Hi San Diego.

Hypothyroidism: Day 20

I wanted to begin logging my journey with hypothyroidism in hopes of clearing my head of the cloudy thoughts and hopefully helping someone else who may be suffering the same thing.

For a little background: In September of 2015 the left nodule of my thyroid was removed due to a growing “tumor” (quoting the surgeon here) and I was left with the entire right side of my thyroid. I didn’t go to check my thyroid function until late January and that’s when I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism.

In simple “I’m not a doctor” language: my right “side” couldn’t compensate for the missing left “side” and my body has gone into full blown crazy mode with my metabolism and I’ve gained over 40 pounds in the last year with little to no change in diet and exercise habits.

I am currently on a medication called levothyroxine which (eventually) should balance out my hormone levels although I’m on a small dosage currently and will be checking my levels again in early March.

Now to the emotional stuff.

I’m on the verge of tears at all times. This is due to my bouncing levels but also because it’s one of the most stressful times of my life. I am getting married in 4 months, I’m looking for a full time job and trying to finish my last class of college at night while battling a body that is often times too exhausted to get up and do anything at all.

I have always attempted to be strong and proved to others that I can hold my own, so it is a struggle to tell my family that I cannot be the go-getter that I typically try to be at all times. This is a struggle for me. I feel that I look lazy to many people and even to myself, but I have to remind myself that I’m dealing with something bigger.

After 20 days of medication, every morning as I wake up, I have seen some improvement in my energy levels as well as my ability to stay asleep at night instead of waking up at 2am (hahaha, it’s 2 am right now!) and staying up until 4am. Currently this is the only real change I feel. My hunger fluctuates; some days I feel starved while other days I survive on a coffee and one meal.

I understand that this may not interest many of you but I chose to use Tumblr as an outlet for sharing this since it’s what I’m comfortable with and if you’re interested at all, I appreciate your support.

I won’t hesitate to continue to be my weird-ass normal self on all other social media outlets. (Even on Tumblr, if anyone even looks anymore.)

For Valentine's Day I turned into a dog and wore my fiancé's sweater until it made me itch. #happyvday