get the feeling, don't fight it

MATT BERRY as Laszlo Cravensworth in WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS (2019- ) Episode 5.01 The Mall

flat fuck friday

you know what day it is

one thing to miss about porn on tumblr is how ridiculous people acted like. there was this one catfish on here who would steal other people’s dick pics and pretend they were all him. he’d post circumcised one day and uncut the next like… sir.

not a morning person not a night owl but a secret third thing

i open and close tumblr like it's a fridge

Updated Emergency Cleaning List!

As thanks for the warm (and, at times, hilarious) welcome back, here's an updated, significantly less wordy version of my Emergency Cleaning list. The original will be a decade old in a few months, if you can believe it!

You may need to modify or adjust the steps on this list based on your own situation — it's meant as a general guideline for those who need a little help pushing past the "Where the hell am I supposed to start?" feeling. This is also not meant to be a comprehensive "How to clean your house properly and maintain it forever" guide. It's for those moments when you have to quickly half-ass it because someone is going to be in your space soon and it's a disaster. If you can close some doors and cut some steps from the list, even better. Definitely do that.

(This is one of many checklists and downloadables available on my Patreon, if you're into that sort of thing.)

me: it is what it is

my brain: lmao you're sooo gonna cry about it tonight

all homeless people deserve housing

yes even the ones that don’t work and are mentally ill and take lots of drugs

Time Lapse of Plants - Three Days

Tfw you realize that much of Earth’s life moves and communicates on a time scale humans cannot hope to comprehend.

Plants exhibit a lot of behavior we typically associate only with animals, but don’t notice because of the difference in timescales and just how utterly alien plants are compared to ourselves. They communicate, the cooperate, they engage in parental care, and discoveries in the relatively new study of plant cognition seem to indicate that they have some capacity for decision making and learning. Just as we learned that animals are not, in fact, mindless, unfeeling automata we are now learning the same is true of plants.

I wish we could see them waving around and moving though in real time :(