hey i have 387 mostly-dead followers and this blog is very old and i Regret,,, So, i made a new blog !! it is @teasplat !! (just one 't' and not two) this blog won't be active anymore so if you'd like the dumb shit i reblog, give me a follow over there.
honestly? im done with the lies. being little spoon fuckign sucks okay? it really does. its hot and sweaty and cramped and you better believe that arm wrapped around you is gunna go from “acceptable foreign weight” to “there is a literal blue whale colony collapsed atop you” in about 2 minutes flat. yall forreal want a FLESH BLANKET encasing you??? a goddamn slab prison of human skin and Person Tissue draped across your corporeal form??? find a God and grovel for redemption.
being big spoon though? divine. precious. it grants the sensation of being a benevolent egg white, swaddled loosely within your blanket shell as you in turn cradle the precious yolk within your grasp. you are a sublime deity of warmth and comfort, one who may bestow your blessing on any mortal you deem fit. an unparalleled joy to perform.
and you can grab a tit ty
can yall please stop reblogging this post i made after eating three entire packages of marshmallow peeps washed down with a near-deadly amount of nyquil
Just say you’re a top and move on OP
How much is 0kg in pounds?
habibi…
For Pride month Chella Man and I decided to teach QUEER sign language! Thank you them. For more —> bit.ly/2J2SIuZ
Follow me: instagram.com/nyledimarco
I’m crying
old boys
it took me 3 times reading this post to realized that (wild) meant living in the wild and wasn’t just a casual remark on the longevity of these organisms
Maximum longevity: 15,000 years (shit dude)
15,000 years isnt shit when it comes to geologic time
Y’all r wildin OUT
No but have you seen king julien?
The artist is Crazy Tom
my brain record scratched
y’all
look up the artist there’s so much more of this
Listen the art is beautiful and these drawings are wicked talented but I would deeply appreciate if yall would not try to get me sexually interested in the cast of Madagascar….
When someone with a bad connection is trying to yell at you in the chat
@zerogramsfat my entire face hurts
We love the Power Pop Girls™️
this is the funniest text I have ever received from my dad
Oh thank the gods
You could always nip it in the butt too if that makes you happy.
A muscley man: jogging past in the summer heat with no shirt and baggy athletic shorts
Me:
That same muscley man: *stops in front of my window to stretch*
Me:
