+500 health

Would you buy from this bakery?? …Are they qualified?

…I have a new New Year’s Resolution for 2019.

possibly my favourite scene from anything ever

ok what the hell is the x files

Aafafdgdgfhfn

FUCK YOU THIS ISNT A GODDAMN TITLE, THESE ARE JUST RANDOM WORDS THAT DON’T MEAN ANYTHING WHEN PUT TOGETHER AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Pagan holiday’s are fun cus no one can figure out if they should preface their holiday greatings with “happy” “merry” or “blessed”

@greed-the-dorkalicious you’re right and you should say it

So good

sir could you just calm down for a second

apparently porn bots are now hacking into in-use accounts (I’m assuming larger accounts) and posting while the blog owner is still active. 

holy fuck.

why are staff so incompetent

rather than fixing their obviously very flawed code and development, they’re deciding to ban tits? fucking tits?

that being said, although it’s so unlikely this will happen to me, please know that it’s not me posting these links and photos. Please dont click on the links. 

oh my god.

do you think seagulls feel regret

cause i just witnessed one swallow half a pancake in less than a second

via @salamancers

“how can you even like villains??? they—”

they’re Big Sexy. next question. 

*shows up 15 months late with starbucks* anyway here’s my vine compilation

Fuck, Millennials are fucking hilarious

I always feel better about youths after a good vine comp.

t-t-t-t-t-target!!!!!

“Do you speak any Japanese?”

“I’m Chinese I don’t speak any-”

“‘Cause if you do, I’ll sleep with you right now.”

“MITSUBISHI, TOYOTA”

“Bitch cone get me, not only is he ugly but his dishes talk!” “Who you talking to Belle?” “Uh… No one…. bitch that was his plate!”