The very idea of Sansa being an incorporation of white femininity being crowned at the end very much defeats the theme of story where women are castigated for refusing or changing the system yet the one who conforms to and is comfortable bowing to the very societal paradigm is rewarded . "If you can't win then just join them". Her leading is a bad model for people who look up to female characters that have been trodded down by society.

1) Gender conforming is not the same as internalized misogyny. If you want to have someone who outwardly conforms to gender ideals and tries to ‘win by joining them’ and is misogynistic at the same time, Cersei is right there.

2) Again, if you want someone who acts like a white feminist would, Dany is right there.

3) If you want a revenge fantasy, Arya is right there.

4) Are you honestly saying, that gender conforming women should not end up in a position of power? That practically reeks of internalized misogyny, if you’re a woman or dudebro’s opinion that only non-feminine women are valid if you’re a man. Just because a woman likes nice dresses, likes to sing, values courtesy she is not less valid than a woman with trousers.

5) You honestly don’t get it, don’t you? If you think feminine women are less valid or should not be respected, you are not a feminist. If you think a feminine woman is per definition a woman who enables partriarchy, I say shame on you. Shame on you for disrespecting your sisters.

The reality is far more complex than you think and gender conforming or non gender conforming can have advantages and disadvantages. I’ve been on both sides of the spectrum. I never was a ‘girly girl’ and I suffered from that because boys would not let me join them in playing football and girls would make fun of me for not really caring about my clothes. And yet, when it came to academics I had an advantage as the ngc type, because people would automatically assume I was brainy. And then I got married and got two children and somehow people thought I was gc because of that. I honestly got told to my face that I should give up all hope of an academic career because I had children - which obviously meant that I am a traditional women.

So. repeat it with me: NO WOMAN WINS IN PATRIARCHY.

And maybe also: REALITY IS COMPLEX, more so than you thought. Patriarchy can be questioned on many levels. And respecting women who enjoy traditional feminine ways for themselves is a way to get rid of toxic patriarchy’s thought patterns.

A gc woman as Queen in the North, as an independent Queen in the North does not enable patriarchy, and guess why is that? Because she is independent, she rules on her own, and if Sansa wants to embroider every dress she ever wears and dye her lashes and wear rouge and sing and play the harp and everything. GOOD FOR HER. That in itself does not enable patriarchy. Her very existence as Queen in her own right questions patriarchy.