“he comes home around 7 pm and i’ve made dinner that’s been sitting since 5 sorry, he says you know how work can be he asks me about my day and i tell him that everything is fine, just a boring old Wednesday i don’t tell him that i thought of drowning myself in the bathtub or that the only reason i got out of bed was to stop the kid from crying i don’t tell him that i don’t want to go back to work next week but he flashes those freshwater eyes at me and i try to feel like everything is where it’s supposed to be his phone flashes with a woman’s name a client, he tells me but we both know better i hear the kid start to cry again he leaves the table without excusing himself i try to imagine another universe where i’m a little happier but it slips through my fingers like sand and i am left convincing myself that this is what i wanted yes, this is what i wanted”