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oh no a ghost

@cryptidcaptain / cryptidcaptain.tumblr.com

captain | 23 | UK | he/him | I do art sometimes (tagged: my art) | comms open! just drop me a message if you're interested πŸ€™
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feel like I'm going insane watching almost everyone talk about how good abigail was. like. did we watch the same film?

#i was about to say it was perfectly watchable but i dont think it was even that#it was fine in the cinema with friends cos we could all gesture incredulously at each other but.#its not something id voluntarily rewatch#the actors were good and the characters were like. they were stock horror movie roles but they were wnjoyable#but the. the dialogue? the pacing? the PLOT?#am gonma lose my mind#im normally not this much of a hater for films but. i think its the fact that so many people are saying its good.#when its. its not#its not a well written film in any sense
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ladyoriza

I hear Kendrick Lamar murdered Drake with his voice.........shouted him apart.....

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cryptidcaptain

(couldn't add video in an rb so I'm posting it separately) everyone please watch this man experience the gonster. average rangers fan

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cryptidcaptain

[Description: A tiktok from Onebigpikey, a man wearing a backwards cap and a Rangers jersey, standing in a kitchen. He has an empty glass on the countertop in front of him.

Transcript:

"Let's try it! What's going on tik-tokkies, let's try the Gronster- Grockster? Grogster? Grubster? How can I not say that with an 'R'? Grockster. Grockster? That sounds right. There we go we got the Monster Energy... [falsetto] Nitroooo! Oh oh, daddy! Oh boy! [starts pouring] Brrp brrp brrp - [back to normal] 'bout a half way... [sniffs] I've never had this - [sips] [coughs] Wow that's... [continues pouring] delicious...

[stops pouring] That looks good! AND - whoever sent me this, uh, [shows spoon to camera] beautiful pouring spoon with Guiness and The Bass engravings thank you very much I know you're from Louisville Ohio but I had no name and nothing and uh... this is awesome! So- [balances spoon on glass] we're gonna do a lil' bit of that... Look at THAT! [falsetto] Look at that! [pops can] [back to normal] Ohh delicious Guiness... ohhhhhhh baby let's get here... alright, ready? [starts pouring]

Oooooohhh... aaaahhhhahahh..... you gotta do it slow you can't do it fast... [keeps pouring until the glass is full] Bwoop! [removes spoon] Look- AHAHAHAHA LOOK AT THAT! [laughing] THAT IS FUCKIN' WILD! We're gonna let this settle for a minute! Dude! What a wild looking... what a wild looking drink this is. Holy... Moses! That is good- alright! Let's see- GAME THREE BABY! RANGERS GO RANGERS! WOO!

Alright, right here - [lifts the drink] cheers! [taps glass on counter and downs it one go]

[sets the empty glass down and begins waving his arms] [incomprehensible] Duusdwadeeeeeeewwweugh! Dude that's like the weirdest hguuughuh.. igh.. [burps] Oh I'm better. It's like the weirdest mouthfeel EVER dude! It's like sp... it's like spikey and silky at the same time... BUT THE FLAVOUR'S AWESOME! IT'S REALLY GOOD!

Jesus, how much sugar's in this shit- [reads Monster can] HOLY MOTHER- fifty one grams holy crap I was gonna have another one but I don't wanna die. I'm not diabetic just don't like sugar that much... ANYWAY DUDE GO TRY THAT HAHA IT'S NOT BAD IT'S PRETTY GOOD! [laughing] ANYWAY - I LOVE YA, I'M GONNA GO WATCH SOME DAMN HOCKEY, GOODBYE!"

End.]

#this was a trip to transcribe.
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I've been trying to post a video for the past hour and am now scared that without warning its going to post like 20 times. if this happens, know it was not my intention I just wanted to show u guys a video of a guy, possibly the best possible guy to undertake the challenge, making and drinking the gonster

#connor.txt
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kissesaccepted
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cemeterything

the phrase "why? well, it's a sex thing for me" is always on the tip of my tongue and one of these days it's going to slip free with catastrophic consequences

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