hey boss i can't come in today it's a sunny day and there's a lovely breeze coming in through my window, yeah it's rustling the branches of the tree outside that's finally bloomed so it's pretty serious

I hate the “open floor plan” that everyone is obsessed with in houses now. I want nooks and crannies and bizarre floor plans. I don’t need to be able to see what someone is doing on the other side of the house. I want places to hide and lurk and dwell in the shadows. I am the beast who awaits in the labyrinth

whenever i'm trying to talk myself out of buying something i don't need i always hear my old russian professor's voice echoing in my head: "WHAT??? WILL YOU DIE THE RICHEST MAN IN THE GRAVEYARD?" and then i make an unwise financial decision

the only reason why ten year old girls are destroying stupidly overpriced products at sephora to make “skincare smoothies” is because they aren’t being given access to a yard with a variety of mud, sticks, rocks, puddles, and old ceramic planters to make potions in. the children yearn for the apothecary

worst part about getting angry is how much it makes you want to be mean

sorry i said something dickish. a few mildly frustrating things happened to me in succession and it turned me evil

fucking love when I'm on a call with someone and they start to do a little errand or go somewhere else and they say "and you're coming with me" like. absolutely I am let's go on an adventure I've been spirited away

personally i think you should be able to afford a place to live with a part-time job

dare i even say that, with how much technology has advanced in america, the 40 hour work week shouldn't be as commonplace and you should still get full-time employment benefits when you're working less than that actually

All the people in the notes saying 'that's too busy'... maybe this post just wasn't aimed at you.

me in dreamlight valley doing quests for characters i don't like so i can get dreamlight duties done and level myself up

Disney Dreamlight Valley Cooking Guide ✨

obsessed w/him actually

fun fact that I noticed while playing totk is that the flame, frost, and shock emitters all have a resemblance to the respective dragons

you can most notably see the resemblance in the horns

so the real question is

Who the fuck are you?

”ai boyfriend chat” you will never be mystic messenger

Wouldst thou like to live above averagely

aftg fic where everything is the same but the story is just told through bee’s therapy notes. just imagine the jump between sessions.

session 36: andrew is doing well this week, spending time with family and kevin, feeling needed. slight paranoia regarding new recruit, spoke about coping mechanisms when feeling as if loved ones are threatened. discussed the upcoming school year.

session 37: andrew has drugged the new recruit and interrogated him. tells me they’ve come to an understanding. no signs of remorse. discussed possible legal consequences of actions and how we could have addressed that more healthily. scheduling in for extra sessions to work on impulse control.