this site definitely doesn't allow you to paste the link to any article blocked by a paywall (say, a NYT article) so that you can read it free of charge! that would be illegal and would benefit broke college students too much. it definitely does not do that. promise.
me reading 150k+ fanfic: eh only 3am i could probably finish this tonight
me reading half a sentence of the assigned texts: ive literally never been so exhausted in my life my head hurts so bad i cant do this anymore-
Planets: Life
Stars: Experiences
Constellations: Favourites
Galaxies: Love/Friends
Other stuff: Wishes
i, a lesbian, took this uquiz about men and literally had to take a minute when i saw the result. like full on exhale sit-back hands-clasped-over-face a minute
take it and you might see why
ahahshsusbebvshshdbsLMAO
Pfffffffft
To everyone who is still studying despite the pandemic, I’m so fucking proud of you.
To everyone who isn’t studying because, well, we are in the midst of a pandemic and it’s hard to focus, it’s okay.
Studying or coping, either way, I’m so proud of you and keep going.
Love, Ax
Felt the need to reblog this again nearly a year later. Keep it up, it’s hard but worth it.
as a Certified Germaphobe i really think the west should really adopt the trend of wearing face masks when they’re sick tbh
shit fuck i’m so sorry i’m so sorry i’m so
Y'know, whenever people want to talk about why aspec people 'count' as an oppressed identity, they tend to go for the big stuff like corrective rape and conversion therapy. And like, we should absolutely talk about that stuff. Obviously those things are terrible and important and we need to raise awareness and deal with them.
But I feel like people often gloss over how… quietly traumatising it is to grow up being told that there is only one way to be happy— and that everybody who doesn't conform to that norm is secretly miserable and just doesn't know it— and then to gradually realise that, for reasons that you cannot help, that is never going to happen for you.
You're not going to find a prince/princess and ride off into the sunset. Or if you do, then it's not going to look exactly the way it does in fairytales. You're not going to get a 'normal' relationship, because you are not 'normal', and everybody and everything around you keeps telling you that that's bad.
You see films where characters are presented as being financially stable, genuinely passionate about their work and surrounded by friends and family, but then spend the rest of the plot realising that the real thing they needed was a (romantic and sexual) partner, to make them 'complete'.
You absorb the idea that any relationships you have with allo people will ultimately be unfulfilling on their side, and that this will be your fault (even if you discussed things with your partner beforehand and they decided that they were a-okay with having those sorts of boundaries in a relationship) unless you deliberately force yourself into situations that you aren't comfortable with, so as to make uo for your 'defects'.
You grow up feeling lowkey gaslighted because all the adults in your life (even in LGBT+ spaces. In fact especially in LGBT+ spaces) are insisting that it's totally normal to not be attracted to anybody at your age, and then you go to school and everybody keeps pressuring you to name somebody you're attracted to because they can't imagine not being attracted to anybody at your age.
And then you get older and realise that one day you're going to be expected to leave home, and that one day all your friends are going to be expected to put aside other relationships and 'settle down' with a primary partner and you don't know what you're going to do after that because you straight up don't have a roadmap for what a 'happy ending' looks like for someone like you.
(And the LGBT+ community is little help, because so many people in there are more than happy to tell you that you're not oppressed at all. That you're like this because you don't want to have sex, and/or you don't want to have any relationships, that your orientation is some sort of choice you made— like not eating bananas— rather than an intrinsic part of you that a lot of us have at some point tried to wish away.)
Even if you're grey or demi, and do experience those feelings, you still have to deal with the fact that you're not experiencing them the 'normal' way and that that's going to effect your relationships and your ability to find one in the first place.
If you're aiming for lifelong singlehood (which is valid af) or looking for a qpp, then you're going to have to spend the rest of your life either letting people make wrong assumptions about your situation (at best that your relationship is of a different nature than it actually is, at worst that the life you've chosen is really just a consolation prize because you 'failed' at finding a romantic/sexual partner) or pulling out a powerpoint and several webpages every time you want to explain it.
This what being aspec looks like for most people, and it is constantly minimised as being unimportant and not worth fighting against— even in aspec spaces— because we've all on some level absorbed the idea that oppression is only worth fighting against if it's big, and dramatic, and immediately obvious. That all the little incidents of suffering that we experience on a daily basis are not enough to be worth bothering about.
I mean, who gives a shit if you feel broken, inherently toxic as a partner, and like you're going to be denied happiness because of your orientation? Shouldn't we all just shut up and thank our lucky stars we don't have to deal with all the stuff some of the other letters in the acronym have to put up with (leaving aside the fact that there are many aspec people who identify with more than one letter)?
So you know what? If you're aspec and you relate to anything I've said above (or can think of other things relating your your aspec-ness that I haven't mentioned) then this is me telling you now that it's enough. Even if we got rid of all the big stuff (which we're unlikely to do any time soon because— Shock! Horror!— the big stuff is actually connected to all the small stuff) we would still be unable to consider our fight 'over' because what you are experiencing is not 'basically okay' and something we should just be expected to 'put up with'.
No matter what anybody tells you, we have the right to demand more from life than this.
OP, I hope it's okay to expand on this, but I just wanna add how it's nearly impossible to be self sustaining while being single.
The fact that you get tax benefits for being married and having children as well as the dual-income household is something aspecs are barred from on an inherent basis because of our identities. Not to mention intersections like other queer identities, neurodivergency, disability, mental illness, chronic illness, and a host of other things I can't think of right now.
Your breakdown of the social impact of what we face and how deeply we've internalized all that was spot on, and everyone who still doesn't understand what aspecs experience needs to read it. I feel that it's also important to talk about how this system either guarantees we'll be working poor or that we force ourselves into unhappy normative relationships to avoid it.
And like. I wish aphobes would shut the fuck up about how our suffering and discrimination starts and ends with "someone was mean to me online uwu" because I'm tired of people suggesting aspecs need to have their identities raped out of them, and then turn right around and call us toxic perverts.
► “I’m not dating anyone because I want to focus on school and I’m too busy.” -said all through high school and college.
► “I don’t care how someone looks, I care about their personality.” - A common response to: ‘what’s your type??”
► Yeah, literally not having a ‘type’. Never understanding how people have ‘types’.
► “I’ll never have kids I am going to have dogs.”
► Never understanding fuck, marry, kill. Especially other peoples choices in the game.
► Getting really good at saying “Thank you for asking, but I’m just not interested in dating anyone right now.”
► Avoiding sexual conversations at all costs because they are uncomfortable, confusing or truly boring.
► Being a total hopeless romantic and wondering why people are more interested in how hot someone is versus them being kind?? or smart?? or funny?? what their hobbies are?? how they treat their mom??
► Being confused when people will go out of their way, even dangerously so, to please/impress someone they think is hot. Like why? You can see the heartbreak coming a million miles away because what even is sexual attraction.
► The explanation at all family dinners for not having a significant other is that you have more important things to be worrying about right now, LIKE SCHOOL.
► Being completely oblivious to others flirting at you and also not realizing when you might be coming off as flirty because you’re just a nice person and like to hold doors open for people.
► Anytime you find a good new song and then actually listen to the lyrics and sit there like??? What does this mean?
► Wondering why thinking about holding someones hand gives you butterflies in your stomach but if you even try to imagine having sex with them your mind goes blank.
Hey, if you’re ace, that’s chill. It doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you or that you need to change. Some people just aren’t into people sexually and that’s fine. Be confident in yourself.
I feel like demi and grayasexuals are like double agents between the allo and ace worlds. Like you guys know what it’s like to regularly feel 0 sexual attraction but then you also know what it’s like to be sexually attracted to people albeit rarely.
So you guys are like the most qualified to answer those classic questions (what the actual heck does sexual attraction feel like and how do you know when you’re feeling it) cuz you know what it’s like to Not feel it ya know?
*Princess Leia voice* Help us demi and gray ace ppl - you’re our only hope..
MY TIME HAS COME!!!!
Okay! SO~! As a Graysexual, I’m going to impart some advice I wish I had as a tiny, little Aceling on determining the type of attraction you are experiencing.
WITHOUT FURTHER ADIEU~~~~
[ID: The pigeon meme. A man, labelled “My family”, looks at a butterfly, labelled “A boy I mentioned once”, asking “Is this her future boyfriend?”. End ID]
Heteronormativity sucks. I just want to talk freely about my male friends just like I do about my female ones.
The idea an alt right mob could have murdered Mike Pence is fucking me up
I think we have to accept the fact that the President tried to have his Vice President murdered
every day i am percieved™️
There is a reason for this though!
The original tweet summarizes it pretty well. Fanfic tends to be popular among certain types of neurodivergent people (aka people most likely to read excessively as a child, and have burnout as an adult) for the same reasons that we tend to hyperfixate–neurochemical signaling (I hope I’m using that phrase correctly). What I mean is, for people who are really dependent on changes in dopamine/serotonin/neurotransmitter levels, who have low levels or wonky neural reward systems (perhaps the most common types of neurodivergence)…people like us rely on dependable external sources of those neurochemicals. In order to function, we spend a lot of our free time trying to level out our brain chemistry using things that can reliably bring us a steady stream of joyful moments (rewards) without costing too much of the mental effort that is already in short supply.
significantly: the investment of reading has to be balanced with a steady “return on investment”–and this return has to start fairly quickly. because again, we don’t have a lot of attention/energy to invest on tiring things. we have perpetual “low batteries” in that regard.
that doesn’t mean these stories are “simple,” or that they lack complexity or value–only that the reward has to come in short regular intervals, and it has to have a low “upfront cost.” which is why fanfic stories are so perfectly formulated for neurodivergent readers–they are often beautifully written, but skip a lot of the upfront costs (of introducing new characters, of world-building, of getting the audience emotionally connected to the story elements).
the nature of fanfiction is that the reader has a pre-existing relationship with this world and these characters. that–combined with the shorter average length of fics–means that fan fics very quickly start “rewarding” the reader in a way that traditional fiction struggles to. that’s not a bad thing! and maybe it’s something more traditionally published writers should be paying attention to.
Fanfic, as a genre, has been uniquely helpful and accessible to many neurodivergent readers who would otherwise struggle to immerse themselves in stories. I’m glad so many of you have found a way to love and enjoy reading again! The important thing is that you are spending time inside stories you love–the way those stories are published or presented to the world is just one detail.
Masterpost of identified insurrectionists who participated in the violent attempted overthrow/coup of the US government on 7 January 2021.
Richard “Bigo” Barnett of Gravette, Arkansas, who broke into the Capitol and stole mail from Speaker Pelosi’s desk.
Jon Schaffer from heavy metal band Iced Earth under record label Century Media Records.
Known Nazi Matthew Heimbach.
Nicholas Rodean of Frederick, Maryland.
Photos and IDs courtesy of @HomeGrownTerrorists on Instagram.
Emily Lewis of Dayton, Ohio, now fired from her job at Taylor Communications.
Adam Johnson of Palmetto, Florida, seen here stealing a podium during the violent invasion of the Capitol Building. His wife is Dr. Suzanne Johnson at Davita Medical in Palmetto, Florida.
Pro wrestler James DeFalco aka “Jimmy Jact Cash”. Seen in the news previously for defrauding members of his now-bankrupt gyms of hundreds of thousands of dollars.
Derrick Evans recently elected to West Virginia’s House of Delegates. It takes a special kind of domestic terrorist to try to overthrow the federal government while holding an elected position.
Jenna Ryan a realtor in Frisco, Texas. Are you allowed to hold a realtor’s license when you’ve committed a federal crime? I definitely wouldn’t want her having keys to my house.
Elizabeth Koch from Maryville, Tennessee. Props for outing yourself for federal crimes on national television. Double props for rubbing your eyes with an onion on camera and claiming you got maced.
Paul Davis former Associate General Counsel and Director of HR for Goosehead Insurance Company who fired him for domestic terrorism - and probably also gross incompetence. What kind of lawyer does a media interview while committing a federal crime? I’m guessing the State Bar of Texas is going to disbar him as well but we’re still waiting on that news.
Kristopher Drew licensed cosmetologist at Hair by Kristopher Drew. I’m not sure whether you’re allowed to be a cosmetologist and have a criminal record at the same time but I guess we’re about to find out.
Aaron Mostofsky son of Kings County Supreme Court Judge Steven (Shlomo) Mostofsky. Per the Jewish Telegraphic Agency, “Mostofsky’s brother Nachman, the executive director of Chovevei Zion, a politically conservative Orthodox advocacy organization, as well as a Brooklyn district leader and vice president of the South Brooklyn Conservative Club, also attended the rally Wednesday but did not enter the Capitol.”
Josiah Colt domestic terrorist and owner of FunnelCraft Co. in Boise, Idaho.
On the left is Nick DeCarlo from Murder the Media and on the right is Nick Ochs, Nazi and member of the Proud Boys. This pair of domestic terrorists posed for a photo inside the Capitol Building during their violent insurrection against the US Government.
Zach Crandall who outed himself for federal crimes.
Eduardo “Nick” Alvear seen here smoking pot inside the Capitol Building because why commit just one federal crime when you can commit two at once and document them both on film at the same time amiright.
Ben Thomas Crocker of Massachusetts. Apparently sedition and participating in a violent coup attempt makes you a “Maverick” these days.
Jenny Cudd founder of Becky's Flowers in Midland, Texas. Yes this domestic terrorist and white supremacist called herself out as a Becky. Even if you're fine doing business with seditionists (I'm not) I wouldn't recommend booking her for your next special event unless it's five to ten years out.
Dean Gomez, sales manager at Kevin Harris Allstate Agency, who was part of the attempted coup and tried really hard to break in to a federal building but didn't quite manage it. Is your presence at a violent insurrection and intention to overthrow the federal government enough to land you in prison? I guess we'll find out.
Jason Alexander (yes that Jason Alexander), domestic terrorist. #FreeBritney but Jason Alexander belongs in prison for federal crimes.
Matt Blesdoe, owner of Primetime Movers in Memphis, Tennessee, father, husband, Christian, wife beater and at the vanguard of the group that invaded the Capitol Building in an attempt to overthrow the federal government.
John Strand, model, represented by Wilhelmina Models. He's worked on many campaigns including Mr. Turk, Baskit Wear, AT&T, Zegna, will.i.am, Lisa Vanderpump, Uniqlo, Nicki Minaj and Samsung. And now he's a domestic terrorist who participated in the attempted overthrow of the US government.
Donald Rouse Sr. co-owner of the Louisiana chain of grocery stores Rouse's Markets and former Rouse HR Director-turned-domestic-terrorist Steve Galtier participating in the violent assault on the U.S. Capitol on January 6, 2021.
Is anyone else besides me concerned about how many business owners and HR Directors are popping up on this list of white supremacist terrorists? Imagine being a minority working one of those jobs.
Pastor Joey Deese of Oakdale Baptist Church in Rock Hill, South Carolina, dressed to the nines and ready to violently overthrow the US government.
I’m also concerned (but unfortunately not even slightly surprised) how many “good Christians” seem to think white supremacy, violence and toppling democracy are “what Jesus would have wanted”. This guy hasn’t been reported for domestic abuse like the previous “good Christian” on our list but he is preaching white supremacy and hatred from the pulpit and I’m not sure that’s an improvement.
Alex Smith of San Diego. All I have on this domestic terrorist - besides photos of him looking ever-so-pleased with himself while committing criminal trespass inside the US Capitol Building as part of an attempt to overthrow the US government - is that he graduated from Coronado High School in 2005.
If anyone knows where he works I’d be happy to add that to the post. Considering how generic his name is, I feel like a little more info on this federal criminal would make him pop up more easily in a Google search.
Jake Angeli or Jacob Chansley, QAnon cultist from Phoenix, Arizona, seen here committing criminal trespass inside the US Capitol Building during an attempted coup.
“12 News spoke with him over the phone Thursday morning when he stated he was the horned protester at the Capitol. He said he didn't have time to answer questions, but noted he was waiting for a ride to travel back to Phoenix. He also said he wasn't worried that he was listed as a person of interest by D.C. police.” Why is he not in prison? Good question.
Brian Gibson, lead pastor at HIS Church in Owensboro, Kentucky, and firm believer in white supremacy participated in the attempted coup at the US Capitol this week.
Jacob Riley owner of Riley Farms in Yucalpa, California. After being boycotted in 2018 for his racist and homophobic Tweets, he sued the local school district for $10 million for refusing to send their kids to his farm on field trips, claiming they violated his 1st and 14th amendment rights to be a bigot. (Spoiler alert: he lost.) This week he joined a violent attempt to overthrow the government. How very in character.
Nazi and Proud Boy John Jay Abney is a carpenter from Portland, Oregon. He attempted to violently overthrow the US Goverment this week.
Former Pennsylvania State Rep. Rick Saccone will no longer be teaching at St. Vincent College in Latrobe, Pennsylvania, after he travelled to Washington, D.C. this week and joined the large group of Nazis and white supremacists who attempted to violently overthrow of the US Goverment.
