A true story

omfg

hdhshs

the most realistic depiction of swimsuit shopping

Via @Jammho (Twitter)

How the fuck was this a children’s television character?!?

this always cheers me up.

I don’t know who played Mr Blobby here.

But that guy deserved a Best Actor in a Comedy Emmy Award here.   

He is hysterical. 

Jack still being so suspicious.

what is this.

an anxiety attack

He gone

Bonus:

Jack: no fear

Mr Blobby: J̡̼̓̓ͮ͑ͩͭ̇͞A̧̬̙̹̝̻̼ͯ̑͆̉̿C̯̬̯̬̤̻̦̞̎̐̈̏́͗̀̐͘Kͭ҉̹̼̭̹̻͢

Jack: one fear

The female goblins (or possibly imps) from Sanrio’s “Journey Through Fairyland”

wнαт тнe ғυcĸ ιѕ тнιѕ?

Elmo’s voice saying “I’ll fuck u up” is the best and worst thing ever

YO I SWEAR THIS SHIT IS TOO FUNNY😭🤣

I WATCH THIS EVERYDAY

*sips tea* Let this spread all over Tumblr.

Please Reblog…

Reblog it–

“My mom painted this and said no one would like it. It’s her 2nd painting.”

“I painted somebody’s mom”

“Took a while and not perfect, but i painted the guy who painted the other guy’s mom”

“I painted the girl who painted the guy who painted the other guy’s mom who painted an egret”

This is so pure

so the thing about my family is that we have two ancestors on my dad’s side who were buried in france, where I currently live. one died in the spanish civil war, and one died prior doing…we don’t know what. but he somehow managed to get buried in père lachaise. 

so anyhow, my gran sends me a message like “pls put flowers on ur uncle samuel’s grave because he’s gone over a century with none and it will make the ghost mad if he hasn’t already” because my family spends time in europe but never long enough to go all the way to père lachaise and give ya boy samuel jr. his death rites. so im like “ok gran I can do that” bc im a good grandson and you do not fuck with gran she doesn’t DESERVE THAT 

i figure out which plot he’s on and ask someone specifically where you can find uncle samuel jr. and they tell me where and so I arrive at the junction and. 

HE GONE. 

WHERE DID YOU GO UNCLE SAMUEL. 

*celine dion’s smash hit “my heart will go on” playing in the distance* 

in other words either someone stole my entire great great uncle samuel or he has risen again, ready to party in paris for all of eternity. 

You’re pretty chill about a corpse disappearing.

My guy, my dude, he’s been dead since 1851. He could be anywhere. He does what he wants.

aeiou

Hospital notes

2.5D anime

Yo..

Imagine setting up this whole thing

ok why does this look better than marvel movies with $100m budgets

REBLOG

Re-reblog with some extra notes because a lot of people are just like ‘we’re all fucked/we’re gonna die’. Listen, not all food is equally as contaminable. Some small notes are stay away from delicate greens because they grow on thre ground where the poop is but cannot stand up to rigorous washing OR cooking, which is why stuff like romaine lettuce and baby spinach is a problem.

All other veggies can and should be thoroughly washed, and if you eat a lot of raw veg and want to be safe- cook it. People have shit on cooking food lately with all the raw vegan hype but guess why we humans started to do it? Two main reasons, one is increased nutrient absorption, the other is you don’t get the shits and die as often from cooked food. Also, meat is not your friend right now. If you are used to eating meat, I would avoid it and switch to eggs, which are sealed and even if the outsides came from a chicken’s ass, the inside is safe. Fish also tends to be cleaner and is always less at risk of pathogens than farm meat but again, be careful. This is survivable, if it wasn’t there’d be no point to warning you. Y'all will not survive what’s coming if you see every bit of news as proof of your doom. Forewarned is forearmed. Be safe, be sharp, be helpful.

the only person to do this move EVER… truly deserving of the mitski treatment

Her smile!!!

:/

This somehow gets even funnier when you remember that Pit can’t fucking read