Jordyn

Everyone just.... In the coming weeks please notice and take care of your mental health. Watch other people too. We as humans were not meant to be completely isolated. Many of us neurodivergent ppl don't take well to sudden shifts in schedules like this (regimented to self-administered is an incredibly hard and drastic move). Even if you're deeply antisocial. Depression and other mental illnesses love inertia - they take "I have stopped" and triple the force of the stopping. You might notice it's harder to get out of bed, harder to shower, harder to do anything - nobody is around to hold you accountable. Just ... Watch for it.

Yes, the social distancing is imperative for the general health and safety of others. I encourage safe behaviors. But just be .... A little bit kinder than you think you need to be, to yourself and to others.

2020 MOODBOARD

“I’m not going to try and make excuses,” she said, doing her best to keep her voice level. “I know what you must think. But he’s not the person you think he is. He felt like he had to do as he was told to protect his family. I… I know him.” Ginny’s eyes suddenly grew large and round. “Wait, wait…” Hermione did, her heart sinking, ready to be thrown under the bus. “… did you two have sex?” Whatever she had been steeling herself for, that particular question was not it. At once she felt her cheeks flooding with heat. She scrambled to speak, failed, closed her mouth tightly. Ginny’s face dropped. “Oh my god… is he good?” “Ginny!”

here is a picture: one of the first people to bully me, making a facebook post about how she’s staunchly anti-bully.

what could i say? you ruined my fucking life, you know that, right? i almost - thank god only almost - took myself off this globe. i almost threw away my one precious life. fuck you. you don’t deserve 56 likes and 64 heart replies. 

what could i say? it’s almost the end of a decade. and i’m doing better than ever. and i’m okay. despite what you did, i’m okay. i’m happy and i’m doing what i love. i still have trouble making friends because of you, but at least i make some of them, in the end. 

what could i say except - god, i hope this true. i hope you grew up like i did and you got better like i did and now you’re teaching people not to make the mistakes you did. i hope you raise your kids right. i hope you say - i did the wrong thing. it was easy, and it made me feel powerful when i was powerless, but it was the wrong thing to do. i hope you say to yourself - one day i’ll apologize. it’s okay if you don’t, i don’t really need you to. 

god, i hope you didn’t tuck what you did into a back pocket as “youthful indiscretion.” i hope you aren’t bringing that same cruelty to your workplace, teaching other people it’s okay to be that way. i hope you don’t hang out with the mean ones, i hope you don’t laugh at the ones who are falling, i hope you know exactly how close you came to being the end of a life.

here is a picture: i realize in this moment that she probably don’t remember anything about me. that i was just someone who was weird and ugly and it’s not bullying to point out the undiagnosed symptoms of adhd. it’s not bullying because i deserved it for being different - it was character building by process of slow decay.

in another life, i get on ellen. or dr. phil. or somebody. and they bring her out and they say: here is the hand you spat into, how does it feel to see her, knowing that what you left in her still sometimes ruptures. i don’t know what she would say. maybe i’m sorry. maybe i’m glad you’re okay. maybe who the fuck are you anyway? who knows.

i write in the comments a whole speech that i delete. it isn’t good victimhood to refuse to move on. it isn’t good victimhood to be angry still. it isn’t good. i got therapy, i got my life together. 

good luck out there. i don’t know what you’re doing. but i hope you’re someone better. 

Happy Belated birthday to Draco Malfoy, his birthdays throughout his life

Ages 1,3,5,7,11,13,15,17,19

but you see her on instagram and it was never really said that you guys aren’t friends but one day she stopped answering and you stopped texting and it’s not like the wound is a cavern but it is a diagram of what if in red letters. you want to tell her nice lipstick that’s a good color but the last time you spoke it was stilted and awkward 

how do you say goodbye, you know? it’s not an unfriend and block kind of situation. but you watch the people you once loved go on and have a life and you’re outside of it. and it’s bittersweet because of course it’s okay that you’re both thriving. but she used to be who you’d call if you needed to cry. she used to be who’d you’d be binge watching the new series with. you used to be hers, in a way, even if that way wasn’t permanent. and now she’s someone else and so are you and your friendship is clicking heart shapes next to pictures where she smiles next to people you’ve never met. you know where her birthmark is. she knows where you’ve buried your dead.

the poets and the singers and the authors write about romantic love when it ends. but nobody tells you how to get over a friend.

hello taylor if you’re reading this i love you and i love getting surprises like festival dates out of nowhere!! however in this instance i think it would really be beneficial to let us know if you are or are not planning to also do a ‘typical’ tour like you’ve done in the past. i’m such a mom friend so i just don’t wanna see anyone strain themselves financially to travel thousands of miles to see you if you’ll end up coming to a city an hour away from them in a few months anyways. thank you for your time xo

flowers for those who need them:

🌸 you matter. even if you don’t think you’ve done anything of value, you have. you have value and worth. you always will. not when you get your shit together, not two years ago - always.

🌹 please take care of yourself. take your meds, drink some water, eat something. i know this is all over tumblr, but your body needs those things to function. eating and drinking and your meds will improve your mood and help you stay afloat.

🌼 be proud of yourself. you’ve made it so far! you’ve survived every bad day you’ve evr had. you’re so strong. you can do this. keep going. you’re a force to be reckoned with.

🌻 you’re beautiful. yes, you. don’t say “oh, this doesn’t apply to me.” because it does! you’re beautiful and don’t let anybody tell you otherwise.

🌷your friends do care about you. mental illnesses are just mean. they love you, even if your brain tells you different.

🌺 stay alive, please. ♡

hi taylor, i’m desi and today was the best day of my life, thank you so so much baby ✨

to YOUR album, YOUR rights, YOUR success 🥂 @taylorswift 💘

Afterglow lyrics

i dont think afterglow is getting enough love, taylor might not perform it on tour im gonna be sad... afterglow stans please rise

GOOD MORNING PUMPKIN SPICE LATTES ARE BACK AND I WONT HEAR A SINGLE PERSON COMPLAINING ABOUT IT BECAUSE THEY MAKE ME HAPPY AND IF YOU DONT LIKE THEM YOU DONT HAVE TO BUY ONE THANK YOU HAPPY FALL

HAPPY FALL BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!

— fading friendships

taylor pointing out and recognising that you don't need to forgive and forget to move on is very important because holding people accountable for their own toxic behaviour towards you can be kinda difficult to do but it's very important to know and be reminded that you don't need to let people that hurt you off the hook just to benefit them and their feelings if they sure as hell aren't thinking of yours

Welcome to the Maya secret session! I’ll be reading my Twitter drafts to a select few!

OBSESSED WITH LOVER SO FAR!! @taylorswift ur a lyrical genius im so in love with this album

@taylorswift SO proud of you Tay for this album. so many of these songs speak to me in ways you never have before, by far your best lyrical masterpiece yet. thank you for giving me another soundtrack for my life, love you