Wine glass full of Mac and cheese garnished with two dinosaur chicken nuggets.

ah yes, tumblr is “banning porn”, you know, “““porn”““, like that one time they had their bots tag basically all lesbian and trans blogs as ““““““porn”““““. i truly trust the clowns who run this website to not literally fuck this up in the most heinous way imaginable while desperately begging for apple to restore their shitty app

[robs a bank]

[robbery investigation reveals massive corruption in the highest levels of government]

Me: Goddamnit

I swiped my credit card on this vending machine and it said “no sale” and just spat out a dollar bill at me??

reblog the Money Dollar and a vending machine will bless you with miniscule wealth and extreme confusion

The world has fallen into ruin. Most countries have turned to anarchy, and those that haven’t are close to it. The greatest politicians have long stopped trying to help, knowing it’s useless. The people resign themselves to their fate, until one fateful day, he comes back. The one who would never give them up, never let them down.

Did I just get rick-rolled by a writing prompt tumblr

@dominatrixeditrix

oOOOOH SH*t !!!by AnatoFinnstark

@lesbianmeouch

Kittens!

…and their Mother

everytime a man raises his stupid ass voice out of no where i get to the urge to end his worthless life on the spot

If you see this

You were visited by the magic kitten of rest. Reblog to have a good night’s sleep.

Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue.

I have been waiting for this post all my life.

They are indeed purple, But one thing you’ve missed: The concept of “purple” Didn’t always exist.

Some cultures lack names For a color, you see. Hence good old Homer And his “wine-dark sea.”

A usage so quaint, A phrasing so old, For verses of romance Is sheer fucking gold.

So roses are red. Violets once were called blue. I’m hugely pedantic But what else is new?

My friend you’re not wrong About Homer’s wine-ey sea! Colours are a matter Of cultural contingency;

Words are in flux And meanings they drift But the word purple You’ve given short shrift.

The concept of purple, My friends, is old And refers to a pigment once precious as gold.

By crushing up molluscs From the wine-dark sea You make a dye: Imperial decree

Meant that in Rome, to wear purpura was a privilege reserved

For only the emperor!

The word ‘purple’, for clothes so fancy, Entered English By the ninth century

.

Why then are voilets Not purple in song? The dye from this mollusc, known for so long

Is almost magenta; More red than blue. The concept of purple is old, and yet new.

The dye is red, So this might be true: Roses are purple And violets are blue

.

While this song makes me merry, Tyrian purple dyes many a hue From magenta to berry And a true purple too.

But fun as it is to watch this poetic race The answer is staring you right in the face: Roses are red and violets are blue Because nothing fucking rhymes with purple.

IT GOT SO MUCH BETTER.

You too can learn to count with ds9 !

On the 9th day of Trekmas my t’hyla gave to me, Nine fancy dans, Eight prancing clones, Seven lovely ladies, Six politicians, Five gooood kiiiidsss, Four Infirmary patients, Three Ferengi, Two Scientists, and a Long Suffering Starfleet Captain!

When you see a girl out with her boyfriend and she is dressed up and he is wearing basketball shorts and a tshirt with a fish on it

a) do you really think someone would put all that time and energy into making an infinity stone jewelry piece if they didn’t know all about the infinity stones

b) I don’t see you putting all that time and energy into making an infinity stone jewelry piece, what have you contributed lately besides being a dick to people for no reason

c) who gives a shit if you can’t name all the stones, you’re allowed to enjoy the shit you enjoy without some whiney ass loser quizzing you to the smallest detail

restorative things

There are a bunch of people for whom bubble baths, scented candles, and chocolate is self-care. 

There are a bunch of people for whom early-morning yoga, vegetable smoothies, and aggressively minimalist redecorating is self-care.

There are a bunch of people for whom playing with kids is self-care, and a bunch of people for whom dressing up and going to a fancy restaurant where no kids are allowed is self-care, and a bunch of people for whom sleeping in late is self-care and a bunch of people for whom getting up early is self-care. 

Lately I’ve been moving from ‘yeah, humans are vast and varied’ to a sense that there’s a similar underlying thing in all of these cases.

I think something tends to be more restorative - to be an activity that leaves you more energized than you started it, more okay than when you started it - the more of these criteria it meets:

- restorative things are often things you associate with being prioritized, valued and valuable. This is why some people find chores restorative - it hits ‘valued and valuable’f or them - while other people find them draining - their association with doing chores is being incapable or not-good-enough or ordered-around,

- restorative things are usually things that don’t draw on the resources you feel constrained on - if you’re tired from being on your feet all day, running sure won’t do it, and if you’re lonely and isolated then bubble baths probably won’t help. Dong stuff that causes you anxiety won’t often be restorative.

- restorative things tend to fit into your understanding of what a good life for you looks like. early-morning yoga works for people who find it empowering to think of themselves as someone who does early-morning yoga. prayer and attending religious services tends to work for people who are like ‘my best self attends religious services’ and not so well for people ho are like ‘ugh I’m supposed to do that’ or ‘doing that just reminds me how much I disagree with my community about what my best self looks like’

- restorative things are pleasant in their own right. It’s astonishing how often this one gets passed-over. If you do not enjoy something - if the experience of doing it isn’t a good experience - then it’s really unlikely to be restorative. Making yourself do yoga when you find every minute awful will not be restorative. It might sometimes be valuable but it won’t be restorative. (Things that are unpleasant to start, but pleasant and rewarding once you’re doing them, can be restorative).

I think there are a couple takeaways from this framework. One is hopefully to make it easier to identify things that’ll be restorative for you. The second is that people attach a lot of moral valence to which activities other people find restorative - accusing people of being consumerist or selfish or lazy or privileged - and I’m hoping that there might be less of it if people are aware that the things that work for them won’t work for everyone. (Related to that,of course privilege plays a role in which things you experience as making you valued and valuable, and which things you conceive of as being part of your good life. So it’s a terrible idea to try to impose one version of ‘self-care’, like employers signing employees up for exercise programs in the name of self-care; people of a different class background get particularly screwed by this.)

POEM “Tale of the Luminaries” a/w 2018-2019 collection