I’m chronically offline but Tumblr doesn’t count = I’m California sober.

I know this is about capitalism but it's also about my knees

i was looking through my wip art folder and wow i cant believe i never posted these

random old wes doodles!!!

there was supposed to be more but i didn't finish them

everytime someone rbs this i get a notification as though it were my post, even the rbs that don’t have my addition. go away onion post i am not your mother

Abandoned by its biological mother, the onion post instead imprints on a random passerby that fed it.

was lamenting the fact that my eczema is flaring up when the thought "the itcher" popped into my head fully formed and unprompted and now i can't stop laughing

obsessed with people leaving reviews on my work that make it obvious that they are from Somewhere Else. like especially comments in different languages, but even comments in english that use words/phrases that aren’t typically found my community’s lexicon are so so special to me. like yes. YES. you have crossed oceans and time to find me. i am cradling you in my arms

Imagine if you had a neighbour who keeps performing songs from Phantom of the Opera in his apartment every night, by himself but accompanied by a parrot, which he has taught to sing Christine's part. Admittedly it's kind of obnoxious but you are far too baffled to even be properly annoyed. And also you don't want to confront someone with that kind of power and determination. So every once in a while you just hear this guy dramatically bellow

[ASTONISHINGLY HIGH-PITCHED PARROT SHRIEK]

I'm so sorry I had to it was haunting me

Oh, you think you're safe now?

Nothing can deliver you from these paws!

i've grown to like elfs a lot more than i used to, in recent days

anti-egg vegans are always a hoot. like, she’s not using it. it’s not fertilized. it’s going to rot and attract predators. you want me to just throw it in the trash??

its still animal exploitation, is it not?

do you think a chicken with zero emotional attachment to the egg she popped out feels exploited when that egg leaves the coop?

if that unfertilized egg cracked in the pen there’s not a chicken who would wait 0.002 seconds to slurp that shit down raw and unseasoned but I’m supposed to exploit foreign children farming for slave wages and ship all of their staple crops across the world to me instead. and this feels like the moral high ground to them. alright

i feel largely similar about plastic ""vegan leather"" -- in recent years, each year, millions of pounds of cow hides have been thrown out as offal because there's less demand for real leather. none of the "cruelty-free" shit saved those cows. it just created more waste out of them.

honestly this is how i feel about plastic versions of things we used to make out of bone, like needles, childrens cutlery, etc etc etc. i think if we're going to have cattle (and theres no ethical path to Not having Some cattle anymore) then we should use the entriety of the beast or its disrepsectful, also using the whole animal means that theres no corners to be cut, if the skin is scratched you loose money, if the bones are weak you loose money, its just a good way to ensure the systemic health of the cows.

clair de lune will always go down smooth, claude really did put his whole debussy into this one

*examines your pdf folder* have you read them all?

Is a wine cellar meant for storing only empty bottles?

REVERSE TROPE WRITING PROMPTS

You order a package off Amazon. When the Amazon delivery guy shows up to your door, instead of giving you the package you bought, he beats the shit out of you. Then, when he sees that you are not dead yet, he calls all of the Amazon delivery people in the area and they all proceed to beat the shit out of you. Miraculously, you survive. Another miracle: a friend in your neighborhood caught the assault on video. After a month of recovery and extensive hospital bills that you have no idea what to do with, the video has gone viral. You read the comments below. “This is what happens to people who fuck with Amazon!!!” Someone says. “I’ve never been beaten up by Amazon employees, and I’ve been using them all my life!” Someone else comments. Later, you start to see articles popping up about your story. They all mention that when you were 17, your license was revoked for reckless driving. In a Facebook post on your mom’s feed, someone is going on a rant about how not all Amazon delivery guys are bad, and that if you look really close, the “bad” ones are just stressed out. Your name is trending on Twitter. Jeff Bezos films a response to your attack, denouncing the video of you getting beaten to within an inch of your life by his employees as becoming “a symbol of hate towards Amazon.” The people who attacked you still deliver packages around your neighborhood. You saw one of them just yesterday as you were watering your plants. You still can’t pay your hospital bills. Your phone dings- Twitter again. “Maybe if you didn’t order from Amazon,” someone pipes up, “this wouldn’t have happened!”

Holy shit

Someone did not get the analogy

A neat thing about The Goblin Emperor is that while it's a classic trope of the lost heir plunged into a morass of courtly intrigue where he has no idea whom he can trust, the very first thing it does is emphasize how much he has to choose to trust anyway. Maia has to trust the head of his household to appoint his body servants, and he has to trust those servants. He has to trust the adremaza to appoint his nohecharei, and he has to trust his nohecharei. Any one of these people could kill him. Any one of them could carry gossip to his enemies, or make him look bad in public and thus weaken him in the eyes of the court. But if he so much as implies a discomfort with these choices, he'll offend powerful people without cause – and anyway, how could he possibly pick better? He has no idea what he's doing. He's forced to rely on people. He's forced to trust. The only person he actually personally chooses is Csevet, and what he chooses to do is essentially hand Csevet the keys to the empire. He got so fucking lucky there, that could have gone so incredibly badly.

But it didn't. Because, as the book emphasizes, trust is the right choice. Even when it does go badly, even when he is betrayed, that doesn't mean the trust was wrong. Because when one person betrays him, every single other person around him shows how truly loyal they are, not only by rushing to his aid, but by caring so deeply and obviously about him.

That's why this book feels so odd for its genre: there's a bunch of complex courtly intrigue going on, but Maia never plays the game. He never schemes, he's never playing 5D chess with his enemies. He has to navigate the factions of the court and try to win them to his side, but he does so by being kind and forthright. He's completely blindsided by the coup attempts, and frankly so are we, because he's just been focusing on other stuff! And he survives them, not through his own cunning, but through the love of those he placed his trust in.

self-proclaimed body language "experts" are so frustratingly hilarious because they seem incapable of understanding that people can lie to you