hawthorne.

@matriixrch / matriixrch.tumblr.com

(  A U T O P L A Y  )
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█ ♡ ❝ posy

& @matriixrch !
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               ❛  haymitch said you didn’t like alex, that you’re just lying to me. and i know it sounds so stupid to even be asking, but he sounded so serious, and – i dunno, i just got scared. it’s not true, is it? you do like my boyfriend, right? you’d tell me if you didn’t?  ❜
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              she’s gonna punch haymitch, later. sitting up in bed, hazelle pats the spot next to her so her daughter can sit down. ❝ i’m not lying to you, sweetheart. i do like alex. i watched the both of you GROW UP -- i love  b o t h  of ya. ❞

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█ ♡ ❝ haymitch

              “Hey —- don’t you shove me.” And it’s childish, but as soon as she’s through the window, he’s reaching out to shove her right back. That’ll teach her. Or she’ll just turn around and shove him back twice as hard. Frankly, she’s TOUGHER than him and he knows it, but he’ll be damned if he ever says that out loud. “We’re goin’ to the meadow, stupid. ‘S nowhere else to go this late. Or maybe we should go into the woods and feed you to a damn wolf pack.”
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               ❝ WATCH ME. ❞ hazelle gives him another playful shove, before climbing out the window. when he shoves her back, blue eyes narrow in his direction before she punches him in the shoulder. no words, just a punch. but within in a second, a smile forms on her lips && she’s rolling her eyes. ❝ you’re being ANNOYING. keep it up && i’ll turn around && crawl back into my room. ❞ hazelle gives him a warning look, before bumping shoulders with him. ❝ now come on, let’s go!! OH, and if we do happen to stumble across a wolf pack, they’ll go for you first -- you're bigger so you’re the better meal. ❞

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█ ♡ ❝ haymitch

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          “Yeah, well… She’s asking about ancient history and the facts aren’t hers to know. Doesn’t matter who you loved first. She needs to think her dad is the hero. That you loved him more than anything. She’s got it in her head that you guys had some damn fairytale romance. It needs to stay that way. You need to straighten it out. Like you said — your fault. You can damn well fix it. And she doesn’t need to know about—- about anything recent.”
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             hazelle lets out a FRUSTRATED sigh, a hand running through her hair. ❝ but it wasn’t a fairytale ; nothing about any of our lives has been FAIRYTALE-ESQUE. i love posy’s OPTIMISM && outlook on the world, but someday, she’s going to find out things that aren’t so perfect. she’s already figured out i’m NOT perfect. i -- we can’t protect her from the facts of life forever. ❞ BRIGHT BLUE eyes stay fixed on him. ❝ look, if i could take back what i said i would. but she knows now && i’m not magic, so i can’t just FIX this. she doesn’t need to know details about anything... we can just give her some basics. please don’t fight me so goddamn hard on this. ❞

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█ ♡ ❝ HAYMITCH.

          “Don’t tell me to shut up! I got the kid askin’ me if I LOVE you. If we were together. How the hell am I supposed to explain the way things were back then? I told her you loved her dad. That the good guy won. You married the damn hero. Apparently that’s not good enough.”
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          ❝ i don’t know! ❞ she swallows thickly, biting on the inside of her lip. ❝ hey, that’s not really fair. of course i loved noah ; you both know that. but before him, there was you. i loved you first. ❞ eyes dart between the floor && his face. ❝ look, it was MY FAULT, okay? i’m sorry. && no matter how much you wish you could erase our past right now, it happened && you can’t erase anything so we have to deal with it. ❞

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█ ♡ ❝ HAYMITCH.

     “’Oh hey Posy, I had sex with Haymitch once’ —       Yeah, I can really see how that’d just slip out in a       fucking conversation. She hates me now. Thanks       a lot.”
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            ❝ SHUT UP, that’s not what i said!! ❞ eyebrows furrow together, as arms fold across her chest. ❝ i’m sorry -- it really was an accident, okay? i wouldn’t have said ANYTHING on purpose. ❞ she  h u f f s, eyes slowly meeting haymitch’s. ❝ there’s no way she hates you. i don’t think that girl even knows how to do that. ❞

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╳ ||HAYMITCH.

     He’s scowling as soon as she opts for teasing instead of a simple friendly greeting. His intentions are good – he doesn’t want them to be caught sneaking out, and he’s trying to scarper before his mother has a chance to catch him and drag him back inside – but it seems he’s doomed for everything he does to be mocked and ridiculed by his so-called best friend. He doesn’t like it.
     “Shut up. I’m tryin’a be subtle. You wanna come with me or not?”
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               hazelle laughs gently at the clear DISCONTENT written on his face, before resting her chin in her hands while her elbows rest against her window sill. there’s no way she was going to miss an opportunity for a late night adventure with her best friend, but it’s still fun to  t e a s e  him. ❝ the staring was very subtle -- CONGRATS. ❞ she can’t hide the smile, before grabs her only jacket off her bed && turns off her light. ❝ you didn’t think i was gonna say no, did you? now move please -- i can’t get out with you standing right there. ❞ she nudges him in the chest with her hand, before climbing out her window. ❝ where to, partner?

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╳ ||HAYMITCH.

     He’s already pulled his jacket back on, and he sighs as she blocks the door. If he had the energy, he could’ve been out of it before she had a chance to cross the room, but withdrawal and misery do a damn good job of draining a man of his fight. He doesn’t want to argue. He doesn’t want to play games. He just wants to leave so he can find somewhere to sleep; somewhere he doesn’t have to face a thousand missed and stolen chances. To contemplate the things he lost because of Snow and his regime would only bring an even stronger wave of rage and grief. He just wants to leave.
                     “Just move. I’m not in the mood for this.”
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        no matter what has  h a p p e n e d  over the years between the two of them, hazelle has NEVER once stopped CARING about haymitch. now is of course, no  e x c e p t i o n. the GUILT of having to keep asher && haymitch apart starts  g n a w i n g  at her stomach again while her back is pressed FIRMLY against the door with the  i n t e n t i o n  to keep haymitch inside. “i’m  s o r r y — i didn’t mean to…” STRAWBERRY BLONDE waves frame her face, her eyes PLEADING for him to  s t a y. “just stay, okay? i was getting kind of LONELY, anyways. we can just sit — or we can talk about  w h a t e v e r  you want. please -- ?please, don’t hate me

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