“I visited the pumpkin patch yesterday and decided to bring home a pumpkin that in shape appeared to be a penguin. Friends and family were mystified until I started painting him.“

by Volensblood

tbh I am ugly but I’m also gorgeous it’s very complex

use comic sans to write

i hate this so much but this knowledge is too powerful to keep from you all.

last night @phaltu discovered that setting your font to comic sans in google docs improves writing speed and creativity by an insane amount. “no” i said and “die” but then i tried it and god. i wish it wasn’t this way. i wish it wasn’t true. i wish i could protect you all from this but it’s real. 

something about this font is so disarming. something about this font lets you look past the shape of the words and into their soul. i’ve never written so much as i did last night, on my phone, at 2am, in comic sans.

if you have writer’s block. if you lack inspiration. if you need this. don’t be afraid to use it. sometimes the things we find most horrifying are also the things we need the most. trust me. let comic sans into your life.

it’s true

update: this actually works. i’m so angry.

my friend told me about this and I laughingly suggested it to my wife (who had a good number of essays to write and less than a week to write them). She finished 3 essays in 2 days using comic sans.

She was livid.

this meme made me realise that other people apparently know how to show empathy without personal anecdotes 

… how…. please teach me

I’m pretty sure none of us will get answers but please…if someone knows the secrets to showing empathy without personal anecdotes please speak up. We need answers

(Me (adhd + autism) can show empathy, but not sympathy. For me, it’s like I do the exact same thing, but as well as showing empathy through anecdotes I show sympathy through empathy).

@decabus @some-teeth-in-a-trench-coat @messynogenderpotato

I have somethin I guess? I’ve been the Support Friend for most of my life so I managed to get it down to a formula. TW: dog death

1. Ask Questions

This is mainly to keep them talking, that way a) they feel like they have a confidante in you, and b) the pressure is less on you to Say Things. In fact it shouldn’t be about you Saying Things at all, it should be you figuring out where they’re at and trying to understand.  E.g. “My dog died, I miss him.” Ask questions, and when they start talking, let them talk. “What was his name?” “How and when did he die?” “Tell me about him.” “What was he like?” “What’s your favourite memory of him?” “When did you first meet him?” “Did you teach him any tricks?” Again the point is to keep them talking, the questions are just to get them on a roll. If you’re worrying about what to say next, listen to what they’re saying and ask details of what they’re currently talking about, or mentally prepare your next question.

2. Listen

Let them talk. The more you listen to them talk, the more they feel like it’s okay to talk to you. If they dwindle off, ask them something else to get them talking again. Upset people usually have a lot to say.

Every now and again you can throw in little sentences like “Wow, what a bitch!” “Aw, so sad.” “What the fuck? Why?” just to prove you’re still listening and following, and haven’t wandered off into space.

3. When they’re done, give it back to them

It’s a technique called mirroring. Sum up whatever you heard in short form - if they’ve talked for half an hour about the little details of their deceased pet, say something like “It sounds like he was a very good boy/sounds like he meant a lot to you/sounds like you will miss him.” It’s been known to make people dissolve into a sobbing mess, because this is the part where you prove you’ve done your homework, you listened, you care, you get it.

4. If you really want to offer a solution, ask first. You can just skip this step altogether tbh.

Only when someone has finished talking about whatever is upsetting them, ask if you can help. “Can I offer some advice?”  Now is the time for SHORT anecdotes. Short. It’s not about you sharing your story, it’s about them getting advice. Remember they don’t have to take your advice, again it’s about them and their emotions, and they know themselves best. “When my dog died, I did this. Would that help?” “I read somewhere about doing this. Maybe try that and see how it goes?”

Hope this helps y’all. The TL;DR of all this is basically listen, and prove you’re listening.

Thank you!!!

That explanation really is so good!

as someone with ADHD: this has saved me

do you feel like every compliment you get is a lie or are you normal

Loch Rusky, Scotland by John Mcsporran

yes I am fully aware that I’m The Worst™ but I still wanna be like……. loved and stuff

stop asking me how everything is going, i don’t know i’ve been ignoring it

cottagecore is over lighthousecore is IN

also I learned about this project called “queering the map.” the idea is that in the past gay neighborhoods and gay spaces were very clearly defined bc it just wasn’t safe to be yourself anywhere else. as lgbt+ people become more visible and accepted many feel that we are losing our connection to those spaces

so every dot on this map is basically someone’s queer experience: coming out, meeting their future wife, seeing another gay man in public for the first time, anything you can think of that truly left a mark on them

it started in Montreal and is primarily English-language with most pins dropped in the US, Canada, and Europe, but there are people all over the world who’ve shared their experiences. it’s great to look at places near you but it’s also great to see that even people in places you thought were the middle of nowhere are happy with themselves and finding community and living their lives

It’s here and it’s SO SWEET?? Just clicking around it’s very personal stories, in first person and a lot of them addressed to a specific “you”, and sooo many in extremely poetic language. It feels like an art installation and it’s so beautiful. ;W; Thanks for sharing!!!

… there’s also a lot of really silly ones (like gay sharks in the middle of the ocean)

I looked at Jerusalem and immediately found two favorites for entirely different reasons.

Things I found from the queer community of japan:

It’s no secret to the Japanese that Shinjuku nichome is the gay district of Tokyo but about half the pins left there are for the same club in that area named gold finger. Definitely a place to check out if you’re looking to get involved in the Japanese queer community for whatever reason, it seems.

I have a sneaking suspicion this submission is a haiku when written in Japanese…

This guy got the scenic view I guess

Is this how people feel while reading deep romantic poetry because wow I’m moved.

Honestly the best feeling is learning we’re not as alone as we’ve been led to believe

These are all super poetic oml I appreciate every single one of them

There are none in my town. Guess I’ll be the first

I went to my old, STAUNCHLY conservative town and saw “There are a lot more of us here than most would think, past and present” and I nearly cried

small town australia vibes

oceania gays are funny bitches

With what’s happening in Poland, it’s super important for us queer folks to be able to find each other and take strength from the community. I’ve always loved queering the map and I thank whoever created it every day.

— Cameron Awkward-Rich, “Bad News, Again,” via Mass Poetry

that "OKAY SO" before someone u love starts infodumping........ most blessed feeling in the world