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Hi I Have No Life

@kermitsipshisliptontea-blog

Well I have no life and I'm in to many fandoms
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Masterlist

Welcome to Thornsewood (Prof.NovakxReader Au):

Mr. Brightside Series:

Taking Control (part 7 casxreader)

High School’s a Bitch (DeanxReader AU)

Prince!Cas Series:

Love Bites: A Supernatural Au (DeanxReaderxSam)

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You knew that look. You knew what he wanted you to do, but there was no way that was happening with someone in the backseat… while he was driving. He got the message from the look on your face.

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A funny thing about introducing a new queen into a hive that has lost its queen (or one that you’ve killed because her brood was too fighty). 

You have to introduce the new queen into the hive with these special queen cages that are stopped up with candy, and are open enough to let the hive smell the new queen, but not open enough that they can get in there and kill her.

Because they will kill her. 

When you first put the new queen in she smells like an intruder, but by the time it takes the bees to eat through the candy and free the queen, the queen’s pheromones will have had time to work and the hive will have gotten used to her.

From the outside this kinda seems like: 

“Yeh, we were all going to murder you to death before, but we’re full of candy now, so we’re cool. Oh yeh, and how about you be the new queen and stuff. Yeh, that’s cool too.” 

beekeeping is really weird

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angeldrake3

Listen, strange bee queens lyin’ in cages distributin’ candy is no basis for a system of government.

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Make The Worst Seem Better

Summary: Cas is jealous of you because since you’re a prophet, God speaks to you. However, His word isn’t quite rainbows and butterflies, and at some point you ask Cas to get you unconscious because every time you try to sleep a new vision disturbs you, and you just need your body to rest.

Pairing: Castiel x Prophet!Reader

Word count: 3779

Warnings: Swearing, Very light angst, Fluffy smut, Unprotected sex (you know the drill; use protection you guys)

A/N: This is my first smut piece so yeah, go easy on me please babes, also, my followers might notice I haven’t published in two weeks but I did have a week of midterms and then I needed to just do whatever for reading week so sorry about that but school comes first in my case :)

It’s late. A closer to sunrise than sundown kind of late. You’re in the bunker’s library, reading, trying not to fall asleep, dreading it. The Bible is open in front of you, but you’re not reading, as your eyes keep sliding over the words without trying to make them out. 

As you’re about to doze off, the bunker’s door loudly creaks open and startles you. Dean is the first to make his way downstairs, and as soon as he sees you out there, he muffles a curse.

“Damnit, Y/N , I thought we’d agreed you needed to get some sleep,” he patronizes you as he heads in your direction.

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Anonymous asked:

Hey Queeeeen Can you please tell me the name of the fic where the reader is the nanny of JJ and begins a relationship with J and Danneell? Thanks as xx

I have come across some parts of a series like that but I don’t remember who wrote it and I didn’t read it because it had a cheating on Danneel vibe to it if I recall. And I can stomach Jensen x reader fics if Danneel doesn’t exist, but if she’s painted as the bitch wife or bitch ex, I just keep scrolling. 

LET THEM BE HAPPY LOOK AT THESE BEAUTIFUL FUCKERS

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I’ve heard of a few fics like this, but I wonder if this might belong to @manawhaat. I know she had an RPF called Fools In Love that I was on the fence about reading.

OKAY YA’LL so the fic this lovely anon is asking about is INDEED Fools in Love by @manawhaat. This fic is literally 15k+ words, but it’s one of my FAVORITE fics i’ve ever read in my whole entire life, and worth every second you spend reading it. I’m STILL waiting patiently (not at all) for the sequel. let me also just say that it’s does not in any way paint Danneel as the bitch or bitch ex. It’s a polyamorous relationship with Jensen, the reader AND Danneel. Which means, Danneel is involved in the relationship and approves of everything. In fact, the reader is Danneel’s best friend. I highly HIGHLYYY recommend this fic, and you can read it HERE!

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manawhaat

Omfg Kait! You got me all blushy and in mah feels. Fuck, man. And ik part two is taking forever but there are more bodies and different dynamics and I get distracted way too easily. All I can say is thank you for that amazing rec. You’re fucking wonderful and I’m bright pink and squeeing. 

(And if you’re in the mood for some poly lovin’ or looking for the fic, you can read Fools In Love here)

Thanks for setting the record straight and tagging the fic @winchesterenthusiast. I will consider my feelings on polyamory and maybe read the fic

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His little girl (Joker fanfiction) 2

Request: Are requests still open??💗 If they are then could u maybe do one where you are Batman younger sister but you are also secretly in love with the Joker??

Part 2

A quiet gasp danced inside your mouth as your eyes widened in fear. You were laying on your side, with your back turned to the door, but you could still see the shadow of his figure on the wall in front of you. Now it so happens that only half of the duvet was covering your body, which means that a part of your butt was on full display, only partially covered by your pink, silky nightgown.

 You could see him turn his head towards your body and that’s when you found the courage to shut your eyes. Please let this be a dream. ‘’Ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaa.’’ The echo of his laugh chimed around the room like a deadly snare. ‘’Mmm, god look at that sweet little ass.’’ He purred as you heard him enter your room and walk over to your bed.

Finally, gaining the power to actually move, your only solution was to pull the covers over your head and curl your feet into a ball like a scared little mouse. The joker laughed at your pathetic attempt to escape him. You didn’t have the guts to scream. 

Breathing heavily under your pink duvet, you suddenly felt the bed move and a pair of strong arms, rip the covers off your body, causing you to crawl as far back into the wall as you could. ‘’P-please Mister J, please don’t hurt me’’ you started sobbing. Mister J tapped his finger on your lower lip and sighed. ‘’Ah-ah-ah, no funny business now.’’ You kept quiet and gazed into the mad clown’s eyes. For a second, the sweet little angel couldn’t keep her eyes of the devil.

Gripping the back of your neck, the joker forced your body out of bed and scooped you up and into his strong grip. 

Carrying you out of your room, you looked at him puzzled. ‘’What if I scream?’’ you dared to finally speak. The joker looked down at you and grinned. ‘’Ooh, you’re gonna scream, baby cheeks.’’ Then you felt a weird smell fill your nostrils and then everything around you went black.

You woke to the feeling of bumping. You felt your body rocking back and forwards as you tried to gain consciousness. A sudden bang to the head caused your eyes to burst open and your body shoot up. 

It was pitch black dark and you were lying on a cold, steal floor. After clearing your head, you figured you were in the back of a van.

Pulling your knees up to your chest, you hugged them tightly and nuzzled your pouting lips on the tips of your knees. Remaining like that for the rest of the trip, you felt your heart clench in your chest when the van suddenly stopped. 

You heard footsteps walk around the van, past you and towards the back. Taking a deep breath, you bit the insides of your cheeks as the doors opened and the sunlight hit your face. Squinting, blinded by the bright lights, you blinked and tried to see who was standing there.

Of course, it was no other than the clown prince himself. He looked at you and tilted his head. ‘’I could look at this all day’’ he hummed as he eyed you up and down. He walked over to you and placed your tired head in the palm of his hands. ‘’You’re gonna be my little girl’’ he smiled and licked your cheek. You sat there, scared out of your mind but also very intrigued.

His touch made your stomach jump, but it wasn’t in fear. It was this strange feeling of sadness whenever his fingers removed themselves from you. At first, you thought it resented you, but now all you wanted was for him to touch you again so you could feel that strange, tingly feeling possess your body.

You didn’t say a word as Mister J lifted you out of the van and into a huge mansion. It looked kind of like Bruce’s house, but it was a lot bigger. The joker could see your wild little eyes dart up and down, looking at his home. ‘’Yeah, you like that sweetheart? This is gonna be your new home, little pet.’’ He grinned down at you and breathed heavily as he looked down at the beautiful, pink-cheeked little child in his arms. 

In the peak of puberty, she had sweet, perky little breasts and plump lips. You see, the Joker had always wanted a little baby girl of his own.

Carrying you inside, he put you down once you were inside the house. ‘’Follow me’’ he commanded and started walking down the hallway. Turning your head back, you were faced with fifteen of his armed goons.

Mmm, better not, you thought to yourself as you carefully followed your beautiful monster down the hallway.

He walked up the stairs and up towards a big, beautiful room. Pushing the doors open, he stopped in his place and turned his head back to meet my eyes. ‘’Come to daddy’’ he growled. 

Something inside you itched and it was as if you wanted to squeal and run into his arms. However, you quickly suppressed and drowned that itch and put on a sour and reluctant face as you slowly paced towards him. You were not going to let that clown get inside your head.

Bruce had spent countless hours talking about The Joker, gossiping really, about how awful he was and all of the horrible things he has done. 

The thing about The Joker is that he doesn’t have a weakness. Nobody really knows anything about him and when he’s been locked up at Arkham, no shrink could ever diagnose him. He didn’t kill for money, he didn’t have a motive and he didn’t play by any rules.

It was obvious that the big and beautiful room before you was his master bedroom. A huge king-sized bed with purple sheets and long velvet drapes covering each window. 

Mister J pulled out a little pocket knife and your eyes widened with fear as you looked at him with pleading eyes. Mister J forcefully grabbed your chin and placed the knife on your lower lip. He didn’t press down, thank god, but he rubbed it slowly on your soft lip, careful not to puncture it.

You were both breathing heavily and his eyes were locked on his knife caressing your little lip. ‘’So beautiful’’ he whispered and looked up into your eyes. His gaze hypnotized you and again, you found yourself unable to take your eyes off him. 

Then his eyes changed to a darker shade and he ripped the knife off your lip, grazing it enough to draw blood. You whimpered in pain and he threw the knife to the ground. He grabbed your upper arm and dragged you in through a door inside of his bedroom. Inside was a smaller room.

It looked almost exactly like your room. Pink wallpaper, pink sheets, soft floorboards and on a mahogany desk over your bed, you noticed a little music box. ‘’This is where you sleep, little one’’ he grinned and rubbed your cheek with his thumb. This caused your inner cheek to rub against your teeth and you groaned in pain. Did everything about him have to be so violent and intense?

‘’Mister J, I have to go home. My brother is probably worried sick and I-uh don’t have my stuff so I don’t think this is the best night for a sleepover’’ you half joked at the clown, hoping he might appreciate a little joke to lighten the weird mood. You were wrong. A strong hand wrapped around your neck and pushed you into the nearest wall. 

Then Mister J used both of his hands to trap you, so that you couldn’t move out of his grip. ‘’Let us get one thing clear, kitten.’’ He spat and licked his lips. ‘’Yooou, belong to to me now. You will do as I say, when I say it. If you behave like the good little girl I know you can be, you’ll be rewarded. However, if you disobey like the bad little girl I know you are, I will punish you. And believe me sweetheart, my punishments are not light.’’ He raised his voice. ‘’I’ll have you on the floor, begging for me to kill you in minutes!’’ he shouted and slammed his hand on the wall next to your face, making you jump.

Nodding frantically, you muttered ‘’yes – sir.’’ Afraid he was going to practice one of his renowned punishments on you right now; you kept your head down. ‘’Now, the little lady needs some rest, am I right?’’ he arched an eyebrow at you and smirked. 

That same itch that you had felt before came creeping back as you felt like giggling and kissing the tip of his nose. Were there drugs in the air conditioning or something? Where the hell did this come from?

‘’Mm-hm.’’ You nodded your head and looked at his crimson lips. Mister J’s eyes darted from your eyes to your lips and back again. ‘’Tell me, are you enjoying yourself?’’ he asked in a serious tone but then a huge grin spread across his face. You had no idea what to answer him, so your eyes just darted around in face. ‘’Hmmm?’’ he purred as he leaned it and I felt my heart throbbing in my chest. His lips were on your chin and he placed a sloppy kiss right under your lower lip. 

You could feel him smirk when he could feel and probably hear how hard and fast your heart was beating. Mister J rolled his tongue down to your neck and licked your neck all the way up from your collar bone to your left hear. Then he placed the of your ear into his mouth and started sucking on it with his wet tongue and nibbling on it with his teeth. 

The pace of your breath was starting to quicken as he started sucking on your neck hard and growled. You instinctively tried to force your chin down because the feeling was so strong it sent shivers down to your toes.

It was like the joker could sense how it made you feel because every time you shivered, your heartbeat raised, or your toes curled, he growled and sucked harder on your neck. 

That part of you that was drawn and intrigued wanted you to place your hands on his neck and moan, but you forced yourself to ignore it. Unfortunately, that part of you seemed to grow stronger and more dominant for each time he placed his hands on you.

Pulling away, he bit down on your bloody lower lip and pulled on it with his teeth until it released with a wet pop. ‘’This is so those worthless goons know that yooou belong..to..me.’’

Smiling to himself, he backed away dramatically and took a bow before you before he disappeared into his own master bedroom. ‘’Sleep tight, don’t let the bedbugs bite. Haa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.’’ Jeez.

Wrapping your drugged body into the soft and warm blanket, you exhaled loudly and snuggled with your princess pillow. You heartbeat was slowing down to a regular pace and you found yourself able to relax for the first time in a long time. Looking over to the small clock on your nightstand, you could see that the time was 5:41 AM. Bruce and Alfred must be worried out of their minds.

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dash-of-dark

JUST FUCKING LISTEN. 

THIS IS HALLOWEEN BUT NOT LIKE YOU KNOW IT

reblog so others can hear it!

Where the hell are the Victorian Goths they should be all over this.

*SMASHES REBLOG BUTTON*

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ladyyatexel

this is some insta-reblog shit, my friends, i’m like 20 seconds in

HELL YES I LOVE THIS

THE ONLY AUDIO I WILL PAUSE MY MUSIC FOR

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Master list!

This is my master list, here you’ll find my stories and my imagines. Thanks so much to everyone who reads and likes my writing. I appreciate all the support!

[Updated 10-10-2016]

Stories

Hello Spence, it’s me. (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8 coming soon!)

Make It Right. (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3)

Coming Home. (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3)

Speak Now. (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3

Anon Requests

Imagines

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The first time Sam hears his mother say his name.

Nothing, i mean nothing, gets to me more then the moments in Supernatural where Sam interacts (or cannot interact) with Mary.

Jared captured this moment so well. That tiny smile of euphoria because he heard his mother speak his name, and then the heartbreak, because he never got to hear it ever before or again.

I mean it… nothing gets to me worse then Sammy feels. 

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Picture Perfect

This is my entry for @thing-you-do-with-that-thing’s SPN Movie Night Challenge! I picked the romantic comedy, Picture Perfect

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Count: 2,089

“Ok, everybody! Anyone have any questions? Comments? Concerns?” Your boss yells loudly at the end of your office meeting. “If you do, keep them to yourselves! It’s Friday so I don’t care!”

Your boss Tim jumps up and loosens his tie as he starts singing Can’t Stop The Feeling by Justin Timberlake around the conference room.

Your boss has always been a bit on the eccentric side. Almost like a version of Michael Scott, except dealing with it in real life is not that entertaining.

“Tim. Do you have a minute?” You say trying to get his attention.

“I want to talk about my promotion.”

“What promotion, Y/N?” Tim says looking confused.

Seriously?!

“The one I’ve been trying to talk to you about. The one that Matt Jones and Greg Wellington are also up for…”

“Oh, yes! I’m sorry but you’re not being considered for that, my dear.” Tim says gives you a sad face. 

I'M IN LOVE

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Poison and Wine (Part 2)

Once upon a time, you and Dean were best friends. Time and adulthood found you drifting apart, and it’s been years since you’ve seen him. But now that he’s here, working on the same case as you, you’re just as in love as you ever were. And Dean still isn’t.

As the hunt grows more and more dangerous, and you and Dean find yourselves growing closer, is there a happy ending this time?

Loosely based off this song by The Civil Wars. I hope y’all enjoy this new series! Feedback always appreciated!

Word Count: 2350

Warning: None for this chapter

“Good morning, sunshine!” Dean’s voice boomed through the room, followed by a chuckle, and as you jolted awake, you instantly regretted agreeing to work with him.

“Shut up,” you growled. Or at least, that’s what you meant to growl. It came out as more of an incoherent grunt-whine. Whatever. Dean knew what you meant.

“Oh, come on,” he prodded, “I’ve got coffee. And donuts.”

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