Just two girls with their pink top hats

They are going on a date to the opera

Hisashi Saito, 1980

Item: Positronic Laser Oscillo-Tron (or “P.L.O.T. Device” for short) of unknown but surely powerful purpose, disguised by its makers as an ear of corn to hide it from their enemies

I’m high as shit and I’m just carrying around this lantern like a fucking guardsman

tags from @cromerholt

historians will call them intense 3d chess friends

they put pussy in the water supply to keep the lesbians healthy

ⓘ Fact Check

There are currently no jurisdictions worldwide that mandate the addition of pussy to drinking water, nor have any clinical trials shown that the addition of pussy to drinking water has any significant effect on the heath of lesbians.

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idk why but they buried the option to turn this feature off - but you can find it if you go to the FAQ.

WHY DID THEY NEED TO CLAIRIFY THAT

Tumblr has fact checking?

apparently???

yeah it’s new :/ they announced it on the staff blog here

The absolute height of the unintentional comedy of life that I have seen was in the finnish glass museum. Interior design is one of those things that's kind of a big deal here, one of those things that people who grew up somewhere are surprised to hear that their country is not all that known for. My friends share it in the group chat every time an american movie or show they're watching has a vase, water glass or candleholder in the background that they immediately spotted was by a finnish designer. I took up a whole paragraph to make it clear that this is A Whole Thing here.

Anyway, in the glass museum, one of the displays was a feast table set with the absolute classics, hits and highlights of finnish glassware designs - the absolutely fanciest plates and serving dishes, wine glasses and water glasses, carafes and pitchers. I could pretty confidently say that the entire presentation, if sold item-for-item, cost more than my first car. Perhaps twice as much, easy. An unfathomably expensive, fancy, finest table set of finnish design that you and I are too poor to ever get our hands on.

And on one of the plates was a dead fly.

And I had never seen anything funnier in my life. All these fine dishes and plates all empty, and on just one plate at the end of the table was a dead fly chilling on its back like that was the whole feast. The main course. One single dead fly. A human could not have thought of anything more absurdly funny than the specific location that one random fly had died out of pure happenstance. I fought myself so hard to keep my volume to museum-acceptable levels that instead of laughing out loud I went straight into hysterical gasping with tears in my eyes. I could not perfectly recreate the image from memory, but I can't let you go before I try to sketch it nonetheless:

BEAT THEM THE WAY THE ROMANS BEAT CHRIST

Mowing through an entire box of pocky feeling like a pencil sharpener being fed whole pencils by a 3rd grader

finally painted this mushroom vessel I got for free from my step-dads co-workers' grandmother's estate sale a couple of summers ago

Silencio

it’s really important that you are a little bit in love with your friends btw. it’s crucial even

a lot of people seem confused by this post so i’ll clarify: this does not have to mean you’re romantically involved w your friends. you can love them very intensely but platonically. you can let the lines blur if you want. what matters is that you adore the ppl you choose to surround yourself with. the details of that aren’t so important as long as you and your friends are on the same page about it. hope this helps

(Kicking legs into the air) I'm sooo masc... Hehe... Ooh my gooood I'm Sooo masc!!!!