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@ceciyou

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ebookporn

• An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.

• A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.

• A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

• An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

• Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”

• A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

• Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

• A question mark walks into a bar?

• A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

• Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."

• A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

• A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

• Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

• A synonym strolls into a tavern.

• At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

• A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.

• Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.

• A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

• An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

• The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

• A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

• A dyslexic walks into a bra.

• A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

• A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

• A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.

• A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony

- Jill Thomas Doyle

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neil-gaiman

A zeugma walked into a bar, my life and trouble.

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reblogged

quick everyone get your things back from the British museum while they’re distracted

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stellaluna33

I don't think a lot of filmmakers understand that a lot of the people who enjoy period dramas enjoy watching them for the same reason people enjoy watching foreign films. They LIKE seeing the differences in culture- it's something new and different and interesting. And if you take away those differences, what's the point? You take away one of the major aspects of what makes the experience appealing in the first place. For me, modernizing a period piece to make it more "palatable to a modern audience" is like the equivalent of American tourists who go to another country and insist on eating at the nearest McDonald's. What was even the point?

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londonsvenus

They really adapted a novel about someone bending to societal and familial pressures, a novel literally called PERSUASION and went ‘so the lead should be strong-willed and unconforming’ I’m going to scream.

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reblogged

Don't worry if your life is in chaos, you are like the universe itself and its law of entropy. もの久保 on Pivix

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tumblr is great and all but ya’ll are missing the woman in one of my cat fb groups that has birthed her own tier 1 meme

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ayo-edebiri

I need you.You’re my eyes and ears out here.

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014) dir. Marc Webb

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