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hi, how are you?

@tokillamocking / tokillamocking.tumblr.com

Harley. 25. Austin.
I like books and my puppy. I'm a small ball of of anxiety with crazy hair.
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Gomez gives out better relationship advice than like 90% of dudes.

Gomez Addams is a suave motherfucker who loves his wife more than his own life.

Everyone should want a Gomez. He’s p cool.

Gomez and Morticia Addams actually have a very loving and extremely healthy relationship, both in the old TV show and in the more recent movies. They were also one of the first television couples to be shown to have an active (albeit offscreen) sex life. Their frank attitude towards sexuality was shocking in its’ time, but their relationship and their family dynamic is actually more functional and more…dare I say it…sane than most families portrayed on TV.

The comedy in the show came from the family’s “odd” lifestyle, rather than from infighting and petty bickering, or worse, as was common on other shows of the time, thinly veiled references to spousal abuse. They didn’t make fun of each other or act like their children were creatures from another world. Were they strange and outside of social norms? Yes. Were they united in creating a loving home and being good, supportive parents? Absolutely.

These two support and adore their children, care for an aging mother and an estranged brother, put family before everything, and they love each other, wholly, fiercely, without reserve. They are every bit as much in love after at least a decade of marriage as they were the day they met.

Relationship goals. LIFE goals.

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avotica

Just remembered in the second movie when their third child became “normal” for a period and although they were shocked and didn’t know how to handle it, they didn’t mistreat the child or love it any less. They accepted the difference, even though it was hard for them. 

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drnerdlove

Reblogged for truth.

❤️❤️❤️

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endreal

Posts about Gomez and Morticia Addams are almost always uplifting and I’m happy to have them on my dash, but I think my favorite bit about this conversation is what Gomez is actually saying to Fester.

It’s nobody’s surprise that many of the aesthetic and thematic elements of The Addams Family in its various incarnations are influenced by Gothic tradition (not goth, that mostly came later. And not Goth, that was much much much too early), and I think Gomez’s words are a dead bullseye in terms of Gothic mentality.

“Make her feel like she’s the most sublime creature on earth”

The sublime is a recurring theme throughout Gothic literature. Although the word (like “awesome”) has lost a lot of it’s original luster over the intervening decades, sublime doesn’t really mean elevated and lofty (or even heavenly) as it’s often used today, but rather something possessing the power and grandeur to induce awe and veneration in the mind of the beholder. Although less than divine, something sublime possessed a wildness and power that transcended human ability to control…or even to comprehend.

Sublime is standing at the edge of the Grand Canyon leaning as far as you dare over the railing and still not being able to see the canyon floor below. Sublime is warrior-queen Galadriel being tempted by the One Ring. Sublime is waking up in the middle of the night in the heart of a wild thunderstorm.

“Make her feel like she’s the most sublime creature on earth”

Gomez isn’t advising Fester to treat a woman he fancies like a princess, or even elevate her to pedestal of angelic nature (who’s idea was it to equate femininity with purity anyway? What a laughable and historically damaging idea. Shame on whatever dead (probably) white dudes promoted that!)

Gomez is advising Fester that if he truly loves a woman he must do everything he can to remind her of how she’s an untameable force of nature who’s grandeur brings him to his knees in awe and terror. Just like Morticia, for Gomez.

I’ll sign off with one of my most favorite quotes of all time, because it feels suddenly very relevant:

“When I find myself surrounded by so much beauty, I feel as if I am the eye of a hurricane.”
- -Sanjay Kulkarni

❤️❤️❤️❤️

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You know when dogs sit outside with their face turned towards the sun and their eyes closed and they look so relaxed and when you pet them they’re warm that’s how I want to feel always

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reblogged
Gryffindor: You look tired.
Ravenclaw: Yeah, I keep having anxiety dreams, nbd.
Gryffindor: ???If that’s not a big deal, then what is???
Ravenclaw: Well my favorite pen broke and I haven’t been the same since.
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this morning I pictured our lives together

I envisioned content sighs and booming laughter

I saw us teaching our kids how to tend to their bodies like watering flowers

this morning I dreamed of our lives together

I heard a storm brewing loud enough to shake our house

I made out you whispering that my demons couldn’t take me away

this morning I imagined our lives together

I felt how consumed with love we would be until we withered away

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There’s this sadness that grows deep in my heart.

Like roses blooming in the spring.

But the roots are as thick as a willow tree and crack me open.

There’s this loneliness that suffocates me.

Like tubs over flowing with water

But instead of spilling out it fills up my lungs.

There’s a darkness that makes the room stale

Like all my happiness is evaporating in thin air

But it eventually bounces off the ceiling filling my body again.

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Today I’m 25, and I tossed and turned all night

Because I couldn’t stop thinking if the radio silence would end

If today would be the year that my birthday wish came true

If I’d hear from you even if your voice cracked like static and I could barley decipher your words

I tossed and turned all night with blurry dreams of you.

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Today someone told me “bye lady”

And my heart stopped

And my hands grew clammy

Because in the moment I heard you whisper those words in my ear

Bye lady

I reached out... but you were already gone

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I miss you immensely this morning.

The way you throw your head back in a cackle.

Your use of “nutcracker” and “numpty”

You’re insanely large medical vocabulary that has me shouting out to google for help.

I miss your Harry Potter rants and hearing you belittle the ignorant people of the world.

I miss you spit fire.

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My heart broke today when I realized that I won’t be there to support my soulmate on the day she gets married or the day she goes into labor. I won’t be there to support her on her happiest day. Or hold her up on worse days. Although I hadn’t been holding her up in years. I’ll always regret that. I’m sorry, Marcy.

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