noice

2 genres of fanfiction:

1) put that guy into situations

2) take that guy OUT of situations for the love of GOD let them REST 

LUCIUS IN THE TRAILER THIS IS NOT A FUCKING DRILL

Title: Love’s Messengers

Artist: Édouard Bisson

Date: 1856 - 1939

Genre: Portrait

sending people wikipedia articles is my favorite form of humor. one time a long time friend of mine asked why i was using a different name and acting different i sent him the wikipedia page for DID. ryder just asked me why its 108 degrees in nevada right now and i sent him the wikipedia page for global warming and the season of summer.

i see you all in the tags going "this is so funny" you better not steal my fucking bit. im copyrighting this joke

you cant do this to me

One thing I love about Judaism is that long involved conversations about things like “can a zombie attend shul?” or “can i use my pet dragon to light candles on shabbat?” or “is meat from a replicator kosher?” are seen as completely normal.

Yes, but it should avoid contact with a Cohen if it can, and if the dragon is a Gentile sure, why not, a pet dragon is an ideal Shabbos goy, since it probably lives with you, and will get a kick out of helping. If it’s a Jewish dragon, though, no, it’s better for you to do it yourself rather than cause another Jew to violate Shabbat.

Wait wait… if a jew owned the dragon as a pet wouldn’t using the beast’s labor to light candles be pretty explicitly prohibited?

Good point. Is the dragon property, or is it a roommate?

I think it was ruled that one may allow a dragon to ignite a fire if (a) the dragon is non-sapient, and preventing them from lighting the fire would be animal cruelty, or (b) the dragon is sapient, non-Jewish and not in indentured service.

And one cannot bring a dragon into a household for the express purpose of lighting candles at a later date, since the Jew would be directly benefiting from the dragon’s actions on Shabbat. 

But if the dragon just happens to live there already and feels the urge to light candles, it should not be stopped from doing so – as the sages said: “the same candle that benefits one can be used to benefit one hundred.“ (Shulchan Aruch HaRav, 276:6) 

This was a thrill from start to finish.

Just Tommy Miller enjoying watching his nieces give his brother shit.

Eddie; I’M BREAKING THE WINDOW!!

Trina; Emergency assistance, this is Trina

Steve; WE LOCKED OUR BABY IN THE CAR AND PEOPLE ARE JUDGING US!!

Dustin vibing in the car; :D

Eddie; I SWEAR TO GOD I’M GONNA BREAK IT!

Steve; DO NOT BREAK THE WINDOW YOU’LL GET GLASS ON HIM.

Trina; Sir please tell your wife to relax. Everything is going to be ok.

Steve; That’s a man.

Joe Keery as WALTER “KEYS” McKEY FREE GUY 2021, dir. Shawn Levy

Mario: *in the warp zone trying to calm Luigi down* "Nothing can hurt us as long as we're together!"

Luigi: *literally holding back Bowser's fire blast with a man hole cover to protect Mario* "Nothing can hurt us as long as we're together!"

Me:

yellowjackets appreciation week 2023 day 3: favourite dynamic // grief

PEDRO PASCAL on Hot Ones

The Last of Us + text posts

Joel

Oh hi there, I’m Taika Waititi… Director, actor, performer, stunt performer, performer performer, caterer, and also data wrangler on movie sets. And when I’m not doing all of those things combined at once I’m also writing, as you can see, hit screenplays for Hollywood studios. 

Eddie Munson + Text Posts ♡