mutuals do this

I am just picturing like... putting it back in there. and it fits so snugly that you barely notice the seam. but then you wanna get it back out. so you go and get your plunger

My mood every payday

there are about 471 million tumblr blogs and the site sold for 3 million which means on average your blog is worth 0.6 cents

Me logging onto Tumblr in 2020

I once read a twilight fic where edward boiled himself like a lobster in the bath for hours so he’d be warm when he made out with bella

need me a freak like that

primmadona worm... yeah

all he ever wanted was to squirm

Best sticker

Freakin’ awesome. We live in anaheim so our boys got to enjoy the all-access Disneyland Daily pass. Our youngest (Tanner) wanted to be an officer. Unfortunately he was too small for the restraints on splash mountain so when the coaster sped up it flung him out and he skidded about 200 feet on the asphalt. Here’s what we’re keeping him in right now:

Disney won’t let us bury on park grounds because of a potential copyright issue with the superman thing.

We miss him a lot, but there’s a cancellation fee on the Daily pass, so we’ve been making the most of it. His brother still enjoys the park and since we chose not to press charges, we’re entitled to one free mickey pancake a day

??? Reading that looked like you tried to copy abd paste 3 differint stories together to make us not realise you just copied and pasted??

First of all: splash mountain is a water log ride. There are no places where it just…speeds…up? Its a fucking water log ride???

BECAUSE its a water log ride it DOESNT HAVE RESTRAINTS….it DOES however have a minimum height requirment of 46 inches to ride the ride, so EVEN IF this kid was too small, they WOULD NOT let them ride.

There is no asphault anywhere near the track itself. The CLOSEST you could come is the big drop at rhe end but again, minimum height requirement of 46 inches tall to ride, the angle of the drop and the speed at which you go it is physically impossible to get ‘launched’.

I feel like this is obvious but theres so much obviously wrong about the second addition i suppose i need to state this.

SUPERMAN. ISNT. DISNEY. Superman is DC. The only theme parks that have licenced DC character based rides is six flags.

Six flags, another park that HAS MINIMUM HEIGHT REQUIREMENTS for rides.

That has restraints on rides in which are necesary. Which again, YOU CANNOT RIDE IF YOU DO NOT MEET THE SAFETY GUILDLINES.

Go try to shitpost and ruin the reputation of a differint park, will you? At least make sure your story is even plausable before you open your mis-informed mouth.

@crabwalker​ Are you seriously explaining to me how Splash Mountain works? Do you think I don’t remember how my son died? Oh, and it’s “physically impossible to get launched?” Guess what, asshole? My SON got launched. This is the last photo we have of him.

You’ve said some cruel things to me, but I’m going to be the bigger person. I’ll be praying, for your sake, that nobody in your family ever gets launched.

Honestly if tumblr became a paid service I’d still pay full price just for content like this

I can’t breathe this is a comment on the AMAs performance of senorita

Brah

damn she thicc

these pancakes have been to dr. miami

damn im tryna slide thru

your girl gone to the store and she leaves you alone with these pancakes. what you gonna do?