@alchemyprime / alchemyprime.tumblr.com
I have a disorder that makes me want to headcanon every nonhuman character with the ability to purr regardless if it makes sense for their kind or not. It's called being right. With enough research i could justify a tree purring if i wanted to
i think a tree would probably bark
Blocked
daddy has to be honest kitten. i think we're going to have to sublease and turn the sex dungeon into a bedroom again. the rent is going up and your asmr slime youtube isnt taking off like we thought it would
The "how many feet" is so I know whether to have a real orgasm or just fake it really well, just to be clear.
Okay, idea. If I ever make an MMORPG that isn’t all retro and pixelated? I will have a slider on your Inventory screens. And the slider will go from “Sexy” to “Practical” and every armor will be able to move along the slider for either gender.
So if you want to play the voluptuous female or runner-y man in skimpy armor that is less covering than He-Man’s classic look? You can. And if you want to be fully covered and look like you won’t get skewered from stem to stern? You can.
And you can change your mind WHENEVER.
Give me like… ten years and $150,000. That should do it.
Okay, so it's been 10 years and I haven't done it.
But nobody gave me $150,000 either. So... who's really to blame here?
fell for the oldest trick in the book
Here's a book on it, by the way
You what.
Not the brother's friend, his partner
oh it just keeps getting worse folks
OH MY GODS YOU DIDNT INCLUDE THE BEST PART. HE LEFT MOST OF HIS MONEY TO HIS PARTNER OF 10 YEARS BECAUSE THE FAMILY DIDN'T APPROVE OF HIM FOR BEING GAY BECAUSE "RELIGION".
They think just because they paid medical bills and funeral costs they should get all the money. They clearly didn't sportive of his relationship. They said "I don't know how his partner got ahold of the will". He probably gave his partner a copy knowing that his religious family that didn't approve of him being gay suitor pull this crap.
LGBTQ+ community. If you cut your family out of the will, be sure that you give a copy of your will to your partner/chosen family that must of your money will go to. So your family can't try to pull this crap.
-fae
also your bank. make a fucking note for your bank letting them know that x persons - despite having blood in common with you - don't get to touch your money.
and make sure you specify the executor of your will - not a family member still close with pushy bigot relatives, a friend or your partner.
To those who think this ay be trolling I believe I found a new article:
The biggest missed opportunity of hbomberguys video was not remaking the absolute classic
Fits topic and everything
imagine you're a fifth-grade teacher and one day a crow just flies into your classroom, steals some food, sits on some kid's head, and shouts "fuck off"
What asshole snitched!?
No, the story is even better than that! This crow lives outdoors, but he has a human family that rescued and raised him as a chick. He is highly vocal because he talks to his humans regularly.
They have some judgy neighbors though, who didn't love foulmouthed Cosmo, and who secretly captured him and took him to an animal rescue. He was eventually released far from from home.
When he came to this school? When he walked through all the classrooms telling the kids "what's up?" and "I'm fine"? He was looking for someone who could help him find his family.
Cosmo's home now, he was welcomed back and fed sardines, he doesn't visit the traitor neighbors anymore, and those kids got to take part in a wonderful story about friendship, corvid intelligence, and Christmas magic.
I want to be the first person on the moon to shoot a sniper rifle at earth and hit a wasp nest. my whole life so far is leading up to that moment
I know everyone’s seen this a million times, but it’s still SICK.
The origins of the mission status: sick image
I’m not exaggerating when I say this post changed my life. Seeing this as a terrified self hating 17 year old was like finding a fresh water lake in the middle of the Sahara.
If anyone is more interested in the work behind the Gävle goat there is apparently a documentary here, unfortunately mostly in swedish, but what I found most charming is that you can climb into the goat through a door in it's behind.
And if you ever wondered: yes, according to rumors a couple have fucked in the Gävle goat. In 1966 in fact, the first year it was up and before any kind of arson. I don't know why they threw that into the documentary but this goat has layers is all I'm saying.
just imagining going for a quickie in the goat and suddenly you're surrounded by flames
My cats have this meow that means "please come with me to fix this" after which they'll lead me to the problem in question, usually a empty (or 'empty') food bowl or a closed door they want open. They look at the 'problem', they look back at me, clear message.
What fascinates me is how this illustrates what they percieve as being in the realm of my 'power.' I control the food, I control the door, sure, but my cats love to sit on the balcony in the sun, and it has happened plenty of times that on a rainy day they come get me, go to the balcony and show me... the rain. "Please fix this" they say. "Please get rid of the wet"
"Silly kitty," I say, "I can't control the rain." I then walk into the shower and turn on the rain.
My cat absolutely does this. What’s more, she has learned that she can demand that one human fix the behavior of another human.
I was in the bathroom one day. The door was closed, which is of course a Crime Against Felinity. The cat had been complaining about this for several minutes. I told her I would be out in a few.
I then heard the “follow me” meow from down the hall, and my husband saying “what?”
The next thing I heard was my husband’s voice at the bathroom door. “The cat just led me right here, and now she’s looking at me like, ‘Here. You talk to her. She seems to listen to you.’”
Yes. My cat has learned to speak to the manager.
YOU GUYS IT’S DECEMBER 10TH YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THIS HAS BEEN IN MY QUEUE SINCE FEBRUARY
you have the rest of the day to reblog this
