Her hand skims over the training sabers, choosing one that looked to have a reasonable imitation of the heft of her own weapon. Naturally, it wouldn’t be quite right, but it should be similar enough. Turning and stepping away, the Padawan glanced back at Havik.

"The line falls where both sides place it— or would place it. It’s also moved by the masses, by the media, by anyone who can sway the tide in one direction or another without a shred of sensitivity— or even those who are powerful in the Force."

Circling again, the redhead left room for Havik to choose a training saber, adjusting to the extra weight in her own hands. “When a Jedi can no longer be considered one is when the line has been crossed, and likely far too many times.”

A smile, almost wistful, drifted across her features then, “Perhaps, but if we break the small rules, eventually the large ones, the ones truly meant to keep disaster from befalling one, or the Order at large, will be broken as well.”

It’s been a while since she sparred with someone. It should prove interesting at the least.

Havik can't help nodding along to her words, lips twitching as if his smile could grow any wider. He continued to listen as he walked to retrieve his own weapon, holding back his protest to Eryn. A Jedi remains a Jedi to the death, even if their ideals have been twisted. At least, that was his opinion, one not often shared between other students. After all, opinions were fickle things. Green, calculating eyes scan over the assortment of training sabers, hand quickly grasping the one he deems acceptable. The blond didn't much care if it was most alike to his own saber, or if it wasn't. He's never been great at sparring, and there wasn't much to do but give Eryn a challenge.

He turns to pad to where the woman stands, watching as she finishes speaking before his voice once again begins to resonate. "But disaster will happen either way. Small rules and large rules are, essentially, the same. Not in degree, but in purpose. One day, someone else is going to think this and I can assure you, that day the Order is going to go into a frenzy." A faint chuckle follows after, and a shrug lifts his shoulder as Havik switches his grip of the weapon to his other, more dominant hand. "The Order isn't a big fan of variables, which is why they create rules. If everyone abides by them, there is no fear of difference, yeah?"

Rush’s reply was delayed, a thousand yard stare filled his face. He leant forward, placing his head in his hands, sighing heavily as he did so. Was it all really worth it?  "I don’t know any more Havik…"

The hand shielding his eyes fell away, moving to clasp Rush's shoulders in what Havik hoped was a friendly gesture. "Time will tell and, yeah, that sounds pretty horrible when all I see is this blasted war going on...But you won. Your men knew what they were getting into..."

It sounded weak, even to his own ears. He's never been one to try and comfort against his own thoughts, his own reasoning. But Rush seemed like he needed some reassurance right about now, however false it was.

"They died for this victory. Remember that."

"You’re going to argue the points of view thing?" Eh, she didn’t mind. It was a kind of banter that provoked thought, and keeping it up without being dropped within the first few seconds of the sparring match—on either side of it—would be interesting.

Rolling her eyes at Havik, Eryn stepped into the room, boots sinking ever so slightly into the mat. “I think, in the long run, the people have to decide who the ‘bad guys’ are. The Jedi are sworn to the people, but we sure have had our handfuls go rogue, causing damage while under the name of Jedi.”

Circling the room to reach the center, the Padawan shucked her boots, finding it easier to work without them in this situation, “In the Archives, there are records of Sith, few though they had been, preferring to strike peace for unknown reasons.”

There were training sabers across the room, settled in their shelf on the wall, and it was those she padded toward.

"But there are good reasons why the Order doesn’t want Jedi using the dark side."

She was right, of course, but that didn't mean he had to exactly agree. "Dark side or not, you said it yourself. Where does one draw the line at being a Jedi and being Sith? Is a Jedi only a Jedi because they train under the roof of the Temple? Is a Jedi still a Jedi once they go rouge? Think about it, Eryn. And once you have, tell me what you think."

Force, he's starting to talk like his master. Not necessarily a bad thing, but definitely unwanted. Green eyes watch as the woman walked towards a shelf, the training sabers there reminding him of how much younger she was than him. 

She would make a wonderful Jedi. In time, that is.

Shoulders roll and arms outstretch, a sigh escaping the blond's lips as he does it. Ever since he got out of his earlier 'dispute', his body has been begging for a nice chance to relax. Obviously this wasn't exactly relaxing, per say, but the satisfying pop of joints certainly feels like it now.

"The Order doesn't want a lot of things, and not all are as bad as using the dark side. Yeah, rules are rules, but certain ones need to be broken in order to obtain an end result. One thing the Order doesn't seem to understand."

Coming Home || niner1309

His hair had grown matted and his chin was studded with evidence from lack of shaving. If it weren’t for his hard stare and squared chin, he would have looked like he came straight out of the bush. 

His brothers were celebrating, patting each other on the back and squawking like school kids. Niner had been looking up at the ceiling, lips pursed, as he waited for some joke about him to die down. A faint smile tugged at his lips. He wasn’t necessarily expecting to see Havik, but his hopes had risen.

“Niner!”

Deployment makes you miss the simple things. Hairbrushes, warmth, safety… people. His name hadn’t been said like that for over a year. It was cheery yet somewhat attentive, and ended with a tinge of laughter. Niner’s heart fluttered. He locked his gaze locked with Havik’s.

It had a year since they saw each other. What was the appropriate response? Should he give Havik a hug? Or was it too early for that kind of thing? Had Havik remained loyal? He found his throat clenching at the thought. Things were different now, but how much, he didn’t know.

He decided to offer a courteous smile and a nod. His gaze towards Havik had caught the attention of his brothers. They slowly dispersed, leaving Niner with no choice but to approach the padawan. 

His hands fell awkwardly to his sides. “Long time no see.”

It was...different. Havik had been expecting something more, something...less hostile, though by no means was that smile, the one he'd missed for ages, unwelcome. With a crooked smile and a glint in his eyes that spoke of nothing good, the blond quickly wrapped his arms around Niner, holding him tightly to himself for a few moments before letting go.

"Yeah, and I take it you've forgotten how to say hello in all that time." 

His smile only grew as he let green eyes roam, noticing the changes the other now had. With a small chuckle, a hand was raised to tap the stubble scattered about on the soldier's chin, brows lifting in question.

"I think someone needs a little shave, hrm?" It's said with a teasing lit, the blond dropping his hand after a few more moments. It was such a relief to see Niner again, a year's worth of desperate wishing and anxious thoughts seemingly vanishing from his shoulders. He's missed this, missed him. And, of course, there was always the nagging thought of what would happen if his soldier didn't return. He doubted he would ever catch word of it, stuck in that awful limbo of a life for who knew how long.

Havik felt his throat closing and, without thought this time, once again brought his arms around his soldier, willing himself not to make a fool of himself.

"...I've missed you."

Below the cold, horrid feelings of guilt and self-loathing, anger burned inside Bliz. He stood up again, that night replaying itself in his memory.

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Havik listened intently as always, steadily growing more and more unnerved at Bliz's words. The moment he said that they couldn't jeopardize the mission, a scoff left the Jedi's lips without any warning.

"Mission or not, your commander was late to an appointed time. That meant that something, no matter what, was wrong. Kriff the mission, Bliz. You and your men should have went in there, should have found her as soon as things looked bad."

He knows he's being too hard on the other, but it seemed so ridiculous. What did they assume? That she got sidetracked and decided to small-talk one of the Senators? It didn't seem likely anyhow. Whatever their mission, she had missed a possible check-in. That's suspicious enough.

"Well, you assumed wrong." Havik snapped, crossing his arms and trying to get his rising anger under control. "She was your responsibility and you didn't even try."

Feet stalked forward the soldier, eyes sharp in their gaze. He didn't to calm down, stop harassing Bliz for what obviously wasn't his fault. With a deep breath, the Jedi continued, tone less inditing than before. "Human rules out a lot of other Senators, hair colour as well. There'll be more than one suspect, but I'll sooner be dead than let this lunatic go free."

He'll have his own time to talk to Bliz later. Now, he was focused on the man who had committed the atrocity.

"How do you know I couldn’t possibly love my child?" Kiki’s voice was almost shrill, her breathing beginning to grow out of control.

"This baby and Verocia are the only things I have, Havik! My child is the only normal thing about me! I don’t care if I’m a Jedi or not, or whether this is Verocia or not; I’m having this baby!” Her determination was set firmly in her eyes.

"You’re not going to change my mind, Havik."

The blond sighs, unable to stop from pacing as he listened. It was hopeless, he knew, but he couldn't give up on her. It wasn't in his nature to do so, anyway. He's made a promise to protect the people of the galaxy and, Force, he was gonna do just that.

"And then what?" Havik seethed, resisting the urge to throw up his hands in frustration. "You have this child and then you...Settle down? Find some nice home where you can raise your child in peace, is that it? Because I can promise you one thing, Kiki, this incident, this problem, won't go away that easily. You need to think for yourself and not the child."

Rush visibly winced as he took a seat on a crate, “Hav, trust me when I say- theres no kind of training for the amount of AA guns these droids had. Shot us to bits mid-air, murdered the rest of us on the ground- ‘Soka and I made it out with about a third of what we went in with. We won though.”

As Rush went on, Havik could feel his face drop, a tired hand rising to shield his eyes away from the other. He gave a sigh, shaking his head to himself as he thought of what to say. 

He never did like hearing about the casualties this war demanded from each side, even if they had won. True, it would of been worse if there wasn't a victory to be celebrated, but there were also funerals to be held as well.

"Was it worth it? Worth losing all those men?"

MAKE ME CHOOSE | supercavillskryptonite asked: Darth Vader or Darth Maul? (Vader is obviously my favorite, but I always make gifs of him, so have some Maul for a change)

Kiki could feel color draining from her face as her anger piked. “I would never end my child’s life.” Her hands tightened into fists around her stomach.

"I don’t know about you, but on Verocia we care for our children! If the father doesn’t want to care for their child, then she will either give it up of adoption or take care of it!” She could feel her baby reacting to the rush of negative emotions in the Force.

"Right now I don’t care what my baby’s father plans to do."

Teeth grit together, breathing harder to control as he listened to Kiki. Yes, he understood traditions and culture. Yes, he understood life was a sacred and beautiful thing. But she was a Jedi, a woman who had the whole galaxy at her fingertips. With a child? She wouldn't be able to reach those far away stars.

"I care for children just as much as you do, but there are options we--You--must think about. This isn't Verocia, understand? This isn't some test of honour or respect. This is about your life and your health. Don't risk yourself for a child you couldn't possibly love."

Bliz was silent, leaning back against the wall and crossing his arms. “The pregnancy…was completely out of her control. She…she…” Bliz felt disgusted even saying it. “She didn’t tell anyone for four months because she didn’t want to be kicked out of the Order.”

Bliz looked at Havik, different emotions warring on his face. He was angry because of the selfish decisions Kiki decided to make by still going into battle , heavy grief because of the hell Kiki must have been going through, and he was powerless to stop it.

He felt confused since he had no control over what she did, and this situation was nowhere near anything he’d been trained for on Kamino.

There was guilt, such heavy guilt. He’d been on the mission with her, Crusade Squad as well. It had taken her much longer to get back from the late-night senator’s party.

He’d commed her once and assumed she was busy.

Bliz’s plastoid armor slipped against the durasteel wall, his entire body sagging. He sat on the ground, head heavy in his hands.

"I don’t know what to do, Havik," he said.

His anger from moments ago faded away, leaving the blond feeling drained and much more tired than before. Bliz's words barely registered at first, and when they finally clicked together, Havik felt shock begin to wrap around his body as if in a vice.

There was no way Bliz meant--Oh Force, he shouldn't have gotten so mad...

Green eyes turned to gaze at the floor, breathing even when the walls around him felt too close. Who would do something like this? Who would treat Kiki like that? Like she was nothing but for them to use. A sour taste in the back of his throat lingered, and it took all his strength to swallow against it.

"I'll tell you what we do," He started, vision trailing to the man slumped to the ground. "We catch that shabuir and make him stand for his crimes. Make him suffer for what he did."

To be honest, if Havik would have his own way, whoever had done such horrid acts deserved death, if not more.

"Kiki didn't deserve that."

Certainly not as good as an outdoors area, but sparring on the Temple roof was hardly such a good idea. And there was plenty of space within the room as it was.

Brows lift in concern as he grumbles about ‘his business’, but given that he appeared to have shrugged it off, Eryn’s worry doesn’t linger long. “Welll…” And she shrugs, grinning again, “you can’t have it both ways.”

There’s a split second as Havik’s hand settles on her head before she ducks and steps to the side, pretending to make a fuss about fixing her hair—which really hadn’t been mussed in the first place.

"Aren’t the big bad Jedi supposed to be the good guys?"

He chuckles, shrugging in answer to her question. "That's what they tell us. Not every Jedi is exactly pure, y'know. And it's not like I have a reputation for picking fights."

Truth be told, hew knew he did. He never instigated them with physical attacks, and more than not only fought for self defense. But in the city word spreads fast, and most people don't care if you were outnumbered or if you never threw a single punch. If you were in a fight, you fought.

"Besides, aren't the Sith just like Jedi? Just with a different look on life. Same attributes, same disciplines...Different purposes. And aren't they the bad guys to us, hrm?"

Havik gives a teasing smirk, brows rising in question. He could go on about the theoretical likeness between the two factions for days, most of the masters aware of that tick. The blond just couldn't help it most of the time.

He laughs again, moving forward a few steps before turning to glance at the other. "If we're gonna do this, I think we both need to be in the room, Eryn."