -- winners of 83 games -- and tell me that it wasn’t really just a handful of wins at the right time that pushed them to the top. 

This season is going to be hard. There is a pandemic racing through the country that we couldn’t beat and, it seems, didn’t want to beat. There’s a reason to be concerned for the safety of the players, the staffs, the families of those involved. The season may not even finish. 

But if it does, and there is a World Series champion crowned, what they will have done will have been even more impressive than in a normal year. Just consider the personal stresses that will be on every player. Just think of the importance of every game as fans trapped at home and anxious because of /gestures toward everything happening in the world get at least a few hours of the greatest sport on Earth to soothe the nerves. 

Baseball can’t fix everything. And perhaps the season will lose its battle against the virus before it even starts. All I know is that this is what my brain looks like right now: 

baseballbaseballbaseballbaseballbaseballbaseballbaseballbaseballbaseball

Here’s to July 23. Or 24th. Whatever they decide. 

Anyway, enough of that big picture stuff. Here are some baseball articles I wrote if you want to read them and think about baseball: 

The 13 coolest teams of all-time. Being good is nice, being cool, though? So much better. (Yes, obviously Ken Griffey Jr. is inside here) 

You ever hear about John Paciorek? You should have. He had the greatest debut a player can have. At the age of 18, he went 3-for-3, drew two walks and drove in three runs. But he never played in the Majors again. This is his story. 

I also wrote about Bobo Holloman, who had to beg his boss to let him start ... and then went out and threw a no-hitter. Yeah, that’s cool. 

Finally, I wrote about 15 of the strangest, funniest and most bizarre uniforms in baseball history. Check it out. 

Here are some pieces I didn’t write, but are definitely worth your time: 

If you’ve been around here for a while, you know I love the bunt. So, I actually hate this article. But if you hate the bunt like most do, Mike Petriello on why the sacrifice bunt might disappear is probably up your alley. 

Here’s a fun one from Tim Brown and Hannah Keyser. They interviewed 30 people in baseball and asked them what they got better at during quarantine. (If you’re anything like me, you got better at sitting on the couch and eating trash.) 

I hate the DH. That’s fine. You probably like it. But this year probably marks the end of pitcher’s hitting. Jayson Stark wrote the eulogy for these awful hitters. 

In this space, I usually share a few jokes and link to some of the pieces I’ve worked on in other internet places. 

But things aren’t so funny right now. And my voice is not one we need to be listening to. 

Black lives have been treated as less than for the entire history of this country. We’ve seen that from the very first moment that the United States became a country. We’ve seen that in the cases of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, Eric Garner, Stephon Clark, Philando Castile, and so many more, going on for far too long. We’ve seen that in our laws and our communities, in the redlining of suburbs and how, even now, black-owned businesses struggle to get approval for necessary payroll protection loans. There are two realities in this world, and your access and safety depend so heavily on the color of your skin. 

So, rather than link to my work, I wanted to share the words of black players from the past few weeks. These are the voices that have been ignored or pushed aside to make people who look like me feel comfortable for far too long. 

Gary Sheffield recently penned a piece in the Players Tribune about the racism and police brutality that he suffered first hand, and which -- during his playing career -- few wanted to hear about. 

The Mets’ Dominic Smith shared on Twitter how racism has impacted every day of his life, and that “Silence Kills.”

Giancarlo Stanton, Aaron Judge, Jackie Bradley Jr, Andrew McCutchen, CC Sabathia and more black MLB players came together to release a video where the players shared in one very important message: 

Braves Minor Leaguer Trey Harris joined the Effectively Wild podcast to talk about what it’s like to be black in America and in baseball, and the additional barriers players of color have to cross. Listen here.

Royals Minor Leaguer Nick Heath and Johns Hopkins third baseman Matt Ritchie went on the Baseball BBQ podcast to discuss the killings of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor, as well as how baseball can do a better job at being a more diverse and welcoming sport. Click here to listen. 

Negro Leagues museum curator Ray Doswell recently gave an interview highlighting how far we’ve come, but also how far we still have to go. 

In The Athletic, retired baseball players including Ryan Howard, Jimmy Rollins, Dontrelle Willis, Doug Glanville, and Torii Hunter got together on a call to share their experiences. It’s a sobering look at just how different these worlds are, and it all comes down to if you’re black or white.

Jimmy Rollins said:

Negro Leagues President Bob Kendrick moderated a discussion on race in baseball with Josh Bell, Lorenzo Cain, Mychal Givens, Dwight Smith Jr., Taylor Hearn, and Delino DeShields Jr. Click here to view it. (I’ll also embed it at the bottom of the post.)

Jack Flaherty posted his thoughts on the ongoing police violence against black communities: 

If you’ve been out there protesting, stay safe. And if you haven’t, I hope you’ve done what you can, from reading, listening and supporting black voices to donating money.

Organizations that I’ve donated to include the Brooklyn Bail Fund, Black Lives Matter, and Black Visions Collective. But things have changed recently and there may be better places where your money can do more good at this moment. Here’s a piece from Vox that might help. 

Perhaps you have better things to do with your time than I do because in this world where time doesn’t exist and leaving the house is but a memory, I have been clicking around YouTube in the late night hours far more than I’d like to admit. 

Like everyone else, I’ve devoured Bon Appetit videos, even though I hate cooking! I don’t do it, except for eggs, and pancakes and, like, chips covered in cheese. 

I’ve watched people opening boxes, just to remember what it was like to get mail and not have to dip it in liquid nitrogen to kill the germs. 

I’ve watched people react to watching things on YouTube because, well, I don’t really know why I’ve done that. 

Still, every now and then, I stumble upon something beautiful, something glorious, something that -- as Dr. Jones knows -- belongs in a museum. I’m talking about the episode of Harry and the Hendersons that featured Griffeys both Junior and Senior. 

I recently wrote about that episode -- breaking down all the most important things like the insane leather jacket that Junior wore. Click here to check it out. 

Then you should read the other things I’ve done recently: 

I recently made a quiz featuring famous broadcast moments ... before the moment happened. Can you figure out the game? 

Ever wonder what would happen if a team ran out of players? And what would it look like if they did play with eight? Here’s the answer. 

Frank Thomas. Joe Morgan. Cliff Lee. No, not the famous dudes -- these are the ballplayers that just happen to share their names. 

And here are the pieces I didn’t write, but which I enjoyed very much and think you might, too.  

Not watching sports is hard, but what is it like for players? Nolan Arenado gave a revealing, very human interview about where his head’s at. 

Bryce Harper has done a lot of cool things, and he showed that off from his very first game. Andrew Mearns over at Baseball Prospectus looks back at that first game. 

A prank that forever changed the game? Yeah, Will Leitch looks at one of baseball’s strangest stories. 

Anyway, that’s it for now. Hope you are all doing well and staying safe. 

I tried. I really tried. I tried to watch the NFL Draft. 

I’m a casual NFL fan. I love the Patriots (sorry -- been that way ever since I was a young boy watching a terrible team in the ‘90s) and will usually get together with friends and watch a couple playoff games. That’s about the extent of my fandom. 

But with nothing else happening live -- with no other event happening while everyone is sitting around watching and tweeting and reacting to the same thing -- I figured, screw it. I’ll watch the draft. 

Oh lord, what a mistake that was. How is this enticing entertainment when there are live sports? 

How is this a three-day event? And how does ESPN manage to find every player’s greatest trauma and turn that into a slickly produced story about the player? Oh yeah, and why did the Bengals need a 10 minute clock when they’ve had months to figure out, oh yeah, we want Joe Burrow? 

The worst part of all of this? When the third day returns in a few hours, I’ll probably put it on in the background. After all: THERE IS NOTHING ELSE. 

Anyway, instead of following the NFL Draft, why not read some of the stuff I’ve done recently? 

I put together my greatest list of mustaches, beards, and overly complex facial hair for all 30 teams. No, Rollie Fingers is not on the list. Yes, you can yell at me.  

I also assembled a list of a weird retro commercial from every team’s history. Because when you can write about Joe Mauer bringing milk to a date with his mom, you have to do it. 

How is Andrew McCutchen spending his quarantine? By working on his characters. 

What’s the one thing Ichiro isn’t good at? Reading books. 

Finally, I tried to answer an unanswerable question: Where did the bullpen phone come from? Shockingly enough, no one knows. 

And what’s some stuff I didn’t write that is also wonderful? Glad you asked. 

If you enjoy things like The Strokes and Stephen Malkmus, then Rustin Dodd and Andy McCullough’s ranking of the best baseball songs is for you. 

My colleague and friend Chris Landers put together every team’s biggest draft regret. This is super cool and loaded with stories I didn’t know. 

Another colleague and another friend Eric Chesterton wrote about the origin story for every mascot. Like Batman, they all have one. Unlike Batman, none of them involve murdered parents. 

If you didn’t get a chance to watch Grady Sizemore, then man, I feel sorry for you. He was it. Andrew Simon looks at what might have been. 

Where does Mike Trout stand out most? You know, other than in every single way.

I’ve become very good at playing pretend recently. I always thought that I was good at it, but I realize now I was merely pretending to, uh, pretend. I wasn’t fully embracing a reality of my own creation.

Sure, that paragraph reads like a new age manifesto, or like someone whose quarantine has pushed him a little too far. And sure, there’s probably something to that, too. 

But no, I’ve become very good at tricking my brain into thinking it’s 2017, or 2011 or 1982. 

I was never someone that would go and watch classic games, or even past favorites of mine. In the offseason, I might pull up a random game from the past simply because I like the sounds or maybe I’d see something funny that everyone had forgotten about, but really, I didn’t see the point. Sports were of the moment, they are these communal things that bring us together and the action rises and falls across a single game and across a season. How could one simply just go back? 

Turns out, during a global pandemic, you can. 

Over the last few years, I’ve become a huge Boston Bruins fan and I was looking forward to them mounting a Stanley Cup run this spring. Since that’s not happening, I’m now watching every game from the 2011 playoffs (which I did not watch as it happened). Sure, I know the final, final outcome, but every night I’ll put on my Bruins jersey and sit down and watch as if it’s happening all at once. Sometimes, for just a few minutes maybe, my mind will forget this was in the past and life feels good again. 

It’s the same for the daily MLB.com game. Friday featured Rich Hill’s no-hitter that was spoiled by Josh Harrison’s 10th-inning home run. I had even watched this one live as it was happening, but at some point in the middle innings, I found myself so frustrated that the team wasn’t hitting I had to catch myself and realize: This is all pre-ordained. 

I even found myself incredibly invested in a dice baseball game I played with a friend online. (It’s super simple and super fun: You can thank Pirates beat writer Stephen Nesbitt and his father for this one. You’ll need an Athletic account, but it’s worth it.) 

Playing as the Reds, this pen-and-paper version of Nick Senzel became a lifelong favorite when I (he?) cracked a two-run home run while I was predicting that he (me?) would simply ground out. 

And when Joey Votto hit a three-run homer to take the lead, I whooped and hollered more than I had in weeks. My wife had to come in from the other room to remind me that we had neighbors.

But for a few minutes, playing make believe made up for ... all of this (gestures wildly.) 

Anyway, here are a few things I wrote this week about baseball that will hopefully give you something fun to read for a few minutes: 

Ken Griffey Jr. was nearly traded to the Mets in 2000. I traced all the insane things that would have happened if the trade went through. (Griffey himself may actually have the smallest impact.) 

If you’ve been here for a while, you may know that I love Toad Ramsey. Well, I wrote about the man who invented the knuckleball and the pint of whiskey in a pitcher of beer. 

Who will be the best players in baseball in a decade? It’s almost impossible to know. So, I asked a baby and a guy named Ken Rosenthal to answer the question. The art Jenny Goldstick made for the post also makes me laugh a lot. 

Oh and here’s one weird fact for every big league team. 

Here are also a few things I didn’t write, but that I demand you read: 

Grant Brisbee has the investigation you need to see: Barry Zito is on the Masked Singer. 

Andrew Simon remembers the great friendship between Adrián Beltré and Félix Hernández. It’s the kind of feel-good article we could all use right now. 

Friend and amazing writer Eric Nusbaum has a new book out called “Stealing Home,” that you should all go purchase. It’s about the building of Dodger Stadium and the people who were displaced because of it. He was set to go on a nice little tour for the book when all this went down, so maybe go buy a copy for yourself to read in quarantine? 

Stay safe and healthy. 

(art by Tom Forget) 

I’ve been playing MLB: The Show 20 a lot. Like, a dangerous amount. Probably an unhealthy amount. But then again, what is one to do when we’re trapped inside, with our neighbors and friends having been painted as secret enemies who could be carrying a deadly disease without ever knowing it? What are we supposed to do when sports -- that beautiful nothing-could-be-more-important meaningless game -- aren’t on TV or even being played anywhere? What I wouldn’t give for an “Old Man and the Sea”-style ability to follow along via box score. That would at least give my mind something to latch onto. 

Fortunately, I can pretend. And right now, I’m doing a really good job. So far, I’ve been able to connect with my Road to the Show creation -- Basquiat Lipzcomba, a stout 93-mph hurler with a mullet and chops -- in a way I haven’t to a video game character since I was a child. He just broke in with the Tigers and while he and the team are both struggling, a glimmer of hope is there. 

I’m playing with the Red Sox in a season, too -- trying to will the team to the postseason, even without Mookie Betts. Turns out, I really like Alex Verdugo. I didn’t know that before. 

It’s not baseball and yet ... it is. I’m very bad -- especially at hitting, but if you’d like to play online, let me know! The message system here is terrible, so hit me up on Twitter. I’m @michaelsclair. 

Anyway, here are a few things I’ve written this week about baseball! 

Topps recently released a super interesting project. They contacted 20 artists and had them create their versions of 20 iconic baseball cards. I spoke with two of the artists that were featured at release. 

Ever wanted to live inside a baseball stadium? At Indianapolis’ old Bush Stadium, you can do just that. The developers converted the stadium into apartments without tearing the structure down. I spoke with the architect about how he did it. 

You likely know of Dick Groat as the Pirates and Cardinals shortstop, who won a couple of World Series, and even came away with an MVP Award. But if not for Branch Rickey, Groat may have been the greatest two-sport star ever. I talked to the 89-year-old Groat recently about his greatest sporting regret.

On Thursday, when we should have been celebrating Opening Day, we instead honored it with Opening Day at Home. 30 classic games -- one for each team -- were broadcast and streamed over a variety of sources. And while we all remember the big moments, I was more interested in the stuff from these games that didn’t make the headlines. These are the forgotten stars and hilarious moments from the day. 

And finally, just something cute that we could all use: Carlos Carrasco’s son impersonating dear old dad. 

And because we all need more, here are a few more stories that I read and really enjoyed: 

Eric Chesterton looked at some of the best and weirdest uniform number trades in history. 

Chris Landers figures out who the immortal Mighty Casey was based on. 

Craig Calcaterra has been sparking plenty of discussion lately at Hardball Tal, but this was my favorite: Which player did you think was going to be a star but wasn’t? 

Not surprisingly, Grant Brisbee went and found a bunch of weird, fun baseball stuff to check out on the Internet Archive. 

Stay safe and healthy, everyone. 

Well, this isn’t how this was supposed to go. We were supposed to be wrapping up Spring Training in about a week. We were supposed to be emerging from our homes -- wearing that one loose sweatshirt we keep to hide the weight we put on during the winter -- and emerge back in life. Picnics! Brunch outside! Beer gardens!  

But of course, things have to change during a pandemic. I hope all of you are staying healthy and safe, and most importantly, indoors. I have been. Social distancing is the most important tool we have to slow the spread of COVID-19. And while that’s definitely a bummer, there is so much we can do in our homes! 

My to-do list is absolutely jam-packed with the things I wish I had the time to do. Long books have been started! Comic books that have sat by my bed for months are being read. Meaningless mid-90s June baseball games are being streamed. (If you’re curious, the one I put on right now is here.) 

It’s a scary time and in no way am I trying to minimize that. But at the very least, we can hang out with our roommates, housemates, and spouses and play some board games while we hope to flatten the curve. 

If that’s not enough for you, here are a few things I’ve written recently if you want to check out: 

Photo Day must be the hardest day in Spring Training. Every other day is spent just warming up, getting in shape and then hitting the pool for the rest of the day. But Photo Day is when you take the photo that follows you everywhere you go. I put together the dumbiest, wackiest and worst. 

You know what’s a game you can stream on YouTube? The 1982 Cracker Jack Old-Timers Classic. You may know it as the game where 75-year-old Luke Appling hit a home run. And while that’s incredibly insane, plenty more happened including running catches from Hank Aaron and the slowest infield single you’ll ever witness. I got to speak with Brooks Robinson and Dick Cecil, who organized the event, for a piece. Check it out. 

(Art by Ben Marra / MLB.com)

And here are some things written by people that are not me: 

The writers at MLB.com looked and found a classic game from each team that you should watch. This is the time to catch up. 

Great news! PBS is streaming all of Ken Burns’ baseball online! For free! Check it out here! 

Anyway, I’m going to play MLB the Show, watch some old baseball games, and read a bunch of old books. Stay healthy, stay safe. 

Did you think it was never going to happen? Did you think the winter would never end? Did you think you were doomed to an eternity without baseball, that the offseason would never end and baseball players would never take the field again? 

I mean, it’s possible. Just imagine: What if there was a very specific rapture-type ... thing ... and only the baseball players were taken from the world? I mean, it’s about as unlikely as a real rapture, but I suppose possible. Or what if there was a hiccup in the system and everyone overnight forgot what baseball even was ... except for one man. Again, a terrible idea, but before you tell me how dumb it is, remember that was the plot for “Yesterday” -- a movie I never saw and hope I never will. 

But anyway, even those fears are unfounded. Because baseball is back. Players are playing. Yermin Mercedes is hitting home runs, a guy named Cody Thomas is robbing home runs. It’s actually my favorite time of the year when the baseball is weird and relaxing and there are no stakes because everyone is just hanging out in the sun in Florida and Arizona. If there’s a heaven, I hope it’s like that. 

Anyway, here are a few things I wrote recently that you may want to check out: 

Can astrology explain Clayton Kershaw’s bad postseasons? I teamed up with Gemma Kaneko and Jenny Goldstick for this one that is loaded with killer images and infographics. Basically, if you’ve ever read your horoscope, you’ll want to check this one out. 

I interviewed Emily Nemens about her new novel, “The Cactus League.” If you’re on the baseball internet at all, you’ve probably heard about this book. It’s getting tons of buzz in both the lit and sports communities. And it’s worth it. Nemens is the editor of the Paris Review and is also a diehard Mariners fan. I met her for coffee one morning and talked to her about the book and her love of Ken Griffey Jr. Check it out. 

Here is more information on turf than you’ll ever want to know. 

And here’s some stories I didn’t write but are worth your time: 

Madison Bumgarner participates in rodeos under a fake name. Yes, really. This is a subscription article, but if this story doesn’t make you run out and sub now, well, I don’t know what you’re waiting for. 

Sure, I’m shilling for my company, but MLB.com did a great series with profiles about a cult hero for each team. They just wrapped up and put the entire list together in one helpful location. Long live the Benny Agbayanis of the world. 

(Art by Jenny Goldstick) 

Race to the World Series: The Game

(Note: This first appeared in the now defunct Sports on Earth in 2013 and, unfortunately, disappeared from the web during a CMS update. Thanks to @NicoleCahill_ on Twitter, I was reminded this even existed, and now can upload it. Here are the rules and game pieces!) 

While baseball’s regular season is a cruel, exacting marathon, one that tests the mettle and resilience of every team, the Major League playoffs are a different beast. Instead, the playoffs are a contest of chaos, a gauntlet of random events, hardly a game of skill. Sure, some strategy is involved like, “Hey, should I use the good reliever in the 8th inning? Or the not so good one? Should I bench all my best hitters and start my son’s Little League team instead?” But really, in the end, it’s mostly luck. Or karmic retribution. At least, that’s what Billy Beane tells himself every night while trying to not cry. 

RACE TO THE WORLD SERIES: THE BOARD GAME is the same. You could use strategy like: