(Keep calm and wish yourself a happy birthday…)

(HAPPY BIRTHDAY KEI~!!!)

(I messed up on the transparency OTL and idk if I’m late on his bday or not so…. better than nothing~!!)

reinapepiada

LOOK AT THIS IT'S SO IMPORTANT

IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GIVE ME GIFTS!!! MAKE ME A PARTY!!! YOU CAN MAKE ME A SURPRISE PARTY I DON’T EVEN CARE JUST!!!!!

MY BIRTHDAY!!!

Gross? Me? Actually, my insides are pretty cute, especially compared to yours!

Your insides are just goopy meringue or something, I’m sure. Compared to mine, they’d be lacking in form, finesse, color, and beauty! Even in my sorry state, I still had you outclassed. But I guess it’s not surprising! Your ingredients are just as poor as your style of living, and it’s no surprising your insides would be just as unappetizing as your behavior.

But I suppose it can’t be helped. Whatever helps you sleep at night, right? It’s not as if people would go to such great lengths to obtain you the same way they have for me.

ah, ignorance really pisses me off.

how can you call yourself-- why-- it's just. "goopy meringue"????? you don't know anything about pies, do you? you might be doing it on purpose, but i think you're still a dumb kid, so

this is the problem when you sleep with everyone. you don't pick up a BOOK and READ it.

go READ a fucking RECIPE BOOK and stop FUCKING PEOPLE for like once in your LIFE. STOP. STOP THINKING ABOUT SEX. it's for your own good you little sex fiend. i don't even know what you're trying to accomplish here anymore???

Is it so strange for you to think that?

Is it so strange to think that people would want me no matter how I am, unlike you? I know it must be an entirely foreign experience to you, but people find me appealing in any state, inside and outside ♥ Meanwhile, the number of people you have lusting after you at any point in time is … one? One and a half, maybe, on one of your better days? Doesn’t that get a little bit unsatisfying? I worry about you, you know.

hahahaha see, see, you can be really cute. sometimes. it makes me remember you're just a child.

people lust after me! of course they do! most people, actually. but i don't let just anyone touch me, because i'm very, very good and i'm not dying for people to touch me. quite the contrary, actually. someone as good as me shouldn't be touched by so many different, imperfect people.

so yeah. it is strange that people would like you "inside and outside", especially because you have pretty gross insides, dude.

…

I’ve been just fine, thanks so much for caring ♥ Or, rather, you don’t, do you? I shouldn’t be so presumptuous. In fact, I’ve been presumptuous to think you haven’t thought of me at all, so unfortunately I have to admit I’d done the same I assumed of you — which is to say, I totally forgot about you! But I’m sure since you’re so magnanimous you’ll forgive me.

How’s your girlfriend? I hope her lusting after a dead dessert hasn’t made bedroom affairs awkward.

i do care, why would i not? we're friends! but you never had good taste, or a good anything. i did forget about that... the one i missed was far nicer and, well, had his intestines out. actually maybe he wasn't nice but he did have his intestines out.

but you talk about lusting after dead people like you know about it! could it be you're so successful that people lust after you everytime you die? hmm, it's hard to picture. i'm not very convinced. has it happened recently?

I’d ask if I missed anything, but I know I didn’t. At least tell me you guys were busy having affairs or something interesting.

old friend!

i thought you were dead! well, the last time i saw you you weren't in a good shape, it's surprising you're still around! i've thought about you, like, once every month, so that's why i remember very well the last time we met.

how have you been?

i took more pics bc i’m proud of my pie

pizza’s drunk ??????????

 no

HE’S A CANNIBAL…………?!

alright that’s it

don’t talk to him anymore

he’s a lost cause

EHHEH

Wh Y cant wE ALL JU ST GET ALONG AND NOT EAT EACH TOHER

let's just g--

wh--

...

...!!!

i am going to rip off his tongue