AND repeat.

Perspective. 

“Looting? I thought these were supposed to be nonviolent protests”

I know it’s incredible! People are literally coming out of the woodwork to comment on this photoset to focus on the looting headline with “well yes it is nice they were helping people hit with the tear gas, but stealing is still wrong uwu” as if they’re back to kindergarten morality.

Like everyone who’s gone to boot camp I’ve been tear gassed. They put about 50+ of you in a gas chamber and toss it in. You have to stay there until your rank is allowed to exit. Before that though, you have to say your name, rank, and social security number. You then exit and file into ranks (again) outside and are not allowed at any point to rinse your face or eyes for the entire day.

That right there? Easily the worst part of boot camp. My eyes were literally swollen shut. I was blinded for a good 30 minutes and my chest hurt for days.

I have zero problem and not and ounce of judgement for people raiding a mcdonalds that can easily afford to repair damage for ANYTHING to help ease the shittiness that is being tear gassed. Esp because every one of us in boot were medically sound to deal with tear gas. Children, asthmatics, people prone to panic and anxiety attacks, the elderly as sooo many more are NOT going to handle tear gas well at ALL.

Or that smoke the police use either.

It’s easy to sit there and judge someone from the safety of your home and say things like “it’s just tear gas” or “it can’t be that bad”.

Fuck you. As someone who HAS been gassed, you need to stfu.

I remember all the preparation they did to get us ready for the gas chamber in boot camp. We were taught how to handle ourselves, how to control our breathing, not to touch anything, how to avoid the worst of the gas. But it still didn’t matter. I remember taking in that first breath and feeling like I had just been kicked in the chest. I remember a few guys in my platoon falling down and vomiting. We knew the gas wasn’t as bad on the floor but we were the fifth platoon through and the vomit kept us from bending over more than absolutely necessary. I remember a few guys, guys in peak health training to be infantrymen, breaking ranks and running for the door only to be dragged back in kicking and screaming until they said name, rank and serial. They were expecting it, trained for it, bragging about how it wouldn’t bother them. I remember standing there with all of the mucus from my nasal cavity on the front of my ACUs and thinking to myself “This is the nonviolent option?” Covered head to toe and my skin still itching I looked down at the silver wedding band hanging next to my dog tags and realized that the gas had eaten little pits into its surface. I stood there and thought of all the news reports I had seen over the years. The uprisings and revolutionaries being gassed, the crowds running from men in masks. That’s the moment I got it, staring at my ruined wedding band, that’s the moment I realized terrorism isn’t about bombs or who is using them. It’s about controlling people through fear. It’s about removing their ability to act reasonably, to make them seem like the monsters. Terrorism is about triggering people to fight or flight then blaming them for not being rational. It’s about power. Remove someone’s power to act with reason, and you remove their humanity.

Oh fuck

My god this commentary is perfect. Also a reminder that it turned out this “looting” was not that at all, the police bust that window with a bullet and the staff were gracious enough to hand milk out it seems, the protestors did not break in but even if they did just look at what they were trying to do with that milk, look at what they went through. The immense endurance that’s been shown by the people of Ferguson in the face of all this is incredible.

I don’t know if that’s meant in a metaphorical way as in, “their insults have no bite” or a literal sense as in “someone was talking shit so he got his fucking teeth knocked out” but I like it either way

yk I haven’t met anyone with adhd who isn’t just a fucking comedian like I think everyone with adhd just has the best sense of humor

we gotta be funny so people don’t get annoyed with us as much

Who I think I am vs. who I actually am

this may be the most accurate post I’ve ever seen

this is a strong contender for the funniest post i have ever seen in my life

Bottom surgery was a success afafsgsgsgagagagshs

To be perfectly clear, the scare tactic article titles that are all like “SONY IS PATENTING THE ANIMATION STYLE USED IN SPIDER-MAN: INTO THE SPIDERVERSE” are… all completely untrue.

The pending patent is for the software they used to make the movie, a software their company created and which they have complete right to patent in the same way videogame companies patent game engines and computer companies patent operating systems.

Article titles like this are either incompetent journalism, clickbait, or blatant attempts to get people to blacklist the film in a blind rage, and they are absolutely not representative of the actual circumstances.

how to compliment someone without seeming like a fucking creep. an easy how to guide:

a) compliment them on something that they can change. don’t say ‘nice tits janice’, say something like ‘your shoes are rad’ or ‘your hair looks great’.

b) don’t be a fucking creep. if it’d weird you out if it was said to you, then it’s likely too creepy to say to someone else.

EASY.

also this pic is super strawmanny and gross. it is not hard to not be a creep.

My most favorite compliment I’ve ever gotten I got from a man who was a complete stranger who drove up next to me while I was walking home at 9pm in the night:

I guess he saw me speed walk, overtake, then completely outpace some really tall business man in front of me (who had also increased his speed to overtake me back but failed).

Anyway this complete stranger doing the exact stereotype of what a man shouldn’t ever do drove up next to me, rolled down the window and said:

“That is the fastest damn walking I’ve ever seen. Ma’am, you…have the soul…of a bicycle.”

Then rolled up his window and drove away.

He didn’t creepily drive behind me, he drove regular speed and came to a rolling stop. He didn’t roll down his window all the way or stick his head out, he said his piece quickly and with a great amount of awe and respect, then he didn’t act like he needed a response from me or expect anything from the compliment. And then he left as quickly as he came. The compliment was so good and politely delivered that I’ve thought about it with amusement for over a year.

It is NOT HARD to not be threatening to women. Those who can’t manage it are sus as hell.

That is one hell of a compliment.

fewer bisexuals who are suave and seductive

more bisexuals who are incredibly awkward around their same-sex crushes b/c they were never taught how to flirt in gay

post cancelled, i’ve been made aware of the fact that none of you messy bi bitches capable of flirting in straight either

You’re completely correct.

this will forever be my favorite joke in this entire fucking game

But seriously, give money

And it’s way better food, too, anything you get prepackaged has A TON of sugar and/or salt in it…collecting cans may be more exciting than writing a check, but if the point is to help people, the check is going to get a lot more done

Yoooooo heads up for those of you with kids, I know this time of year schools start holding canned food drives so keep this in mind if you’re able to give.

collecting cans may be more exciting than writing a check, but if the point is to help people, the check is going to get a lot more done .

hint: the point should be to help people.

when Ellen came out, the backlash was so harsh that she didn’t work for three years. lesbians were man-hating dyke perverts, to be kept away from children and from the public eye, and she was treated like it. when she did get back into the industry, she struggled to come back as anything more than The Lesbian who had caused all that controversy. people hated her, and by proxy hated Oprah (and sent her racist threats and insults) for her role in Ellen’s coming out.

so it’s no wonder that when she got the chance Ellen took up a talk show that allowed her to build a reputation as a friendly, happy, and utterly harmless character. since coming out, she has steered almost explicitly away from politics, especially from focusing too much on being a lesbian. she is just a friendly, smiling, liberal-leaning and generous talk show host, almost apolitical and tiptoeing around controversy where her peers (Stephen Colbert, James Corden, Conan O’Brien, John Oliver, Trevor Noah, etc.) have been able to be explicitly political.

when the Ellen netflix special comes out, I think we’re gonna see Ellen be political, be controversial, be crass or snarky or daring in ways that break severely with what we think Ellen’s personality is. And frankly, I want us all to be so ready for it, because the woman has waited so long–has seen an entire generation come and go–just to be able to be an open, successful, controversial lesbian, and i want her to be loved for it

So, if you’re like me and work in a place with public bathrooms, you most likely have seen this shit before. Some racist fuck graffiti’d up your bathroom with nazi bullshit with a permanent marker.

Tired of this bullshit? Me too, so I’m gonna show you how to get rid of it nice and quick! 

The tools you need: A cleaner appropriate for the surface, the appropriate tool to to wipe said surfaces, and the crucial piece: A dry erase marker.

It’s embarrassingly easy to get rid of and is gonna make those nazi fucks upset that we don’t tolerate their bullshit. 

Just grab your marker…

…and draw over it

then you spray it with your cleaner and then… wipe

ta-fucking-da

now you too can use your new-found hack to get rid of sharpie graffiti

remember kids: fuck fascists, fuck nazis and racists, and fuck white supremacy 

I love this show

This cracks me up. He is so embarrassed still about the music thing. The homophobia is THEIR problem.

My desired aesthetic

Heathers (1988)